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Ok, so I don't know where to put this..or who to talk to about this, so here it goes.
I moved here a year ago, and since I moved it seems I exchanged, one set of problems from my original area(racism, bigotry) for new ones.
I have been here a year, and I after doing research, San Antonio seemed like the best fit for me. It was culturally hispanic, people were friendly, was ranked high on the cities for single people etc, etc.
Now the reality, I have been here a year and 2 months, friend wise, I have maybe one person who I could maybe consider a friend(Im a guy and shes in the middle of a divorce), anyway, I dont need to have a ton of friends, but maybe 3 or 4 would suffice and I have had a hard time making friends here. I don't know what it is. I try to be friendly and open minded, but I just seem to keep running into either people with issues, or people that are fake. I honestly am starting to wonder if its me or something else.
Employment....this is another issue. I just recently left the job that i was at. I have a BA in History and a Masters in Public Administration. I have been applying ever since I have moved here and have put in about 15 applications with the city alone, as well as various non profits and for some reason, I can't get a call back. I don't know why. I have had recruiters look at my resume, a friend back home, and nothing. My resume either gets the rejection email, or it gets the you meet the qualifications and we may contact you email, which never happens.
At this point, I don't want to work in another call center ever again. I am looking for some sort of professional white collar employment but I can't seem to get a job. Again, I don't know if its me or them.
Dating..another issue on itself. I was doing online dating and met some many crazy women, I could legitimately write a book on the subject. Everything from women flaking, abusive women(physically and emotionally), and women with STDS, I have finally seen it all. I actually just gave up on meeting someone here.
I am depressed and I don't know what to do anymore. Maybe I need to work on my people judging skills, but other than that, I am at the end of my rope, and I really just don't know what to do. Someone help me please...
Friends and dating: you need a hobby or two. Cycling, volunteering (somewhere that doesn't take community service "volunteers" because those are not the friends you need), some sort of hobby that will get you out there with a group of like-minded people. That's the best way to make friends. Worry about the friends first, the dating later. Even church might work for meeting women, some churches have great singles groups or events.
Employment: Devote a certain amount of time to your job search every day or every week...register on the state workforce website so you can see their job listings, get used to checking the job ads on the same websites (not craigslist) every day or every week, if you know someone who works at the place you want to work, ask if you can put them down as a reference.
Now the reality, I have been here a year and 2 months, friend wise, I have maybe one person who I could maybe consider a friend(Im a guy and shes in the middle of a divorce), anyway, I dont need to have a ton of friends, but maybe 3 or 4 would suffice and I have had a hard time making friends here. I don't know what it is. I try to be friendly and open minded, but I just seem to keep running into either people with issues, or people that are fake. I honestly am starting to wonder if its me or something else.
Wherever you go, there YOU are.
Quote:
Employment....this is another issue. I just recently left the job that i was at. I have a BA in History and a Masters in Public Administration. I have been applying ever since I have moved here and have put in about 15 applications with the city alone, as well as various non profits and for some reason, I can't get a call back. I don't know why. I have had recruiters look at my resume, a friend back home, and nothing. My resume either gets the rejection email, or it gets the you meet the qualifications and we may contact you email, which never happens.
At this point, I don't want to work in another call center ever again. I am looking for some sort of professional white collar employment but I can't seem to get a job. Again, I don't know if its me or them.
Yeah, avoid the call centers. You don't want to build up a resume with a lot of call center jobs on it.
Quote:
Dating..another issue on itself. I was doing online dating and met some many crazy women, I could legitimately write a book on the subject. Everything from women flaking, abusive women(physically and emotionally), and women with STDS, I have finally seen it all. I actually just gave up on meeting someone here.
I am depressed and I don't know what to do anymore. Maybe I need to work on my people judging skills, but other than that, I am at the end of my rope, and I really just don't know what to do. Someone help me please...
Try taking a vacation from dating for a while and pursue your own hobbies and interests. And travel. You'll be glad later that you used your time in that way.
I agree with Hedge. You need to join a group/club. Whether that is crossfit, yoga, cycling group (I see hundreds of cyclists on their Tuesday night ride), San Antonio Sports Social Club, or a gym. Even join a foodie group or beer group! Volunteering at Fiesta, Culinaria, or any other event. Join Beethoven's and be part of their social society. Take part in young professionals mixers and happy hours. The list can go on.
I've made great friends and dated some amazing women doing a few of the things I've just said. This isn't counting all the coworkers I've befriended. From my experience married coworkers hook you up with the best women. Good luck!
I think based on your degree and preferred employment field that volunteering within organization that you would like to work with would be a good step. See if any of those organizations you applied for need volunteers. (I think that's a possibility with an MPA?). That would get your foot in the door and get to know the people you would like to work with. Also what is keeping you in SA outside of maybe a lease? If there's nothing that is keeping you here spread your resume a bit further north and south. I won't advocate for you to uproot yourself for Austin or south Texas, but there are other areas in and around San Antonio that might work.
San Antonio is a hard city to make friends in, and this is coming from a Native San Antonian. When I check facebook many of the peope I was acquainted with are still very close to people they were close to in middle school and high school. It's kind of odd. I will fourth the getting involved in organizations and volunteering. Also consider the SA Sports and Social Club scene. They can place you on a team that would get you into a group. I know some people I worked with in the past that are now very close to the people they met through kickball. I will also second the church reccomendation. I made some great friends through the church I went to, and that wasn't even a large mega church like CBC or Oak Hills or Cornerstone.
Dating,yes. It's a problem in San Antonio. I have no advice there. I dated some big time losers in San Antonio and online dating was my go to. I avoided huge losers by waiting until a few weeks of several exchanges of messages before going on actual dates. That weeds out the people that just want to get laid or have other agendas (like traveling? Like let's go get a drink because I'm in town for a night?)
What kind of work experience do you have and what do you wanna do ? Seems like some don't really know and just shoot in the dark for whatever's there. Not to boast but I applied to one job and got an email response for an interview. it's how you present yourself either visually/resume. Not even really looking for a job either.
Wish you all the best. My wife and I moved here by choice bc wanted to be back and think it's a great place to be even for young prefessionals. She works a non profit so if you need some info feel free to send me a pm for job opportunity.
I think based on your degree and preferred employment field that volunteering within organization that you would like to work with would be a good step. See if any of those organizations you applied for need volunteers. (I think that's a possibility with an MPA?). That would get your foot in the door and get to know the people you would like to work with. Also what is keeping you in SA outside of maybe a lease? If there's nothing that is keeping you here spread your resume a bit further north and south. I won't advocate for you to uproot yourself for Austin or south Texas, but there are other areas in and around San Antonio that might work.
San Antonio is a hard city to make friends in, and this is coming from a Native San Antonian. When I check facebook many of the peope I was acquainted with are still very close to people they were close to in middle school and high school. It's kind of odd. I will fourth the getting involved in organizations and volunteering. Also consider the SA Sports and Social Club scene. They can place you on a team that would get you into a group. I know some people I worked with in the past that are now very close to the people they met through kickball. I will also second the church reccomendation. I made some great friends through the church I went to, and that wasn't even a large mega church like CBC or Oak Hills or Cornerstone.
Dating,yes. It's a problem in San Antonio. I have no advice there. I dated some big time losers in San Antonio and online dating was my go to. I avoided huge losers by waiting until a few weeks of several exchanges of messages before going on actual dates. That weeds out the people that just want to get laid or have other agendas (like traveling? Like let's go get a drink because I'm in town for a night?)
Lol yes a city of 2.4 million people and all we can find here are losers. The real trick is moving 90 miles north to find all the gems.
Op you really need to work on yourself first. Judging by your post moving here might not have been a good choice.
There are plenty of jobs in this city. They might not be in your degree field, you probably will not like them. You might very well end up working a blue collar labor job in the hot Texas sun, but they do come with a paycheck and are honest. Your Masters is a field that in 2012-13 alone had 43,600 graduates, trending up each year*. You are fighting a battle for those few jobs with an increasing number of applicants. I see a sign everyday at work that is calling for school teachers. You may be able to leverage that BA/History into a teaching job.
As for dating and women, the guy who discovers the algorithm for meeting his perfect match will be the richest and most famous person in the history of mankind.
I don't want to be mean to the original poster but this can be a lesson....it isn't just education that is important, it is the right education. There are tons of jobs here with the right education...
I look at your degrees and I see a teacher, possibly working your way up to asst principal and maybe principal...that isn't true everywhere just here. The schools here are always hiring.
As for dating, I agree with others...take a break and find some hobbies and hopefully you can "accidentally" meet someone with similar interests.
As someone who has worked for a non-profit and government agencies with a social science degree, I can say that Austin is a better place to find this kind of work. Being the capital, it naturally has a higher concentration of jobs with the state and state contractors. Travis County also has more job openings than Bexar County despite it having less people. They tend to have more grant-funded positions, and they're just a generally better-funded agency. I know from personal experience that it is difficult to get needed funding from the Bexar County Commissioners Court.
As for dating, the Austin area has a higher percentage of people with a 4-year degree. I don't know if that'll make a difference for what you're looking for. I find it a little bit easier to find educated men up here who don't already have 2 or 3 baby mamas by the age of 25.
Last edited by L210; 04-23-2016 at 09:44 AM..
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