affording san diego (apartment, income, employment)

[sbmohr75]

My wife and I make a combined income of 70k before taxes. We don't have kids. We rent a two bedroom apartment in UTC, and have one modest car payment. On our income, we are able to buy almost all organic food, eat out 1-2 times a week, go to the movies and still have money to take a couple of trips a year. We don't go out to bars or buy unnecessary things. I guess it just depends where your priorities are, but being single with 57k after taxes I think you would live really, really well in SD.

[LookingtoLeave]

A lot of people who are merely wanting to rent can map out their expenses prior to moving so they know if they could even afford SD. If you already have a job lined up and know what your salary is, just go to PaycheckCity.com - Employee Self-Service Tools To Better Manage Your Paycheck and it will tell you exactly how much you will bring home after CA taxes.

From there, take out any employer deductions you elect such as insurance, 401(k), etc to know what you personally will take home. Then decide how much you can allocate to rent, bills, car, food, etc. Money wise, one of the few things this forum can give you that you can't research on your own is an idea of electricity, phone, gas, and other bills that vary per city. You yourself can go to a multitude of websites to see how much rent will be for an apt. in your desired area.

Only you really know if you can afford SD because each of us has our own particular spending habits or additional debt. For each person on the board that says you have to make 6 figures there are 2 more saying you don't have to.

[Jaded]

Originally Posted by Wordgirl99

I agree that S.D. is a beautiful place to live. My husband and I are originally from Orange County--also beautiful.

But we were transferred to Cary/Raleigh/Chapel Hill areas for 12 years before moving to S.D. My husband got a new job in S.D. about 1 1/2 yrs. ago. We HATE IT here. Just not for us. We loved having the big, gorgeous house and grounds in Cary for the same price (Cary is upscale and not cheap like some of the southeast), and loved the community and the fact that we didn't have to drive for 2 hours for each "good" place we wanted to go.

S.D. is great for very wealthy people, though, since you can live closer to the good weather (which, frankly, is coastal or near coastal only) and "better" places (they are few and far between in North County, in my opinion). And I can't stand traffic (though Cary/Raleigh is the 15th fastest growing area in the U.S., and it does have some traffic, but nothing like this), so our goal is to go back to our "adopted" home, where it is hot in the summer, but really mild winters, and I can live with that.

I agree with you--it does take half of your life to figure out what you really want. We made a big mistake coming back here (but did it partly because our whole family is here and in Orange County). But we will never consider this "home."

P.S. I'd be suspicious of homes selling in the mid-$300's. We have looked at homes for rental income, but these are usually neighborhoods I would personally not consider living in (and that's in cheaper areas in North County, like Oceanside).

We've become such a materialistic generation. I can understand your frustration, and agree that SD salaries are much lower than the cost of living. But, I believe the housing costs rose disproportionately to salaries over the past six/seven years.

From reading your posts, it seems that what may be making you and your husband unhappy is that in Cary, you were essentially a "big fish in a small pond." The triangle area may be beautiful and housing may be affordable, but you can't compare the South to the West Coast.

Upon moving back to San Diego, and you not working, I imagine because you may have children, you immediately became the "little fish in a big pond." This would understandably make anyone miserable and upset.

Once salaries rise and housing falls, San Diego will indeed be much more affordable than OC and LA. Easily.

[Wordgirl99]

Originally Posted by Jaded

From reading your posts, it seems that what may be making you and your husband unhappy is that in Cary, you were essentially a "big fish in a small pond." The triangle area may be beautiful and housing may be affordable, but you can't compare the South to the West Coast.

Upon moving back to San Diego, and you not working, I imagine because you may have children, you immediately became the "little fish in a big pond." This would understandably make anyone miserable and upset.

Since I've lived both places (but again, am orig. from Orange County), I think I can compare the Southeast (it is not considered the "South," by the way, since it is on the East Coast and in the Mid-Atlantic) with the West Coast a bit better than most.

The "big fish" theory--way off. The Triangle is super-educated (Research Triangle Park has all of the medical research companies, Duke Medical Center, etc.). Far more educated than S.D. (at least North County), and salaries were commisserate. Median salary in Cary is well over $70k, higher than S.D. overall.

We were far from "big fish," as many neighbors held Ph.D.'s. In North County, we are definitely bigger fish, if you want to call it that. So we've got that in our favor, lol.

I don't expect anyone to understand, though, unless they have lived in both places for a while.

ETA: I think the over-crowding (which causes the traffic, high COL, etc.) is only going to get worse. If you can stay in your city full-time, it won't be as bad.

[Wordgirl99]

Originally Posted by LookingtoLeave

Outta curiosity, if they're illegal, how is their salary being counted? Essentially aren't illegals supposed to be somewhat "non-existent" in terms of work and pay?

Illegals are still hired; that's what the govt. is supposedly going to crack down on. Their salaries are still reported.

[LookingtoLeave]

Originally Posted by Wordgirl99

Illegals are still hired; that's what the govt. is supposedly going to crack down on. Their salaries are still reported.

I guess it's different there than here in TX. Typically illegals here that do manual labor or work at restaurants are paid cash under the table since they have no social or visa # to provide for tax-deduction purposes. So in the governments eyes, they know nothing about them.

[Jaded]

Originally Posted by Wordgirl99

Since I've lived both places (but again, am orig. from Orange County), I think I can compare the Southeast (it is not considered the "South," by the way, since it is on the East Coast and in the Mid-Atlantic) with the West Coast a bit better than most.

The "big fish" theory--way off. The Triangle is super-educated (Research Triangle Park has all of the medical research companies, Duke Medical Center, etc.). Far more educated than S.D. (at least North County), and salaries were commisserate. Median salary in Cary is well over $70k, higher than S.D. overall.

We were far from "big fish," as many neighbors held Ph.D.'s. In North County, we are definitely bigger fish, if you want to call it that. So we've got that in our favor, lol.

I don't expect anyone to understand, though, unless they have lived in both places for a while.

ETA: I think the over-crowding (which causes the traffic, high COL, etc.) is only going to get worse. If you can stay in your city full-time, it won't be as bad.

Okay, I wasn’t going to go here, but I can’t resist. I have a sister who moved to NC and claims this very same thing. Yes, NC is bordered by the Atlantic Ocean, but Mid-Atlantic it is not. It always has and continues to be considered part of “the South.”

A few questions:

Do you have the option of ordering grits for breakfast at many local restaurants?
Do you have to order “unsweetened” tea as opposed to the normal “sweet tea?”
Do many people address you and your husband as “yes ma’am and yes sir?”
Outside of the Triangle, how rural is NC?
Is there distinct segregation outside of the Triangle?

Also…

“The United States Census Bureau classifies North Carolina as a southern state in the subcategory of being one of the South Atlantic States.” (Wikipedia, North Carolina)

Local advertisement…note, it states “Southern States”
Wikipedia, Southern USA
NY Times & Monster

Comparing NC to San Diego is like comparing San Francisco to Oakland just because they both are bordered by bodies of water. Regardless of having lived in both places, it doesn’t make them comparable on equal terms, it only confirms their differences.

No doubt as many Californians have moved to the South, that they somehow want to re-write history so that their newly embraced region should now be considered the Mid-Atlantic and Southeast. You are indeed East of California, bordered by the Atlantic Ocean, but definitely in the South! Look up Mason-Dixon Line. You will have a very hard time convincing native North Carolinians that they are not only Southern, but proud of it.

BTW, my reference to the fish and pond usage had nothing to do with education, as many in San Diego are very educated…we have world renown universities too. It had to do with income, status and your perception of “having more” in NC while feeling as if you “have less” in San Diego.

[305guy]

Originally Posted by Wordgirl99

Since I've lived both places (but again, am orig. from Orange County), I think I can compare the Southeast (it is not considered the "South," by the way, since it is on the East Coast and in the Mid-Atlantic) with the West Coast a bit better than most.

The "big fish" theory--way off. The Triangle is super-educated (Research Triangle Park has all of the medical research companies, Duke Medical Center, etc.). Far more educated than S.D. (at least North County), and salaries were commisserate. Median salary in Cary is well over $70k, higher than S.D. overall.

We were far from "big fish," as many neighbors held Ph.D.'s. In North County, we are definitely bigger fish, if you want to call it that. So we've got that in our favor, lol.

I don't expect anyone to understand, though, unless they have lived in both places for a while.

ETA: I think the over-crowding (which causes the traffic, high COL, etc.) is only going to get worse. If you can stay in your city full-time, it won't be as bad.

Lived in North Carolina for 3 years. North Carolina is "the south", and NC considers itself "The south" as well. As does Virginia, South Carolina and Georgia.

[Northern Drifter]

^^^ No thanks, Im going to pass on living in Tijuana. Wayyyyyy too much crime, its like a whole other world crossing from San Diego

[gyro]

lived in SD all my life..we're leaving for NC
Housing here is outlandish..as is gas...and the lowest wages around
If you don't have $250K to put down on a place to live, you're going to
be stuck with converted condo living...and all that entails.