Where do the 18 year old women hang out at in the SF Bay Area? (house, university)

[Jaime Baratheon]

Originally Posted by Ceece

You need to fix YOURSELF before thrusting yourself upon a young girl. Literally.

But define "fix" And I'm not advocating "thrusting" myself on a "young girl". Let us hear us YOUR SINS?

[sade693]

I don't recommend it.

When I was 17-19, I dated much older guys. One twice my age, one ten years older than me, and the other more than twice my age and with two kids who were in my peer bracket.

Having been the young woman in these relationships and knowing a couple of other young women who did the same, I can tell you that any woman in the 18-19 age range who's willing to date a man as old as you is a woman suffering from crippling insecurities. The men in those types of arrangements, from my experience, have been one or both of the following: a) super immature themselves or b) preying on "easy" targets.

One of the older men I was with even explicitly told me that he wanted a "follower more than a companion." He was an emotionally stunted drug addict. The other two were normal, stable men who just wanted easy sex from a person too timid to question them or ask for anything in return. It wasn't until I got my head straight that I realized just how toxic and unhealthy those relationships were.

I'm not saying that it's impossible for a relationship with a huge age gap to work, but I am saying that there are typically questionable dynamics in those relationships (particularly the ones where one in the couple is under 25). You've admitted that you have issues in this thread, and they all suggest that you fall into the two categories that I listed above. My best advice would be for you to get your life together so that connecting to people your own age doesn't feel so alien.

Of course, you're going to do what you're going to do. I just ask that you be honest about what it is you're doing.

[Zelpha]

Well Jaime Baratheon, I'm a 38-year-old woman who is actually a lot like you. At age 36 I was in community college, then transferred to two vocational schools. Now I'm a yoga instructor, personal trainer, and massage therapist. I also had a troubled childhood, nutty unstable parents, unfulfilling twenties. In my thirties I have dated men ranging from their late (legal) teens to late twenties, and even a man identically my age.

Anyway Jaime, I sympathize with you. Yes you seem a bit creepy for specifically seeking 18-year-olds, but look at it this way: don't plan or expect or aim for anyone specific. Just visualize your dreams and LIVE life as normal, and what you need and what is best for you will come to you.

[eureka1]

You need therapy.

[comingbacktocali]

you want to date somebody who could technically be the age of a child of yours?

[Ceece]

Originally Posted by Jaime Baratheon

But define "fix" And I'm not advocating "thrusting" myself on a "young girl". Let us hear us YOUR SINS?

I mean, you admit you have certain issue and now you want a young girl to be part of your life because you think she will someone be able to fix you or give you a relationship you can't have otherwise. You will be dumping your problems onto her, and you are aiming for an age when a girl should NOT have to be dealing with some old guys issues. Don't you see the problem? It's selfish.

Thrusting is a word, it's not a sin.

[gizmo980]

Originally Posted by Idon'tdateyou

36 and in community college? Is this a second degree or the first one? I received my masters at 33.

Good for you, but not everyone has the ability to go straight through from HS - college. I finished my MLIS by 30, however I hadn't finished the BA until 25, since I was going through some rough times at the beginning. And isn't that kind of the point of community colleges? I took a few classes at South Lake Tahoe CC, and would estimate around half (if not more) of the students were over 30. At least they're trying to accomplish something, no matter how "old" they are at the time.

[Ruth4Truth]

Where are the 18 year olds? At HS graduation ceremony, and then in the Fall, at Freshmen orientation at a university near you.

In-between those 2 events, they're either at the mall, or working someplace, if they're lucky enough to have jobs.

[bigdumbgod]

Originally Posted by gizmo980

At least they're trying to accomplish something, no matter how "old" they are at the time.

They may be trying to accomplish luring unsuspecting young pretties to the candy van.

[pacific2]

Where do the 18 year old women hang out at in the SF Bay Area?

Maybe around 18-22 year-old young guys, or just anyplace where they can hide away from "old men" with whom they have almost nothing in common.

Having youth on their side gives them a better chance of running away from "creepy geezers."