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Old 06-05-2014, 07:25 PM
 
Location: Bay Area, CA/Seattle, WA
833 posts, read 1,198,948 times
Reputation: 835

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As soon as I read the first sentence I cracked up. This thread is so full of win it's ridiculous. I think we have the $500 winner in our presence. Give that man $500 extra dollars for his Tahoe trip! he deserves it!!!

On the other hand it could be much worse. IE that homeless guy you passed. I'm sure he would love to trade places with you.
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Old 06-05-2014, 07:36 PM
 
Location: SF Bay Area
18,982 posts, read 32,644,089 times
Reputation: 13630
The description of Bay Area drivers was the best part IMO lol. Post of the year OP!
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Old 06-05-2014, 09:50 PM
 
282 posts, read 618,246 times
Reputation: 389
Thanks guys
I thought i might get flamed & hated upon but it was all in good fun, just a different perspective on life here in the bay area from the "average joe". I realize there were many grammatical errors & although I am undereducated & kind of stupid its mostly cause I typed it really fast on my phone sitting in my truck whilst marveling at the majestic deep blue surf crashing its glorious mist upon the golden rugged shoreline of pacifica by the sea.
I was also bumped in to by like 3 priuses trying to turn around in the parking lot while typing which caused me to hit some wrong keys & forget how to punctuate correctly.

PS. I will shamelessly accept the $500. I do promise however that with the $ I will buy that homeless guy a beer and sandwich, pay my fast track bill, donate $50 to a good cause & then spend the remainder going up to Tahoe for the weekend and having a good time with my girlfriend

Last edited by BodegaHead; 06-05-2014 at 10:09 PM..
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Old 06-05-2014, 10:02 PM
 
Location: California
37,135 posts, read 42,203,740 times
Reputation: 35012
Yes to super burritos and coca cola.
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Old 06-05-2014, 10:08 PM
 
282 posts, read 618,246 times
Reputation: 389
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ceece View Post
Yes to super burritos and coca cola.
Hella!
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Old 06-05-2014, 10:27 PM
 
1,650 posts, read 3,518,533 times
Reputation: 1142
Yall have exciting lives. I just work and do household chores...-
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Old 06-05-2014, 10:45 PM
 
1,696 posts, read 2,860,377 times
Reputation: 1110
Post of the Year. Period.

So, should we crowd-source-fund-whatever-the-hell-you-call-it a trip to Tahoe for OP?
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Old 06-05-2014, 11:09 PM
 
Location: Bay Area, CA/Seattle, WA
833 posts, read 1,198,948 times
Reputation: 835
Quote:
Originally Posted by bobby_guz_man View Post
Post of the Year. Period.

So, should we crowd-source-fund-whatever-the-hell-you-call-it a trip to Tahoe for OP?
Exactly what I was thinking. Raise some money family!

Ps. Give me some too. My $2200 apartment ain't cheap yall.
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Old 06-05-2014, 11:22 PM
 
Location: San Francisco, CA
15,088 posts, read 13,449,172 times
Reputation: 14266
Quote:
Originally Posted by BodegaHead View Post
As I awaken on a scrumtralecent misty morning in my 1 bed apartment I pay $2000 a month for after losing my home I worked to save for for ten years only to then be priced out of the area & market through a divorce situation I crack some Petaluma eggs & cook them to a slight golden perfection over easy. I then gently sip my organic local coffee as the fog wisps gracefully over the neighboring chapparal encrusted hillside offering little hope of a true summers day but one much like mark Twains memoirs where the cool gentle 30mph breeze at 55* competes with the snow ladened winters of old New England.

Shortly after finishing my locavorian cuisine I bid farewell to my beloved sweetheart , a 5th generation bay area native with a college degree that shares this glorius 700 sq ft abode with me because there is no way we could afford a $750k shack. I then get into my lovely truck with 195k miles & enjoy an absolute visually orgasmic 1 hr commute to a job that pays $25 an hour which would be a decent living most places in the world but here it affords me a very "modest" lifestyle. On my drive I pass the halcyon spleondor of golden gate park where I see a deranged homeless man michtorate on a silver eucalyptus tree that is swaying in the pacific wind. I then cross the golden gate bridge as I enjoy incredible views of the city, the golden hillsides & a few nice European tourist girls booties. The fog is cresting over angel island as 3 brand new BMWs & a maserati cut me off & then jam their brakes for no apparent reason. I venture on, work throughout the glorious day working for people with more money than god himself because they achieved something I didn't being born into a well off family. I am just one of " those other people " but I live my life & it doesn't really matter as I also am going to school on the side to further myself so I can make maybe $80-100 instead of $50-60k a year. If I do that then I may one day be what the mayor of sf considers "middle class". I doubt I will ever achieve the degree of success & mastery of the " others" who have spent their lives in an office doodling on a PC for $150k plus a year but at least I am trying my personal best & doing what I love for better of worse.

As the days winds on I enjoy an authentic Mexican super burrito & wash it down with a glass bottle of coca cola like Peter Fonda in 1973. The California sunshine dominates golden over the clear blue skies that would lay the baxkround for perfect dreams of heaven, like the sky was painted by Michelangelo himself. I then retire from my days work to gently breeze down the 101 Freeway where I sit in a sea of luxury vehicles & priuses who for some reason seem to have a driving "handicap' but I am so thankful they are saving our planet with their superior battery hybrid design. I then make it back across the gg bridge to watch the sun hovering low over the azure pacific ocean like a gentle caressing lover gently caressing a kiss from their lover as the marine layer vicously sweeps back in & almost blows my truck into another BMW 5 series but i hold strong & regain control of the wheel & glide through the golden toll booth to be charged a small fee for crossing the magnificence of the structure & the city I love welcomes me with open arms, "oh crap!", another Prius almost sideswipped me going 10 mph but I fret not as I return home to my beloved. I immediately partake in the foamy ecstacy of a lagunitas ale & a locavarian salad from half moon bay that my beloved has crafted from organic purple & red tipped glistening emarald green leaves & a goats milk cheese. I then play my love a song on the classical guitar romancing her & promising we can spend the weekend in Tahoe when I can save a few extra bucks. She elates, says " I love you" & kisses me passionately & asks if I can drive her to work in the morning cause her car is "acting up" again. I say "Of course my love", sip my local ale & then sit on my fat ass & watch TV until I pass out.
LOL... Awesome. Pulitzer-worthy stuff there.
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Old 06-05-2014, 11:33 PM
 
Location: Bay Area, CA/Seattle, WA
833 posts, read 1,198,948 times
Reputation: 835
http://gfwd.at/1hCWFTC <------------ I set up a donation account here.

Bodega PM me and we'll set it up to your account!! Lets send this man to Tahoe ya'll!!!
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