Regarding moving to San Francisco or suburb of SF from N.H. (Sacramento: transplants, apartment)

[Stefos1]

Hi everyone,

So, my NH experience has been bad to low average insofar as things to do, dating and career expansion is concerned and I'm considering getting a job in San Francisco should the Fed. Gov't offer it to me.

I have not delved into the San Francisco Chamber of commerce, so please forgive the
apparent ignorance, as of right now anyway

I would appreciate any insights into the following areas:

1. Location to live in & cost

I need a "doable" place around $850 to $1000 a month. If a higher rent bracket should be considered,
then $1000-$1200 is my cap.

If this is not what rent goes for in any burb of SF, please let me know which surrounding area would be

2. Dharma practice

I am a Dharma practitioner and wanted to know if both Buddhist & Hindu temples/groups can be readily found in San Francisco.

3. The dating scene

New England is very "hardened" insofar as the outlook of women are concerned toward
dating someone.....IE.: A clean cut look with some vestiges of Hipster (Big beard or slightly more than normal beard) and tight skinny jeans OR a clean cut "younger executive" look with collared shirt-no tie, dress slacks and dress shoes. LOL.........it's true, that is the scene here.
If you don't have those looks, you're out, in their minds.

How open minded are women in the San Fransisco area to date insofar as a guy not falling into the New England "mold" I mentioned above? (Yes I do realize this a very broad question)

Thank you very much for any and all insights and sorry if I stepped on any toes.
I'm just trying to be real.

Stefos1

[humboldtrat]

Originally Posted by Stefos1

Hi everyone,
1. Location to live in & cost

I need a "doable" place around $850 to $1000 a month. If a higher rent bracket should be considered,
then $1000-$1200 is my cap.

If this is not what rent goes for in any burb of SF, please let me know which surrounding area would be

Startup dreams meet pop-up rentals - SFGate

This article is 4 years old and it hasn't gotten any better! Rent is a little cheaper in the suburbs but not by much. For that kind of money, plan on room mates.

[boulder2015]

1. Roommates or a terrible commute from a dump are your only options at your budget. I would go with roommates.

2. Plenty of spiritual options. You should be OK in this arena. Working in sf will provide you with tests on a daily basis of your spiritual path if you are open to that kind of struggle.

3. Women are less likely to judge you but keep in mind sf is very business oriented these days. Lots of east coast transplants.

[Vision67]

Rent near San Fran for $1000 per month?

hahahahahahahaha

[boulder2015]

Originally Posted by Vision67

Rent near San Fran for $1000 per month?

hahahahahahahaha

Even the ops top end of 1200 is a stretch.

[Novatoman]

Hi Stefos1,
With your budget you can realistically find a small room (in someone's home) for rent around SF. For a 1bd apartment you would have to allocate about $2K/month, just for rent. Please note, you are considering a move to one of the most expensive areas in already expensive state... When people consider a move to San Francisco they usually make over $100K/year for a single person, allocating roughly $35/year for rent.

Suggestion here is don't move to SF, yet. If you like California there are so many other places with rents being less expensive. Check out Sacramento area, for example, instead. It is couple hours drive from SF, so you can visit SF often. It gets hot in summer but it is way more affordable. And it is a capitol city with government jobs.
Good luck!

[likealady]

Originally Posted by Stefos1

I need a "doable" place around $850 to $1000 a month. If a higher rent bracket should be considered,
then $1000-$1200 is my cap.

If this is not what rent goes for in any burb of SF, please let me know which surrounding area would be

I don't think this is possible in the Bay Area at all. Maybe a room, out in the boonies.

[candalf]

Dharma is mostly in San Francisco, Oakland or Berkeley. Quite a few places in those 3 cities. It is interesting that it came in #2 on your list. Therein may lie the root of your uneasiness with your present station in life Just kidding

You should be able to find a liveable 2-bedroom in low 2,000's, thus putting you at $1000-$1100 if you share. Not in SF proper, but within train-able/bus-able distance to the happening places.

Never dated here. Compared to East Coast, appearances and following some mold are much less important, that I confirm. Be advised, though, that several of my East Coast friends pointed out that while Californians seem to be open and overly happy to meet you, that is often superficial- lasting bonds are easier to form back East (once again, this coming not from my personal experience).

Don't listen to people who say how horrible it is here (or anywhere). When there is a will, there is a way.

[NhMcTsOg]

You mentioned a job in Albany. So, East Bay. For your rent budget, you'll be looking at roommates, or a room in someone's house. This may or may not put limits on your dating options; are women in Dharma non-materialistic and communally minded?

Straight female acquaintances in the Bay Area come across to me as substantially more superficial in their approach to dating (all the while smiling and talking about getting together) than the New England women I've known who were dating there. But if you're monogamously oriented, you only need to meet one right woman.

To get direct feedback of Bay Area women's reactions to you, you might create a dating profile with current pictures, listing your location as Albany. (For accuracy, do not list it as SF.)

If you feel ready to make a move, you can make it work. It just won't be instantly a perfect situation. Are you able to visit the Bay Area (and SD, as you mentioned in other posts) to see what feels like the best match for you?

[Hackopotamus]

Glad to see you are giving up on trying to change NH!

I moved to CA from NH 30 years ago. The state has changed a bit since then. The biggest impact of course was the weather although SF might not be the best example.

The cost of living here compared to NH is outrageous! Not just housing but taxes (income, sales, gas, food, etc). You will also find that you spend more money because there is a lot more. However, there is plenty to do that is free too (hiking, beach/ocean, site seeing, outdoor stuff but you may not like that stuff).

My income doubled when I moved from NH (I was in IT) but my cost of living did not so I had extra income. I was married at the time so my wife's income increased greatly too. If you have a government job that may not be the case so keep that in mind.

I love SF but would never live there. It is a great place to visit.As others have said, I would recommend Sac or many other cities. Also consider SoCal. Not sure about what kind of government work you do or where you could get transferred. I guess that will make a difference.

There is definitely way more to do and see in CA vs NH. There is also way more traffic (or should I say "there is traffic" because there isn't any in NH! If you think there is just get on the 580, 680, 880, 101 at rush hour!).

The best thing to do is come out for a visit to get an idea of what it is like. It is a completely different world. When I moved out I came out for 1 week in Sac and then 2 weeks in SoCal and stayed with my brother in Manhattan Beach. I rented a car and drove all over checking out different towns. You can get a good feel for different areas but still won't know what it is like until you are living here.