Silicon Valley IT job etiquette (how much, employment, closing)

[80skeys]

Hi all, I've got a hypothetical job related question. Let's say I've been working at my current job for just three months. For whatever reason, I'm not satisfied, and I start a job search and eventually receive an offer I like from another company.

I inform my current boss and he wants to know details: name of the company, salary they offered, how did I find the job, etc? What's the etiquette here: answer his questions? Politely decline to answer? Etc?

[80skeys]

in other words, when I turn in my resignation, how much information is appropriate to divulge to my current employer? I'm new to the Bay Area and don't know what is the standard protocol. Someone told me not to tell them the salary I was offered, but I've heard other people use it as leverage (which I would not be interested in doing in this case.)

[zitsky]

Originally Posted by 80skeys

in other words, when I turn in my resignation, how much information is appropriate to divulge to my current employer? I'm new to the Bay Area and don't know what is the standard protocol. Someone told me not to tell them the salary I was offered, but I've heard other people use it as leverage (which I would not be interested in doing in this case.)

If you are resigning, then all that info is none of their business. If they are willing to make a counter offer, then I would tell them what your new salary would be. However it sounds like you might want out of there regardless of salary. I can't imagine giving them all the info they are asking for. I've worked for several Silicon Valley startups and I've never been asked that info. I've never given out that info, and I don't think I ever would.

[80skeys]

Thanks for your response. I would have thought more people would have pitched in on this one. ... Sensitive topic?

[bigdumbgod]

Originally Posted by 80skeys

Thanks for your response. I would have thought more people would have pitched in on this one. ... Sensitive topic?

Nope. "It's none of their business" is all that need be said.

[jbunniii]

Agree. It's none of their business.

[SportyandMisty]

Perhaps a slightly nicer way of saying it is "my new employer considers compensation to be company confidential, and I certainly don't want to get off on the wrong foot with them, as I'm sure you'd agree."

Your "old" boss, in the hypothetical, might ask you why you were changing jobs so quickly - was there something that pissed you off, etc. He would probably also ask "what will it take to keep you."

You should probably be prepared for those types of questions. If it really is just money, then you might say something like "Now that I've moved to Silicon Valley, I've found out two things. First, it is very expensive to live here - even more than I imagined. Second, I found out my skill set is truly in demand and potential employers came after me - I didn't seek them out."

Be prepared for two things to happen: (1) your old boss (current?) offers you more money or marches you in to an executive to try to convince you to stay, and (2) they decide to just cut their losses and literally walk you out the door, taking your badge, etc.

But of course this is all hypothetical.

[Winston Smith]

Originally Posted by zitsky

If they are willing to make a counter offer, then I would tell them what your new salary would be. However it sounds like you might want out of there regardless of salary.

More or less my thoughts, too. I've been in situations like this. Quite honestly, I wouldn't trust that a counter offer would signal a higher paid same-ol-same-ol. For one thing, you're now marked as someone who will leave quickly. Not that it's a bad thing (we must look out for ourselves these days), but some managers might be stodgy about it. So say you decline the new job, take their counter offer, and the old company finds subtle ways to "punish" you for your "jump-ship" attitude. Now the relationship deteriorates further and you might find yourself looking again soon. Honestly, every time I think, "nah, they wouldn't be so petty," I've been proven wrong.

I prefer to decline any counter offers, leave on good terms, stay in touch with the former employer incase the new job doesn't work out, and honor the start date at the new job. Good luck!

[wellyouknow]

Strangest thing, I changed plenty of jobs in Silicon Valley and have never encountered such situation with the former boss asking me for this kind of info. It's even in every employment contract I sign: "Both parties agree that employment is at will and can be terminated by either party for ANY reason at any time" 2 week notice is a common courtesy, but even that is not necessary, and definitely disclosing any info on the new employer is out of the question. Did you have one of those "exit interviews"? You are not obliged by any etiquette to disclose anything, UNLESS you want to stay there and just want to bargain with your new employment leverage, but even if you get your way and stay at the old company, your position will be forever compromised.

[80skeys]

SportyandMisty: well put.
Winston: I read online somewhere that most people who accept a counter-offer end up leaving within 6 months anyway, for many of the reasons you outlined.
wellyouknow: good advice.