Relocating from Cali to Savannah, now scared (Atlanta, Decatur: employment, homes)

[notswedish]

Hey everyone

I am relocating to Savannah for personal reasons. I am looking at the Islands and possibly Tybee to live. I am not trying to sound ignorant BUT I have always lived in very liberal areas and I am starting to be afraid of threads I have seen about racial strife, crime, etc. We are a very "colorful" family, I am a lesbian, my daughter is of mixed heritage. Now, I am scared and revisiting my feelings about the South that I have harbored since my Yankee-childhood. Any thoughts on how we might fare there? I know everything is what you make it, but now I am panicking.

[atlantagreg30127]

I hope you don't mind my asking this personal question, but what is the particular personal reason that as a lesbian with a mixed-race child you chose to move to the most conservative part of the country when relocating?

I mean it's none of my business, and I doubt you'll have any burning crosses in your yard when you move in there. But I've stayed down there a few times and even compared to Atlanta there's an extreme culture shock - and Atlanta is much closer to the Savannah "way of life" than any place in California by far. It's definately going to be a major culture shock for you in some ways so I was just being nosey to see what could prompt such a move to that area from such a non-traditional family unit.

Savannah definately has it's funky side and it's not exactly Mayberry, either. So hopefully people can steer you toward the funkiness side of it all and avoid any pockets of "Deliverance". Good luck with your move.

[Padgett2]

You may find the perfect fit for you and your child in Savannah. On the other hand, you could find yourself living on the same block with an unusual number of strict, up-tight, conservative, overly pious, bigots. You could find that anywhere, not just Savannah. You would be miserable and your child wouldn't have any playmates.

Therefore, if you do come, investigate where you choose to live very carefully. How you would go about doing that, is something that I don't know. Stay out of the high crime areas, as that's just asking for trouble. If you need employment, be very sure that you have it before you come.

And, above all, recognize the fact that Savannah is much, much more than the Historic District. All kinds of people with all sorts of mixtures and skin coloring live here happily. But no one can say for sure if you will find a spot that will suit you.

Think long and hard about moving for personal reasons. The chances are that you could work things out where you are among friends and in familar places better than you could among total strangers. Our problems tend to follow us wherever we go.

Now, if that sounds like a lecture from your grandmother, I'm sorry! But, I must honestly tell you how it seems to me.

[notswedish]

Originally Posted by Padgett2

You may find the perfect fit for you and your child in Savannah. On the other hand, you could find yourself living on the same block with an unusual number of strict, up-tight, conservative, overly pious, bigots. You could find that anywhere, not just Savannah. You would be miserable and your child wouldn't have any playmates.

Therefore, if you do come, investigate where you choose to live very carefully. How you would go about doing that, is something that I don't know. Stay out of the high crime areas, as that's just asking for trouble. If you need employment, be very sure that you have it before you come.

And, above all, recognize the fact that Savannah is much, much more than the Historic District. All kinds of people with all sorts of mixtures and skin coloring live here happily. But no one can say for sure if you will find a spot that will suit you.

Think long and hard about moving for personal reasons. The chances are that you could work things out where you are among friends and in familar places better than you could among total strangers. Our problems tend to follow us wherever we go.

Now, if that sounds like a lecture from your grandmother, I'm sorry! But, I must honestly tell you how it seems to me.

Thank you! No problems in life except I get to make a major move now that my girls are basically grown up. The one coming with me is starting college very soon. My eldest is away at college already. Their dad remains in our town here in Cali so they have him and that point of reference. This is all for me. Don't need to worry about schools, play dates for the kids, etc.

Thank you for all your pointers! I appreciate them!

[ellie]

I'm guessing you want to live on Tybee because that's where "they say" other lesbians live? Or do you just like the beach?

You'll be fine. There are people from everywhere living here.

[notswedish]

Originally Posted by atlantagreg30127

Savannah definately has it's funky side and it's not exactly Mayberry, either. So hopefully people can steer you toward the funkiness side of it all and avoid any pockets of "Deliverance". Good luck with your move.

OMG - I am hearing banjo music now!!!

I am actually Black too! Does that add to the equation? I am about done with raising my girls in the "daily" sense. The one coming with me is about to start planning college. I am planning to go back to school to get my masters degree. That's the sinister plot!

I lived in Oakland CA for YEARS and most people outside of the Bay Area thought I was a nut case. I LOVED it! I remember the year when they were counting murders daily on the news and a good friend's son was #72. The crime and drugs were just not in the places I lived. You just know not to be in certain parts of that sprawling town. It was a hop skip and jump into to San Francisco and just a very cool place to live. Black people were doing very well there and living in all the best neighborhoods in multi-million dollar homes, etc.

Keep in mind that Cali is a conservative state with conservative politics outside of major liberal areas like the Bay Area and LA. Of course, everyone lives amongst each other. MOST of Cali, I would NOT live in. Keep in mind that this a newer state and a huge majority of people are from somewhere else.

Where I live NOW is totally conservative. The outrage over the "landmark decision to let lgbtq people marry" is palpable to people in my town. Let's be clear, even in this Bay Area, my life is NOT the norm.

So, all of this is to say that most places are gonna be a culture shock when making a major move. I fell in love with the Savannah area a few years back and have family close by (although they are not close family and I don't anticipate seeing them often). It's a leap of faith for a middle-aged woman who has spent her life raising great kids, being a soccer (well, basketball really) mom, taking care of everyone else.

I really appreciate the response!!!

[ellie]

So what are you worried about? Hardly anyone's life is the norm. Even married people with kids only make up about 25% of the population. That's not the majority.

What makes Savannah special is that there seems to be a fair amount of tolerance for many kinds of people, especially if you're nice and aren't pushy or preachy about your lifestyle choices.

[bgnzsavnh]

OMG - I am hearing banjo music now!!!

They don't call it 'F'ingham' for nothing

[outdoorman]

I too am black, am a Native San Franciscan who moved away some 20+ years ago, lived in Metro Atlanta for last 15 yrs and really think you'd have no problems with acceptance there. I havent seen much of Savannah over the past 2 months I've lived in Richmond Hill, but the area seems fairly diverse. I have spent alot of time in the North Georgia mountains and bordering NC/TN-fishing,kayaking,camping,hiking and hunting and feel as comfortable there as I did exploring Northern California back in the day.

[Padgett2]

I just thought of something. Unless you just really want to be near the coast, Decatur Ga. might be exactly what you are looking for. You would be near Emory University, and other colleges/universities too. This might be great for both your plans and your daughter's. Decatur also seems to be a gathering place for the lesbian/gay life style. It's part of the Atlanta area. The weather is colder than Savannah during the winter, but not as hot for so long in the summer.

I think that in Decatur, you would be less likely to accidently move into a neighborhood that would not accept you well. I hate to say it, but there are those spots in Savannah......there are even spots that don't accept ANY newcomer if he or she hasn't lived here all their life.

Having said that, I love Savannah, even with all it's warts. You couldn't pay me to live anywhere else!