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Old 09-06-2009, 03:19 PM
 
Location: Universal City, Texas
3,109 posts, read 8,508,379 times
Reputation: 1772

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Science Reveals Heaviest Element Ever DiscoveredResearch has led to the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science.The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of312.These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which aresurrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. SinceGovernmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected,because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A tinyamount of Governmentium can cause a reaction normally taking less than asecond, to take from four days to four years to complete.Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2-6 years. It does not decay, but undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons anddeputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium'smass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will causemore morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes, not to mention multipleoxymorons.This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe thatGovernmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. Thathypothetical quantity might normally be called"critical mass" but, in this unique case it is known as"critical mess".When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium (Am), anotherjust-discovered element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentiumsince it has half as many peons but twice as many morons. Author
unknown
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Old 09-06-2009, 04:05 PM
 
Location: Universal City, Texas
3,109 posts, read 8,508,379 times
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Probably belongs in the politics section, but I thought it was funny and I wanted to share with you. It's true, regardless of which party is in power, Governmentium just grows and grows.
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Old 09-06-2009, 04:25 PM
 
Location: Bellingham, WA
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In fact, I believe it is the heaviest elemental inert gas in existence.
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Old 09-06-2009, 04:51 PM
 
4,986 posts, read 7,762,252 times
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I understand this element is very unstable and subject to self-implosion after absorbing massive amounts of gold particles which causes it to disappear. You'd think that'd be the end of it. Mysteriously though, a brand new, nearly identical particle seems to replace it almost instantly, and the process starts all over again. Scientists all over the world are trying to determine of there's any way to harness its energy.
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Old 09-06-2009, 04:53 PM
 
Location: Universal City, Texas
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It would be nice if we could figure an economic use for it.
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Old 09-06-2009, 05:36 PM
 
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It was thought there might be some economic uses for it, but it's extremely hard to find. Most of the time it only leaves traces that can be detected in your wallet that proves its existence.
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Old 09-06-2009, 05:43 PM
 
Location: Universal City, Texas
3,109 posts, read 8,508,379 times
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Is that what that black mole was in my wallet?
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Old 09-06-2009, 06:08 PM
 
4,986 posts, read 7,762,252 times
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I don't think that could be it. You can only see the results of it after its insatible appetite has entirely consumed the contents. There have been rumors the particle has been seen, but I don't see how that's possible. The after effects only leave a void. It's suspected the particle, along with the contents, may vanish into some unknown dimension.
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Old 09-08-2009, 04:28 PM
 
Location: On the "Left Coast", somewhere in "the Land of Fruits & Nuts"
8,367 posts, read 8,272,491 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gy2020 View Post
Science Reveals Heaviest Element Ever DiscoveredResearch has led to the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science.The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of312.These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which aresurrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. SinceGovernmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected,because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A tinyamount of Governmentium can cause a reaction normally taking less than asecond, to take from four days to four years to complete.Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2-6 years. It does not decay, but undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons anddeputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium'smass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will causemore morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes, not to mention multipleoxymorons.This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe thatGovernmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. Thathypothetical quantity might normally be called"critical mass" but, in this unique case it is known as"critical mess".When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium (Am), anotherjust-discovered element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentiumsince it has half as many peons but twice as many morons. Author
unknown
Interesting info., and coincidentally comes right on the heels of that new discovery re: the famous Dark Matter suggested by quantum mechanics, which turns out to be an Anti-Matter version of Governmentium! Although this particular form of anti-matter is only held together by the attraction of a few morons, most of its mass is actually due to its huge number of peons, which all blindly follow the orbits of the few morons. This unique atomic structure gives it great destructive potential, while paradoxically being extremely resistant to change. Scientists are calling this new discovery, RightWingium, although so far it's been difficult to accurately observe, owing to its volatility and extremely uncertain half-life.
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