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Old 12-28-2011, 08:01 AM
 
11 posts, read 25,768 times
Reputation: 19

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I am an African-American female,I am interested in moving to Seattle. I'm interested in the what the dating scene is like because I'm single and I like to have fun with that. I have dated or have been involved with in one way or another with men of a different ethnicity than my own, so I don't really mind if Seattle is majority white. That's not at all a problem for me, personally.

I know it's a broad question, but what I want to get a feel for is what the nightlife, entertainment/leisure is like there...and what about the job market?

I've also had my eye on Portland, it always seemed like a quirky, liberal type place, does anyone have any insight as to the perks and downsides of both?

I'm 22 btw...
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Old 12-28-2011, 01:09 PM
 
5,615 posts, read 6,631,090 times
Reputation: 4696
Portland's economy is way worse off than Seattle. You're more likely to find a job in Seattle. Seattle has more diversity than PDX and is more interesting, more international, more cosmopolitan presence than PDX. Oregon has no sales tax, but a high income tax. Washington has no income tax but has a high sales tax-- Pick your poison.
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Old 12-28-2011, 01:30 PM
 
24 posts, read 31,964 times
Reputation: 47
I live in the Puget Sound area (Seattle area, for you out-of-towners). The entire Pacific Northwest, in general, is overwhelmingly white and in some areas white and Asian. That should not be much of concern to pigmented folks except that racial intolerance is very hidden and insidious here. It's very unlikely someone will call you the "N" word to your face in Seattle because Seattlelites are known for their politeness. However, over time you will begin to notice a distinct class discrepancy between blacks and whites -- how they live, where they live, and where they work.

I don't know where you are from caprigirl12, but I moved here from the Northeast -- the Boston area to be exact -- where it's very likely you will encounter many more well educated, uppity, middle class blacks than the national average. Not so much the case in Seattle. There are very intelligent, middle-class blacks in Seattle, but because most white people's interaction with Seattle blacks are limited to those who come from distinct pockets of lower income and segregated areas such as the Central District or Tacoma, there is the perception that most blacks are ghetto. Now, having grown up in one of the wealthiest areas of New England where I was afforded a great education, I do tend to wear the air of confidence that comes with that privilege. Seattlelites hate pride and confidence in black people. They don't know what to do with it, so they will make every attempt to derail your intelligence, your confidence, your directness. If you are going to move here, as a black person, you must learn to walk with humility or you will be ostracized on contact. Seattle is mentally a small city that leans towards high-school clickishness, so ostracism here has long-reaching repercussions. These same rules do not apply to white people in Seattle, as they can be as uppity as they please, as their entitlement is not your entitlement.

That said. It is very challenging for an African-American girl to date in Seattle unless you are a quadroon, biracial, look like Beyonce or are foreign black such as Ethiopian or Eritrean. The white males here are scared to death of American black women. There are a few white males that will go for African-American females, but those that do will more likely prefer foreign-accented African females as they are exotic and thus more acceptable to have around their white friends and family.

Let me break down the racial dating scene for you in order of preference and frequency. White male with white female. White male with Asian female. Black male with white female. Asian male with Asian female. African male with African female. African-American female with Self.

Like you, I too have had the experience of dating inter-racially and, especially inter-ethnically, and have no qualms about it. In fact, I love it. But moving to Seattle as a black female - and a beautiful one at that - has stifled nearly all dating opportunities. You will likely end up mainly getting hit upon by the lowest class black males (they are the most forward) and consummately-opportunistic low-class white males. You will likely lower your standards just to be with a man and once you are sick of that will chose to not date at all.

You could do OK here if you have the character to ignore obstacles, but I would advice you to find a more diverse place to hang your hat.
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Old 12-28-2011, 02:15 PM
 
3,082 posts, read 2,449,834 times
Reputation: 2103
Seattlelites hate pride and confidence in black people. They don't know what to do with it, so they will make every attempt to derail your intelligence, your confidence, your directness. If you are going to move here, as a black person, you must learn to walk with humility or you will be ostracized on contact.

I normally skip over this type of comment or post, but this is ridiculous. It's not true and I don't know anyone like that.

OP, there are good reasons to choose Portland or Seattle but they are only three hours away from each other. I would strongly recommend you spend a day or two in each and decide for yourself because they have very different "vibes". I knew the day we arrived in Portland it was not for us and I knew the day we arrived in Seattle it was. I've known people who felt the exact opposite about each city. You should take a look at each since they are so close together. Good luck!
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Old 12-28-2011, 02:30 PM
 
Location: South Whidbey Island
1,776 posts, read 1,566,626 times
Reputation: 1935
I like to read a lot of the different forums on CD. Believe it or not, you can see a pronounced difference in the "collective personality" between some of the forums. The Seattle forum probably has some of the most negative posters in all of CD. Not everyone of course, but enough.

OP, please take that into consideration. A lot of people here tend to describe things in an "over the top" manner. Here is a fictitious story to better explain this:

Two men, one from Anchorage and one from Seattle went on a 2-day fishing/camping trip. The first day was drizzly. The restrooms in the campground were out of service. On the second day a bear was observed walking through the campground. This is how the two men would describe their camping trip:

The guy from Alaska writes in the Alaska forums: Hey guys, I just got back from a nice camping trip. It was a little drizzly the first day but we still had a great time. We woke up in the morning and saw a black bear wandering about. That was cool. I took plenty of pictures.

The guy from Seattle writes in the Seattle forums: Hey guys, I just went on one of the worst camping trips I've ever been on. On our first day it did nothing but rain. It was terrible. No sun at all. Instead of going on a nice hike I was wishing I had brought my SAD therapy lamp. The rain really got to me. Of course, the restrooms were also out of service. In the middle of the night I had to risk life and limb walking into the edge of the woods to relieve myself. We got up the next day and found a black bear prowling through the campground. I can't believe they allow bears to wander through the campgrounds. Seems pretty reckless if you ask me.

OK, I'm not a storyteller. I do believe however, that this depicts the "mindset" of the Seattle forum. Not everyone. There are a lot of really helpful and straight talking people posting here. Unfortunately, there are also a lot of people who seemed to major in drama.
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Old 12-28-2011, 04:47 PM
 
Location: Capital Hill
1,603 posts, read 1,479,468 times
Reputation: 783
Quote:
Originally Posted by Inkpoe View Post
Portland's economy is way worse off than Seattle. You're more likely to find a job in Seattle. Seattle has more diversity than PDX and is more interesting, more international, more cosmopolitan presence than PDX. Oregon has no sales tax, but a high income tax. Washington has no income tax but has a high sales tax-- Pick your poison.
'Pick your poison': That says it all.
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Old 12-28-2011, 05:47 PM
 
11 posts, read 25,768 times
Reputation: 19
Thanks Caraway!
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Old 12-28-2011, 07:00 PM
 
Location: US Empire, Pac NW
5,012 posts, read 6,562,624 times
Reputation: 4125
I don't know where "The (Angsty) Furious" is coming from, but if I were still dating, and you were hot, I'd date you. White, educated male from the Midwest here. And I know a few others who are in the same boat as I used to be. So I know you have a shot.

The white male / asian female dating is more often seen because there's more "asian" (typically meant to mean far-east asiatic as "asian" covers about half the world's population and covers 65% of the landmass and most of the human race's ethnic types, excepting Africa, which is the most diverse) people out here. So I wouldn't put much stock in pure numbers.

Though I could be wrong. I didn't have the same experiences as Furiousness there.
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Old 12-28-2011, 07:01 PM
 
Location: Downtown Seattle
279 posts, read 309,593 times
Reputation: 173
Quote:
Originally Posted by Inkpoe View Post
Portland's economy is way worse off than Seattle. You're more likely to find a job in Seattle. Seattle has more diversity than PDX and is more interesting, more international, more cosmopolitan presence than PDX. Oregon has no sales tax, but a high income tax. Washington has no income tax but has a high sales tax-- Pick your poison.
I agree with everything you said. Portland is a nice city but there is not as much career opportunity or cosmopolitan culture there as there is in the emerald city!
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Old 12-28-2011, 07:51 PM
 
24 posts, read 31,964 times
Reputation: 47
Listen folks. There are many positives about living in Seattle, but dating as a black female is not one of them. I happen to love White-American men and have dated a gazillion of them in the Northeast. I happen to think they make great life partners, overall, compared to some of the other ethnicities I've been with. Granted, making generalizations is not fair, but that has been my personal experience. I've also dated middle-Eastern, African-American, Persian, Asian, European and Latino. I never had a problem attracting any man back East as I've been described as having quite the "banging" body and a beautiful face; then add intelligence to that equation. Maybe it's the culture here where the men are not as forward or aggressive as East-Coast men. Who can say. But for those of you who get indignant with offense, all you have to do is take stock of your "diverse" set friends and see that my assessment of preference and frequency of dating in Seattle is right on the mark (White male with white female. White male with Asian female. Black male with white female. Asian male with Asian female. African male with African female. African-American female with Self). This is just the reality. Seattlelites like to describe the city as being diverse, but it's diversity is quite limited compared to other truly cosmopolitan cities like New York and Los Angeles. Now, because you are 22, you will likely have exposure to a younger, more open-minded generation and may not have any problems meeting men at all, regardless of race and ethnicity. However, if you are in your late 30's and up, good luck sistah. The pickins are slim. I moved here three years ago and I'm quite fed up with the scene in Seattle. Add to my non-existing sex life, the constant drum of rain, gray skies, and relentless ingestion of vitamin D overdoses, you are looking at a woman on the verge of a nervous breakdown. I pray, every day, to meet a decent man that can accept me, regardless of my phenotype because I don't want to turn into one of those women that adopt a houseful of cats for companionship. I know a lot of other single African-American women who complain about the exact same issue. They end up either leaving the state out of frustration or will throw themselves head first into their careers or pursue an advanced degree as a distraction. I'm making an appeal to all you males, but White male honeys in particular since you are the dominant group. If you see a sistah that you like, for Pete's sake, ask us out. Black girls need love too.
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