Official "Seattle Freeze" Discussion Thread (Bellevue, Vashon: appointed, townhomes)

[ladyjuliek]

Originally Posted by toughguy

Why are you so hung up on this? It was an isolated incident which could have happened anywhere. You can't extrapolate an entire metropolis' sense of humor from one random comment on the news. Like jenbar said...c'mon......

Not hung up on it, obviously - but I was strangely mystified why there was no response whatsoever. I just put the comment in the appropriate thread once it was made. Sheesh. Does everyone jump down your back for asking something twice there, if it went ignored before? W/E.

[ness]

I think my DH is a Seattle native at heart. He is a naturally more reserved person. He is super polite with people at work, etc. but he doesn't really feel the need to cultivate new friendships. In fact, he gets annoyed if I do (and expect him to join) because he says he has enough friends and wants to reserve his free time for them.

We already have friends in WA, so I don't think this would be a problem for us.......but I can see how someone moving by themselves to the City would be put-off by the attitude.

MY friends who live in Gig Harbor/Tacoma area who are transplants from Calif. have made quite a few friends of the natives.....and when we visit we have gotten to know them as well. They all seem like really warm wonderful people. Maybe it just takes time. ????

[lucky_bamboo]

When my husband and I first moved to the area, he was in the Navy, so all of our friends were associated with the Navy (which is a very social and friendly community). Once he got out, and we stayed in the area, and our Navy friends eventually got transferred away, we found it hard to make friends at first. But now, we have a solid group of friends that we socialize with, but no really very close friends. I think that in general, the atmosphere here is just reserved, not necessarily unfriendly. And it stays that way even as new people move in the area, because it feeds upon itself. It’s just easier to be reserved and anti-social, and newcomers fall into the habit quickly. It takes effort to put yourself out there and face rejection. I think people here are very nice, and there are a lot of people worth the effort to meet and get to know – it’s just that it will take more effort and time than in other places. One surefire way to never make any friends is to have the attitude that "everyone here is unfriendly".

[Rage]

As a person who is GOING to be coming to Seattle I have read about the "Seattle freeze", the dood who is moving because of the social indifference, the stand offish nature of Seattlites......ya da ya da ya da.

And in contrast I see all of the people here who are posting sincere and helpful comments, reserved of judgement and extending a thoughtful nod to those who seem to find the area so climatically and socially cold.

To my bewilderment, I wonder, is it the forum itself which lends this air of support and comradery whilst so cozily snuggled behind the screen of safety and anonymity without having to extend the "physical" hand of friendship. Or indeed is it that the very nature of the people in this fine city are truely gregarious and it more a matter of the lack of opportunity and intellectual exchange that prevents a more positive theme to emerge.

One would have to agree that there is a diametric opposition to what is "said" and what is presented here.

I told you it blew my mind.........................

[41Willys]

I feel the whole Seattle Freeze thing is really sad.

[ness]

Originally Posted by 41Willys

I feel the whole Seattle Freeze thing is really sad.

Sad that it exists? or sad that people think it exists and have written articles about it?

[41Willys]

Originally Posted by ness

Sad that it exists? or sad that people think it exists and have written articles about it?

That it exists. Ive seen some huge growth spurts in different parts of the country, but, Seattle is one place I think they are ruining.

Is the freeze more from transplants?

[pwright1]

This freeze stuff is ridiculous. I find people here outgoing, friendly, positive and real which is what I like. Since moving here my social life is great. I through parties quite often and many come and vice versa. Its not all about parties though. But really, overall I see no Seattle freeze. My neighbors are all cool except for one and she happens to be the only native.

[scirocco22]

Me neither, I'm not buying into it. Like I've said all along, I don't remember it being anywhere the way it's being described when I think back 30 or 40 years ago in Seattle.

[HockeyMac18]

Originally Posted by scirocco22

Me neither, I'm not buying into it. Like I've said all along, I don't remember it being anywhere the way it's being described when I think back 30 or 40 years ago in Seattle.

I do wonder sometimes why Seattle gets singled out so often. I'm not saying that some phenomenon that is described by people on these forums/in the newspapers doesn't exist (because after all, there is something going on if they feel the need to write an article about it)...but reading/listening to the descriptions of this "freeze", I really don't see anything about this behavior that is that drastically different from the behavior of people in most other Northern cities (probably with the exception of Manhattan and some other cities on the East Coast known for their loud...ness (is that a word?)).

In my visits to Seattle, I've never experienced anything that would catch my attention as being extremely out of the ordinary in terms of personalities...but then again, I'm from the North, and it might just be something I'm used to and/or I would have to live somewhere with a vastly different culture to notice it. I am by no means claiming to be an expert on this subject (so please shut me down if I'm way off on anything here...I won't be hurt if you call me out on anything)...so, please don't view me as an expert in Seattle culture.

But, what I do know is that the behaviors that people tend to describe as being associated with the Seattle "freeze" (reserved, want to stay indoors in the winter on the computer, reluctant to make many friends outside of a solid circle of friends, etc) aren't exactly, in my eyes, unique to that city in any way. I'm not trying to say whether I think this is behavior is "good" or "bad"; I just think Seattle gets unfairly singled out regarding this topic.

As an aside, there is a trend I sometimes see on these boards: Seattle being singled out as the worst place to live (whether it be related to weather or the "freeze"). Sure, it's never directly said in such a way, but it's often implied (whether it be on purpose or not). The reality, on the other hand, is that there are many places that have similarly dreary winters and similarly reserved/introverted personalities throughout the population...And so, I wonder then: why does Seattle get singled out so often (and I don't just mean on these boards...it's just popular belief (sometimes fueled by ignorance) that it rains/is cloudy every single day in Seattle, when of course this isn't totally true)? I'm not trying to start any arguments/flame wars: I'm genuinely curious.

I do want to make it clear that I'm not trying to belittle people's bad experiences in Seattle (because I do feel awful for people that are just downright unhappy there), nor am I trying to say you're "wrong" for feeling unhappy there (I'm sorry if this is how I come off...it's sincerely not my intention). I'm also certainly not trying to paint a picture of a city that doesn't exist because people deserve to know the truth about a place they're considering moving to for the rest of their lives (I definitely believe in truth...which, when you think about it, is what my whole rant is really about)...

But at the same time I do enjoy some perspective in respect to the rest of the country, and so I wonder: what is it about Seattle that, despite it's not-so-unique characteristics when compared to other notable Northern cities, makes it stand out? Is it because there are so many transplants there? Or is it because many of these transplants come from places that are drastically different in both culture and weather? Or is it because this opinion (that Seattle is downright depressing and unfriendly) is pervasive within the culture and, whether it's true or not, people fall into these patterns because it's easy to do so? Could it be kind of like when a sports team thinks it's cursed and can't win (Cubs are a good example of this)? I know that analogy is kind of out-there...but what I mean is, even though there's no rational reason they can't win, the belief that a curse exists "gets in their heads" and adversely affects their behavior (possibly preventing them from playing as well as they could and causing them to lose). Is something like this occurring?...Or Is it a combination of everything I described? These aren't rhetorical questions...I really don't know. Like I said, I'm genuinely curious and I would enjoy discussions on this. But...I'm really straying off topic, and I apologize... as such I'll shut up about this now.

On topic: I've always felt that winters in general make people more reserved and introverted; but despite this I do feel "people are people"...meaning no matter where you are, you're always going to get reserved people and you're always going to get outgoing people (our genetics have to play some role in our personality, ya know...). The percentages of these types of personalities may vary depending on location, but I do feel no matter where you are, or no matter how reserved you feel a place is, you can always find someone outgoing and willing to make new friends. At least, that has been my experience in my short life. I'm sure others would disagree...this is just my opinion after all. What do you all think? Thanks for reading