Official "Seattle Freeze" Discussion Thread (Bellevue, Bothell: fit in, neighborhood)

[leyden]

Just moved here from the Midwest ( 1st 34 yrs. in Southwestern Michigan [ miss the lake in summertime ] and the next 18 yrs in East Central Illinois )

In my limited experience ( so far ) it seems like the legend is true ( if I have this understanding correct - "warm politeness, but 'dry ice' cold underneath" ?!)

One ( 2yr ?) transplant actually said: " ...you're not from here, are you? I can tell 'cause you're talking to me" !!!

- steady breeze, and calm seas -

[leyden]

"We have found the enemy - and it is us"

Some one suggested the only thing to do about this situation ( if it exists - BTW you 'old timers', when was the last time you let someone 'new' into your ring of 'more that aquaintances?) was accept it or move. In the article cited at the (almost) begining of this thread, a 'Space City Mixer' was mentioned, maybe we just need more of the same and/or some how make it 'un-cool' to NOT have new ( additional ) friends.

To be semi-fair, the small town in Illinois that I just left seemed to have a similar problem , but they weren't quite as 'nice' up front. The attitude there seemed to be " if we didn't go to the same high school ( xx years ago !! ), then we can't be friends......

[findingmesomeday]

Wow. You guys should spend some time in Boston.

I'm from the East Coast (not Boston, though I went to college here). My husband is an Oregon native. I lived in Portland for 4 years, Seattle for 8 years. I definitely got the "Portland freeze" before I met my husband. After that, the world opened up. I never encountered a Seattle freeze but maybe that's because hubby is a PNW native?

We've lived in New England for 10 years. He HATES, HATES, HATES it here. He hates the way he feels people look right through you unless you can trace your roots back to the Mayflower. Or work for Fidelity and make $500K /yr and live in a $3MM home. It's very cliquish. Here I'm more accepted than he is because I have somewhat of a "pedigree" in that my college degree is local. He's looked at as though he has 2 heads. We've been trying to get out for 4 years but now that our oldest is in 11th grade, we fear we might be here for a bit longer. We thought we were going to land an opportunity in Raleigh (better than here!) but it fell through.

At this point, I'm ready to load kids and household into a Uhaul and move in with my mother in law in Oregon. THAT'S how desperate I am to escape the friendly NE environment!

[cobolt]

No, it isn't the "gray" that makes Seattle "freeze." Try visiting SE Alaska--Ketchikan, Juneau, Haines, etc. Locals are friendly---invite you over to eat friendly. And I'm not just talking about during tourist season. I'm talking about living in the community year round and feeling that warmth. And SE Alaska beats Seattle and the Pac NW in rainfall and gray days hands down. Maybe the gray and weather give materialistic people something more to crank about, but it isn't the weather.

[ness]

I've spent quite a bit of time back east and I know what you're talking about. I think the people are friendly, but only really friendly if you meet their education, breeding, etc. standards. I think traditional education isn't placed on such a high pedestal in So Cal or probably the PNW. Here if someone says they went to Harvard....we say WOW! How are you managing those student loans. lol. I'm laughing thinking about the Bachelor going to visit one of the girls' families in Washington DC and them being very "disappointed" that he was a Texas Millionaire who didn't finish college and owns three bars. = )

[pwright1]

No name mentioning but those very people on here say there is a freeze are some of the same people who wish to come home and not talk to neighbors, 'no need for small talk over the fence' 'not interested in meeting neighbors', 'I don't know my neighbors names and don't care to know'. This is the kind of behavior that I call FREEZE & STRANGE. I just thank the lord that I'm not this way and that I don't have neighbors like this.

[41Willys]

Originally Posted by NChomesomeday

Wow. You guys should spend some time in Boston.

I'm from the East Coast (not Boston, though I went to college here). My husband is an Oregon native. I lived in Portland for 4 years, Seattle for 8 years. I definitely got the "Portland freeze" before I met my husband. After that, the world opened up. I never encountered a Seattle freeze but maybe that's because hubby is a PNW native?

We've lived in New England for 10 years. He HATES, HATES, HATES it here. He hates the way he feels people look right through you unless you can trace your roots back to the Mayflower. Or work for Fidelity and make $500K /yr and live in a $3MM home. It's very cliquish. Here I'm more accepted than he is because I have somewhat of a "pedigree" in that my college degree is local. He's looked at as though he has 2 heads. We've been trying to get out for 4 years but now that our oldest is in 11th grade, we fear we might be here for a bit longer. We thought we were going to land an opportunity in Raleigh (better than here!) but it fell through.

At this point, I'm ready to load kids and household into a Uhaul and move in with my mother in law in Oregon. THAT'S how desperate I am to escape the friendly NE environment!

AMEN! Can I come?

[hunter_mom]

I'm moving out to Seattle from New York in one week (wow!) and I've got to say that while I've been preparing for this move the last few months, every single person I've met or spoken to has been nothing but friendly and helpful. The one time I was out to visit, I found got the same reaction from people. While I was really hesistant about agreeing to the move (hubby got a new job in Bellevue), I'm actually looking forward to it now. We're moving into a new development and all of the neighbors we've met (my husbands been out there for 2 months already) have been extremely friendly. Maybe it's because there are so many transplants? I don't know. I'm just hoping to find that the "Seattle Freeze" doesn't really exist for us.

[41Willys]

Where about in NY?

[cobolt]

Sure you're going to meet "Friendly" people. It's trying to make meaningful connections that will have you stumped after you move out here. YOU will be the one initiating get togethers all the time. YOU will be the one reaching out. It won't work the other way. A one-sided relationship gets really old really quick. Sure you met nice people and neighbors. Most people do when they "visit." Living the in and out of the day every day is a different animal altogether. Good luck