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04-02-2007, 03:04 PM
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The question is not, "Can the word be used in a hateful manner". Of course it can. In your case it probably was. The question is, "Is the word always used in a hateful manner". I think most people would say yes, and I would disagree.
I disagree because, like I said, the word has been used somewhat frequently around me. Not day-to-day, but on occasion with certain people. Most white southerners who use the term aren't referring to the black race as a whole, but rather a specific black person that they don't like. Or it can also be used to describe a group of black people that they don't like. There is a saying: "There's a big difference between a black person and a n*****" If the word is meant to convey hatred toward all black people, then what is the meaning of that statement?
Think about the word "redneck". Redneck is popularly accepted to be a less inflammatory word than "the n word" - but nonetheless, people who use it aren't referring to the white race as a whole. Rather, they are referring to a specific group within the white race that they don't like. And while the word certainly carries a denigrating and insulting meaning, I wouldn't call it hate.
Eventually you begin to split hairs over what defines "hatred" - but a general rule of thumb is that "the N word" is used among (some, not all) white southerners in a manner exactly like the word "redneck" is used among mainstream americans. To contrast, jack, take the situations you've been in, switch the races around, and substitute "redneck" for "the n word". Could it be used for hatred and intimidation? Is it always, in all circumstances?
Just to be clear, I'm not saying that you should tolerate it, and I'm not saying that it's a word that anyone should use. I personally don't use it. I understand that this is a very controversial position to take on an offensive and controversial topic. But.. I'm only offering insight into those who use the word candidly, around me, who wouldn't use it in public. I'm willing to have an intelligent, civil discussion about this - mainly because it is a taboo subject, that no one will ever discuss - but I am not going to participate in a flamewar.
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04-02-2007, 04:42 PM
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Junior Member
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Join Date: Apr 2007
1 posts, read 1,845 times
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I am one of those people who agree with your HUGE MISTAKE.
I just left South Carolina. There is no way I could recommend the state to anyone - and I say that as a Southerner (Virginia) but I suggest you balance my opinion out with other responses on this forum.
Lived in North Carolina and that was very nice, very progressive. But when we moved to South Carolina, I felt like I was going third world.
Spent twelve long years there... six in Charleston, six in Columbia, and kept on hanging on, thinking that if we just stayed maybe a little longer and tried a little harder, the next month might bring new opportunities. But there comes a point where you have to throw in the towel and move on.
Columbia SC is the worst place I have ever lived. Worked in three hospitals there and in all of them, I have never worked for such a motley assortment of incompetent, good ole-boy managers and co-workers in such a mediocre, nonprogressive city in my life. To its credit, one can buy a lot of house for very little there, but a nice house without a good job in a backwards town isn't saying much.
Its not just me. We would often meet people who moved there from out of state and almost to a man or woman, they felt they had made a big mistake.
The issue is that if you aren't a part of the good ole boy network - i.e, the right skin color and having lived in the same place all your life and worked for the same place for 20 years, you were viewed with suspicion and opportunities to advance were denied. I have never seen anything like it. I never worked in a South Carolina hospital that didn't remind me of places I worked at in the 1970's but socially, the place is like something out of the 50's or 60's. At it's least, the place comes off as kitschy. At its worst, life there was downright racist and xenophobic.
Schools are below average in most of the state.
Academic life and the arts are virtually nonexistent in the midlands/Columbia area.
Healthcare is below par everywhere I worked. Obesity is a big issue in the state.
There ARE some bright spots in South Carolina. Lots of people retire in Myrtle Beach and if golf is your thing, it can be a good place. Some like Charleston, Mount Pleasant, or Summerville. Some people like the western part of the state up around Clemson.
But so far as the midlands - the Columbia area - well, I have never before lived in a place where people seemed proud to be merely average.
I headed back up Virginia-way around a year and a half ago and every day I thank God for leading me out of South Carolina.
I know I'm speaking very strongly and generally but I say this as a Southerner and a man who is proud to be one. North Carolina is a good place to relocate to, and so is Georgia in some spots. But if you consider relocating to South Carolina, I suggest you rent for maybe six months before you buy...
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04-02-2007, 05:55 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2007
11 posts, read 15,133 times
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I Sooooo Agree!!!!!!!
Quote:
Originally Posted by chitownguy
I moved to the Summerville area 2 years ago from Illinois (Northern suburbs of Chicago) - and can't wait to get out of here!! In the process of listing the house. My wife & I had thought that moving someplace w/ a lower cost of living would be a GREAT idea. Boy, were we wrong, because along w/ a lower cost of living comes LOWER PAYCHECKS!
Both my neighbors on either side of my house are from out of state, one from Michigan, one from Florida. They are BOTH looking to get out, too! It appears that many ppl move here from other areas for a couple of years, like it for a while, and then realize South Carolina isn't what they imagined!! The schools are the worst, crime is rampant, and the weather isn't that much better. This past summer was H-O-T. The winter is bitter and cold (and I'm from Illinois!). Not only that, but everyone around here is still STUCK in the Civil War. What's up w/ THAT???
South Carolina is a GREAT place to vacation, see the sights, go to the beach. Living here.....not so great. We are sooooo outta here!!!!
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I do not like it here either. I am from Peoria, Illinois and I hate Florence, South Carolina. The people here are weird and freakishly religous. We moved here because of my fiance's job. We have only been here for 3 months and it is hell! I am sooooo glad you are on here. I really need someone to talk to. 
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04-02-2007, 06:05 PM
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Sorry, I hate it here too! Chiguy email me we need to talk!
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04-02-2007, 06:09 PM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: May 2006
2,360 posts
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funny, a good buddy of mine up in Greensboro, NC is from Peoria, Illinois - and he loves it here. Go figure. Of course, what you're talking about has more to do with Florence (and that general area) than it does with the south in general - which I've tried to explain to several people, to no avail.
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04-02-2007, 06:12 PM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Jan 2007
289 posts, read 437,155 times
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Those people who want to go home..go...why do you have to tell everyone about it?? I am sick of hearing peoples problems and the fact that they dont like it here. SO GO!
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04-02-2007, 06:12 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2007
11 posts, read 15,133 times
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I have to agree. I work at a retirement home and I do not think there has been any improvements made to it since then. The knowledge of the arts and things of that nature do not exist! Women are looked down upon here negatively and the opportunities to advance are poor. I hope one day we can get out of here.
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04-02-2007, 06:14 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2007
11 posts, read 15,133 times
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I heard North Carolina is better. I have never been there, so I cannot say.
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04-02-2007, 06:16 PM
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11 posts, read 15,133 times
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I respect your view. But everyone has their own opinion.
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04-02-2007, 06:52 PM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Woodlynne NJ
219 posts, read 256,360 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by chitownguy
I moved to the Summerville area 2 years ago from Illinois (Northern suburbs of Chicago) - and can't wait to get out of here!! In the process of listing the house. My wife & I had thought that moving someplace w/ a lower cost of living would be a GREAT idea. Boy, were we wrong, because along w/ a lower cost of living comes LOWER PAYCHECKS!
Both my neighbors on either side of my house are from out of state, one from Michigan, one from Florida. They are BOTH looking to get out, too! It appears that many ppl move here from other areas for a couple of years, like it for a while, and then realize South Carolina isn't what they imagined!! The schools are the worst, crime is rampant, and the weather isn't that much better. This past summer was H-O-T. The winter is bitter and cold (and I'm from Illinois!). Not only that, but everyone around here is still STUCK in the Civil War. What's up w/ THAT???
South Carolina is a GREAT place to vacation, see the sights, go to the beach. Living here.....not so great. We are sooooo outta here!!!!
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Chitown,
I can only answer for the me and the little woman. We are 63 and plan on moving to NC. We would have chosen SC but it just works financially for us to pick NC.
I can understand the pay scale thing.
Don't know much about the schools other than to say you ain't seen nothing till you lived in New Jersey.
Sooooooooo I guess it is a matter of what school district you are in whatever state you are in.
As for the HOT thing. We hope to be in NC by June and I can't wait for July and August. HOT is why God made air conditioners and even if that breaks down...............well, I'll just sit under a tree with a cold adult beverage.
My brother lives in NC and has this nasty habit of calling me around this time of year when it is 40 degrees here and 70 to 75 down there. I hate my brother.
Anyway, you gotta be where you are happy.
Me and the wife have been visiting SC and NC for years and got to know what to expect.............so we know what we are gonna have.
Best of luck
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