Native Americans in South Dakota (Rapid City, Pine Ridge: how much, home, neighborhood)

[Siletz]

During my visit of Pine Ridge I saw something I still have a hard time believing. In Pine Ridge turn south on highway 87 and in five min you’ll be in Nebraska. Since Pine Ridge is a dry town (alcohol free), the people of Nebraska are kind enough to build liquor stores for the alcoholic Indians. There must have been 6-8 stores just selling alcohol to the Indians from Pine Ridge. A movie was made regarding this problem in Pine Ridge called “Skins” ( www.imdb.com/title/tt0284494/ ), its great movie I highly recommend it.
In some of the early post, some had tried to help family or friends during some rough times. When we started our Casino, majority of our tribal members were lost. They didn’t care and spent what little money they had on beer or drugs. It took at least 10 years for social changes to take effect on the majority. Some, like my parents never took advantage of the opportunities given to them and are still dealing with their addictions. Don’t give up hope; some might take a little longer then others to find their way back home.

[Farouche]

Hello,
I have been away for a few days, and returned to find so many responses that just blew me away.
Melanie, you are an amazing woman and human being! You stayed true to yourself, were strong, and you managed to break free of your painful surroundings and still maintain your connections. You don't sound bitter, either, although I know all of this makes you very sad. How did you do it, when you talk of so many others that could not make it, like your brother?Your stories broke my heart. Thank you for speaking the truth. I know the frustration of loving someone who will not give up the crutch of alcohol.
I lived with someone for eight years whose alcoholism became so deeply entrenched that I realized he would or could not stop drinking. My efforts to help only brought me to a very weak place, until I left to save my sanity.
It's so easy to fall into that codependent stuff when you love someone.
Melanie, how did you manage to hold onto yourself, when you have seen so much suffering around you? And to have had so much responsibility at such a young age... that kind of thing could have easily sent you over the edge.
Did you have some kind of mentor, or friends that you could talk to?
Your strength inspires me.
I agree that something needs to be done for the children. It's just criminal that this neglect goes on in 2006, and the problems are not addressed.
As far as forgetting their culture and roots, I can see how, when a society's underpinnings have been ripped away, traditions can be forgotten. Traditions are built on solid foundations, and when the foundations are no longer there, what is there to hold onto? Therefore, a loss of pride and identity.
Siletz is right to point out the need to invest in the people, and I hope something can be done in that direction to help Pine Ridge. Siletz, you also have overcome a dark past, and your comments moved me.
66.stng and sdgoldpanner, (and of course, Jammie) I loved reading your responses. Goldpanner, you are a wonderful person, and you seem to have really tried to make some changes.
Leserz, I know you aren't trying to be a smart ass. I don't really have any medical skills as yet. I am going to be studying surgical technology. As a single mom, my first priority is to feed my son, but if I ever could be in a position to help Native Americans with my medical skills, I would love to be able to do that.
You all seem like loving, caring individuals, and I wish all of you luck and happiness.

[sdgoldpanner]

I am compelled to describe in detail, what several in the Rapid City community and surrounding area has been working on for the last 8 years to try and bring the Native Americans and the Whites closer together, because something has to be done so we can all finally live in harmony the way it was intended. This is a lengthy explanation, and it will be new to some of you, old hat to others, but if the entire story is not told, those not in the know, will not understand, so bear with me please.
The best way to begin is at the beginning, 8 years ago.
I am a “dreamer”! No I don’t mean sitting around partaking in idle “daydreaming”, I mean I have dreams that propels me into action! I also have a very good Native American friend that also has been blessed with this same calling. Call it a gift, or whatever, but the dreams are like messages, instructing us to do something. Many of the dreams have been fulfilled through action on the part of many others that fell in behind us in our tasks. My friends name is Tom. Tom and I meet weekly in a self cleansing type, call it a meeting of the minds. We have problems like anyone else, and we need an outlet, or someone else to vent through. Our “outlet” was each other in the beginning, and now consists of a small group of very caring individuals. My dream was very real and prompted me to erect a statue for the religious community to draw others together. We are not talking about a measly 10’ statue. The drawings are for an 85’ statue! Wow! The first thought that came to me was “how do I as an individual, accomplish such an enormous task as that”? The answer I received was “with others”! When Tom and I met for our “weekly”, after the dream, he was so excited because he wanted to share a dream he had had. I was absolutely floored, when his dream was nearly identical to mine. The subject in my dream was the Virgin Mary. His subject was Kateri Tekawitha. We both were astounded. “How do you start something like this”, we asked each other! We decided to get some input from well known leaders in the community, religious leaders that is. We talked to many people in the following weeks that turned to months, and two main thoughts we received was a simple “pray about it” and “get others involved”! We have been praying about it ever since, and do to this day, and yes, others are now involved in our plans and strategies. As it was explained to me years ago, the Native Americans look to Kateri Tekawitha for guidance, as the Whites look to the Virgin Mary. Suddenly it became apparent that not one statue was required, but now two, and they had to be holding hands and bonded by love for one another. Now the task became more enormous than first thought. Bringing the two subjects into the picture, also brought together a love for one another, increased prayer, honest trust and a bonding fellowship into our expanding and growing group. There have been many sleepless nights since this small beginning, and countless hours spent, trying to figure out how this should all come together. I mean many sleepless nights! But it is still working! It is surprising how many “ideas” can surface when there are so many people committed to praying about and trying to accomplish something. We have attended several City Commision meetings about our plans, and our biggest “stumbling block” to date, is that “your plans have religious overtones”! Well, duh, surprise me some more! The current Powers in Office don’t know if that can be allowed to happen and it is still a large boulder in our path! Somehow, we have to move those “boulders”, be it prayer, a coming together of people, or what ever is necessary, to take our next step. In the past 8 years, and still counting days, we have managed to line up and secure contractors that are willing to donate much material and time to the completion of this endeavor. The volunteers are standing by, many of them! We have had a donation account set up for many years now, and it is still growing. Not leaps and bounds, but never the less is growing. It is held by Dakota Star Federal Credit Union, and the account name is “Marys Mountain”. We have a parcel of land that is available to us, within the city limits on a hill top, in North Rapid City. Right now we need Prayer! We are counting on all to remember this project. It is a monumental task that can not be accomplished overnight. That has been proven! Should something happen to myself or Tom, before the job is done, there are others waiting in the wing, to carry out this task. This has to be completed one way or another, and I am confident that some day it will become a reality! We need prayer!
We Love You All!

[uncleharley]

There is a lot of good stuff in this thread. Too much to just let it die. I did notice that many people are uncertain what to call the residents of the Pine Ridge Reservation. I might be presumptuous in this statement, but it seems to me that those folks who live there would like to be referred to as the Ogalalla Lakota. At any rate, that is what they call themselves. Of course, if any non-resident did refer to them as the Ogalalla Lakota, they might wonder what that person is up to, but it might be worth a try anyway.

uh

[Farouche]

sdgoldpanner,

I love your dreams, and I know they will come true some day, hopefully soon. Your vision of a double statue- 85' tall!- sounds incredible enough to be a reality one day. If you're going to dream, why not dream big, right? Ironically, I think when we have these kinds of dreams, they're just preposterous enough to come true. People are more likely to help you with such a majestic plan, I think, because it's the type of dream that inspires all. I wish you all the luck! I hope you can get past the religious roadblock and I hope you will let us all know how things are progressing in the future.

uncleharley,

It's nice to hear from you again! I like your idea of calling those from Pine Ridge Lakota. Anyone else have any thoughts on uncleharley's idea?
I agree there have been some amazing responses on this thread. I've learned quite a bit. Good luck to you!

[uncleharley]

Based on what I have read there are many parts to the Ogalalla. I have no real good idea of which to associate with what. My only thought is that it is difficult to know anyone unless you know their name. Perhaps sdgoldpanner could entice his prayer partner to join in and enlighten us. These things are so simple for those who know, but impossible for those don't.

Thank You for the response,

uh

[sdgoldpanner]

Many times I have talked to my partner Tom about this exact thing. His response was simply if one does not know an individual, greet him by "Brother"! I have done this many times and the acceptance is great. There is some kind of trust that presents itself, when the term Brother is used.

[lcb]

I have lived in SD all my life. As a child I went to school with lots of Indians & the school where my children now go to school has many Indian students. My best friend's husband & children are tribal enrolled.
Farouche, if you are seriously considering SD, please do come for a visit. Make it a real visit by checking out a number of areas in our state. We are large geographically & our population is interestlingly diverse as well. As a person in the healthcare field, you will find your skills to be very highly valued here allowing you & your son to enjoy a very comfortable living. You will certainly find wide open spaces, natural beauty, interesting & friendly people with shockingly low housing costs (I was just involved in the sale of a 3-bedroom, move-in ready home built in 1958 for < $20,000). In the small town where I live, people in the healthcare industry are at the upper end of the economic foodchain. If you choose to work on one of the Reservations, you will be handsomly rewarded & will receive the very best equipment available anywhere in the US.
I believe that Jammie is certainly right in the 09/27/06 7:01 post about our friendliness not wearing off. I think you will find us to be fiercely loyal.
I do disagree with Jammie's 10/10/06 8:00 post concerning the casinos. The gambling opportunities are prevalent & we are far from finished cleaning up the greedy fools who will pay a high price for their illegal activities in skimming.
My husband has worked on the reservation w/contractors building those new homes for our Indian polulation. (New homes that do include indoor plumbing, electricity & they can have telephones & internet at greatly reduced prices plus get a cell phone for just $5 per month simply because they are Indians.) The government contract also required the contractors to return to each home a year after completion of that home. What they find is often appalling. During his most recent return trip he was faced with a family that had cut a hole in the bathroom wall so the horse could reach it's head in to drink from the bathtub & another home where the woman complained that she just couldn't stand to be in one particular room because it was always so hot (the electric baseboard heater was on high, apparently since the day it was installed, without anyone caring enough to look or feel for the source of heat or care enough to turn down the dial thermostat on the baseboard heater itself.) Often appliances and fixtures have been removed from the homes to be pawned.
I find myself working with Indian people every day. The firm where I work pays close attention to be certain that each and every person, regardless of race, is treated with the utmost respect and receives justice from the legal system.
A few years ago my husband and I took a young Indian man under our wing. After he graduated from high school, he was involved in the accidental death of a passenger in his car. We both went to bat for him with the Judge. The Judge wanted this young man to take this low point in his life & use it as a springboard to propel him to high heights. Among the conditions of probation set by the Judge, this young man needed to get enrolled in college & mantain only a "C" average (quite do-able for this intelligent young man). We helped him get enrolled in the college of his choice, helped him to get financial aid (did you know that Indian kids can get paid from the tribe in amounts that increase with their grades?) & even helped him to get moved in. Within 2 weeks he was back home. The Judge was lenient and set new probation conditions. In seeing the downward spiral in his home, new probation conditions demanded that he move out of his father's home (he was 20 years old). We helped him to get a job about 20 miles away & got him an appartment. Again, the lure from home with the easy access to liquor & drugs was just too much. We continued to work with this young man for 3 years but he was unwilling to break the cycle. He & one of his brothers are now in prison. The third brother is a fine young man who is a productive member of society with several kids of his own in school (a star on the football team son & a beautiful cheerleader daughter). The Reservation cycle can be broken if the individual desires to.
My post here has been quite rambling & I appologize for that. There is much to be said. Please give our state a try. Visit us in lots of different areas, not just Mt. Rushmore, the Corn Palace or the Great Plains Zoo. Spend a couple of nights in a small town where you'll probably end up in the weekly newspaper just for stopping by.
I began this post with my "credentials" of white living with Indians. I forgot to mention that my own son-in-law is an Indian man whose family has chosen not to be tribal enrolled. Funny how I don't even see the Indian in him at all. You were looking for tolerance, diversity & social justice, weren't you?

[Farouche]

Icb,

Please don't think you were "rambling" in any way. I found your input fascinating and quite valuable. I am seriously considering your advice to come and check out South Dakota, which I may do this summer. I have found all of those who responded on this thread to be people I could consider my friends, and I believe you and Jammie when you both tell me the friendliness of South Dakotans is genuine and lasting. I have checked Internet sites for jobs in my healthcare field (for future reference), but don't seem to see much. Perhaps I'm not looking in the right places. In all other respects- diversity (as you mentioned), people, culture, landscape (wide, open spaces, rolling hills, waterfalls, canyons, buffalo!) weather (hot, hot summers, snowy winters), South Dakota seems ideal.
It's heartbreaking that your young friend could not break away from his addictions, despite all the help you gave him. You really did all that you could do, and you're absolutely correct when you say people ultimately choose whether they want to be helped or not. You can show someone the way, but it's his choice whether he wants to walk in that direction or not. I've been through a similar experience with someone I cared for deeply, and it's so hard not to get too emotionally involved. I finally had to walk away.
Jammie also in an earlier post mentioned that some people on the reservation sell their appliances and fixtures. The horse story is incredible! I had never heard of these stories before, and understand how frustrating that must be to those trying to help.

sdgoldpanner,
I love Tom's response. He's right that the word "brother" elicits an immediate emotional response. I had a friend in an authority position who would often call someone "friend." Most of the time, this got a positive response, but there are always those belligerent souls who will deny such a bond exists, in very loud terms.
I love all of your thoughts and observations on this thread, and you're all making it hard for me not to want to come to South Dakota!

[Jammie]

Well, come on over. You'll be more then welcome here. I wish I could offer you info on jobs in the healthcare field. Nearly every town with a hospital is always looking for healthcare workers. Hopefully someone has a website that could help.