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Old 12-27-2016, 01:27 AM
 
Location: California
242 posts, read 125,310 times
Reputation: 74

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I am SO willing to do this, especially at this point in my life, just to be away from family and still have shelter. And it's $18,000 (last time it was) to lay in bed for 3 months straight. It is study for astronauts to survive in actual space though. And it would provide me IMMEDIATE shelter away from family and be an easy first job (I am aware that laying in bed for 3 months straight could actually be HARD, but if I could get in I would try). I could also get started on life ON MY OWN AFTER JUST THREE MONTHS! And there wouldn't be YELLING AND SCREAMING AND DEPRESSION AND WAITING WEEKS TO MONTHS JUST TO START MAKING MINIMUM WAGE. And I wouldn't have to return home, which is basically admitting I failed at getting into life. I see it as moving backwards.

My mom is bipolar I think, OVERREACTS BAD FREAKING THE HECK OUT! And my family lives right behind my grandparents now, which is an area where jobs are physically available to me (it's in civilization) but my grandparents live right there and are often MONSTERS! At the old house when they visited my grandmother actually (behind my mom's back when she wasn't there) went and took my door's lock off and threatened to call the cops on me and tell them I assaulted her when I put my hand on my doorknob to prevent her from taking it off. (So no privacy pleasuring myself). If I was a parent I'd say you don't parent my kids, I do, don't come into my house and try to take control of my kids and my house! If I keep getting treated like that I am most likely going to hurt someone and go to prison (or just jail?) or hurt myself and die. Or I am going to go and try to rob money to get away immediately, and I will most likely just go o prison for attempting robbery. I can't deal with the controlling ****. And no a job won't be like that, no boss is going to try to take my phone or go to my house and take my door lock off. No job is going to make me do anything other than work that job. They're not going to make nonsense rules like I have to walk everyday, or I'm not allowed to go get food to eat even with my own money that I earned (my mom's parents have authority over her, even without living in the same house).

I'm scared that even if I apply to every place and even call back every day they still won't hire me, because nothing is guaranteed in life and I've had extremely odd bad luck in life, and even wonder if some evil supernatural forces are behind it or something like that. It's like everything in the world is locked away or COMPLETELY HIDDEN from me, yet other people have no problem getting into any of it. I wonder, are other forces at work here, or am I simply uneducated about everything in life (which I am)?

I even looked up to see if I could sell one of my KIDNEYS so I could get into life and on my own IMMEDIATELY! I HATE the idea of getting rid of a part of me (even if I only need one kidney to live) but it could mean not having to suffer without a life for months to a year(s), and all I want is to live RIGHT NOW, as I've wasted enough years. I am an organ donor, but that's if I DIE, because if I'm dead I'll have no use for any of my organs, let someone who needs them have them, if I died right now it'd be like I had to die for someone else to actually have a chance at life, and I guess that'd mean I did have a purpose, and an unselfish purpose.

I only need one kidney anyway, someone else right really need my other one to live. But the stakes are too high for me to give an organ away for free at this point in my life. I'll sell it for maybe a minimum of $50,000 (I'm assuming hospitals buy it, give it to someone, and just remake the money they lost with their high hospital fees).

I don't have the money to fly to another country if that's the only way to get it done legally.

The idea of getting rid of a part of me is EXTREMELY unnerving, but so is not living life. Someone told me they were able to get a job and move out in 5 months, but 5 months is a LONG time, I haven't even been away from my main family for that long!

Most people are ignorant and completely clueless of any ways to make money besides the traditional job, which can take months to get, and then months to year(s)? to financially be able to do what you need to do.

I've NEVER EVEN BEEN DRUNK. I've tried a sip of alcohol maybe 3 times in my life? Or 2. So no alcohol has damaged my kidneys!

I have a feeling some people will think I'm a troll for being willing to sell body organs, but I am not a troll, I just want to live life RIGHT THIS VERY SECOND, I have wasted enough life, I don't want to waste another day.

I realize I'll no longer have a part of my body that I was born with, and I'll never have it again, which is kind of sad, but less sad than not living and enjoying life. And someone else might die without my kidney.

If most people aren't willing to go to these lengths, they must not be too unhappy with life, or they are simply unaware of these opportunities (people fly to other countries for things that are illegal in their home country).

I don't care how common it is for people to live with mommy and/or daddy (who has 2 parents these days?) until their 25 or 30+, I don't want to be part of them. Less life can be lived while still at home, especially with overly dictatorial families.

I'm sick and tired of people telling everyone "Join the military". THEY ARE IGNORANT! They actually say "All you need is to be 18+ and have a high school diploma to join". If that were true I'd already be in. A recruiter told me that taking prescription medication disqualifies me. Also, he said 75-80% of Americans actually don't qualify to join. One guy actually said I must be missing a limb if I can't join. Pure ignorance people have.
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Old 12-27-2016, 07:38 PM
 
510 posts, read 283,058 times
Reputation: 2320
Please don't take this the wrong way, but you will not qualify for the NASA study. They are looking for subjects who are in tip-top shape, physically and mentally, because they want the study results to be applicable to astronauts - who are physically and mentally fit. If they ran the bedrest test with a 400-lbs sedentary person, they are not going to learn much that would help an astronaut.

I am in healthcare, and IMO you need to see a mental health professional. STAT.
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Old 12-27-2016, 10:05 PM
 
Location: California
242 posts, read 125,310 times
Reputation: 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2nccoast View Post
Please don't take this the wrong way, but you will not qualify for the NASA study. They are looking for subjects who are in tip-top shape, physically and mentally, because they want the study results to be applicable to astronauts - who are physically and mentally fit. If they ran the bedrest test with a 400-lbs sedentary person, they are not going to learn much that would help an astronaut.

I am in healthcare, and IMO you need to see a mental health professional. STAT.
I weigh 170 lbs. And although I may need to see a mental health professional, I need a stable living condition/home too, you know, without irrational overreacting and yelling and banging on doors and ****.
Those are triggers, and before someone says get used to it, no, most people do NOT act like that. Most people are NOT that irrational.

I REALLY wish there was a way for me to IMMEDIATELY relocate and get on my own feet quick instead of having to go home and dealing with all the yelling, anger, stress, all the chaos. I just want to disappear again, but reach success this time.

I don't even have $50 to my name.
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