Originally Posted by syracusa
Just wanted to say thank you again for all the advise that has accumulated in this thread.
Many people's arguments here have convinced us to go ahead and disclose the dx to the school.
A few weeks ago, I wrote an extensive e-mail to the principal in which we explained the whole story. She was thankful that we disclosed and said that this will help them meet his needs better. OK. We expected that.
We returned to the US a few days ago and today we enrolled our son in K.
He went through the screening, the teacher who did the screening was excited about him as he apparently responded all questions correctly and completed all tasks she gave him. But then again, when he met the principal, he was kind of off and awkward as usual, not looking her in the eye, not responding when she would say "nice to meet you". When I asked him later about it, he said he's just "shy".
In the meantime, we set up an appointment with the principal + someone from the district to sit down and talk about the whole thing for the first time.
At this point, what should I have with me at the meeting - which will be next week? What are the main things I should ask about? Talk about? Suggest? What should I expect that they will do at this point?
Everything will flow from there - probably a proposal to have him evaluated by the school psychologist?
Or will they wait to see how he does in K first?
Do you think we will be talking about an IEP now?
I don't even know what to expect at this meeting.
I would appreciate it if anyone had any advice for this particular day. Thanks again!
He shouldn't need seen by the school psychologist if he has a diagnosis already. Depending on his needs, he might be scheduled to be seen by the school OT, PT, speech or gifted specialists.
What I would bring is a list of concerns, a list of his strengths, and a list of what you find works well when you teach him or discipline him at home. IOW, things you would like a teacher to know: things that would make her life and Fernando's life easier. If none of that requires outside-the-classroom involvement (i.e., speech therapy, OT, social skills groups, whatever) or special placement, chances are he will not need an IEP but a 504.
I would also bring a legal pad, pens, and possibly a friend who agrees not to open her mouth but will take notes.
I have mixed feelings about both parents attending. Some folks swear by this, but I don't as a rule bring my husband because he's far too easily BSed and doesn't understand jargon nearly as well as I do. In general, it depends on your schedules, your strengths, and how well you work individually or as a unit.
I do bring doughnuts or muffins if it's an early AM meeting. People generally tend to appreciate the gesture, and it sets a congenial tone, particularly if it's a first meeting and you're an unknown quantity.
Helpful hint: when introductions are going on, make a seating diagram on one of your sheets of paper, so you can remember who that weird woman with the glasses and green dress was, later.
One thing I would ask for at this meeting is a conference appointment with Fernando's teacher to discuss and fine-tune how things have gone at the end of the first week of school (maybe second week if school starts on a Wed or Thu, like it does in some districts).
What I would not bring: preconceived attitudes and prejudices.