Help me convince my wife to move to Springfield? (Kansas City: fit in, 2014)

[OneHappyMan]

Dear forum members from Springfield,

I am writing to kindly ask for as many "advise cents" as you could spare - if you do not mind a somewhat longer OP.

I am a physician and a father of two small children. I relocated to Little Rock, AR from Boston few years ago to go under more training. I have been offered a very attractive job in Springfield. It really is my dream job and I have some good friends in the area, but I am having a difficult time convincing my wife to move there. I really want to have her on board and not drag her there against her will. We are in our mid-30s. My wife is a lawyer and was born and raised in NYC. While I was doing my residency we lived in Boston. She loves Boston and really wants us to go back there but the jobs available there are not attractive. This job is significantly better than anything in the east coast (The Springfield job would actually pay significantly more, better hours, more vacation, better working environment, wonderful colleagues).

Ever since we arrived in Little Rock, my wife disliked this place. She is not in love with big cities. In fact, we both love small cities as long as they offer good quality of life. To her a livable city means, great schools and libraries, monuments and museums, pedestrians everywhere, parks and gardens, lively semi-glamorous plazas, boulevards, , nice café to meet with friends and chat over a nice breakfast and Good dining.

We visited Branson during the Thanksgiving and drove to Springfield downtown. In all honesty, the city looked dead but then it was the HOLIDAHY!

My friends say they love raising their kids in Springfield. They have no complains at all. So the other night I convinced my wife to sit and do some research on the city. She came back to me and said, she would not like living in a city where there is no Wholesfood, Trader Jones or Costco. She thinks a good grocery store is the least she would expect from where she lives. She was also pissed off by the private school’s website. She said there was minimal information on their websites so “what would you expect you’d get out of a private school that does not even have a proper website in the year 2014”?
Folks please help me with some good information about the city. As I said my wife has lived in a big city most of her life and likes all the amenities of a larger city: restaurants, culture, diversity,... but I really think Springfield is much better in these departments than she realizes.
Just to give you an idea of things I think she might enjoy, here are a few things I'd like to show her that I think might put Springfield in a positive light:

Good privet schools (my children both will go to pre-school)
Libraries
Restaurants and Cafes (especially ethnic and healthier options. We are not into chain restaurants or fast foods.

Middle-eastern Grocery store
Nice bakery, Ice cream store…

Outdoor activities (parks for the children with nice play area, good places to take the dogs for walk)

Finally, we are middle-eastern by origin. We are pretty liberal. While neither of us is atheist we do not practice any religion. Is that going to be a problem? My wife is quite concern that it’d attract some problems to our children in the school in a small Midwestern town.
This is probably a tall order, but I am giving it a try.

Thank you so much for the patience to read all this mess - and best of wishes!

[jkiss]

Honestly I don't think you would like Springfield as much as you think you would. If you are used to larger cities Springfield is just really a town that has grown larger. I know you can find really nice places to live and isolate yourselves from much of the town here. But as far as parks go Springfield has some really nice parks. Most of the shopping is on the south side of town and the traffic is horrible. Downtown is a nightmare imo. No parking and really not a lot down there.

I would do some more research and also come to Springfield and stay for a few days to get a better feel for it. I like Springfield but looking back on our move here we liked the city we came from more. We can buy more here with the money we make though.

[OneHappyMan]

JKiss, thank you so much for your reply! As you suggested in your post, I am indeed planning to re-visit the area with my family. This time we are going to stay in SP. Meanwhile, I'd be grateful to hear from other locals.

[northbound74]

There's nothing horribly wrong with Springfield, but it wouldn't live up to all that you're wanting. If you move there, you'd have to learn to appreciate it for what it is, and not expect too much from it.
I've lived in Little Rock, and know a good bit about Springfield, with family who lives nearby.
Compared to Little Rock, the size isn't that much different.
Little Rock has traits that make if feel like an under-sized big city.
Springfield is more of an overgrown small town. It's is slightly smaller, but actually seems to have quite a bit more stuff in terms of restaurants and shopping.
Little Rock probably has a little more in the way of cultural amenities in the immediate area. It's also slightly more liberal and quite a bit more diverse.
Springfield overall is a little cleaner, has fewer run-down areas, and easily a lower crime rate.
Little Rock has more white-collar professionals, since it's Arkansas' only real healthcare and political hub. Those are the things that make it feel bigger than it actually is to some people.
Springfield has some of that, especially healthcare, but overall is more blue-collar.

[OneHappyMan]

Very good point NB, thanks for your input!

[Curmudgeon]

Throw an In-N-Out Burger into the mix with Whole Foods, Trader Joe's and Costco and you have the perfect recipe for living on the west coast, especially in California. As others have said, Springfield is a large small town and while it's working hard on becoming more sophisticated it still has quite a way to go. Best of luck to you.

[Arrby]

There is no Whole Foods, but what? No love for Mama Jean's? - Mama Jean's.

[northbound74]

Originally Posted by Arrby

There is no Whole Foods, but what? No love for Mama Jean's? - Mama Jean's.

Yeah, Springfield's plenty big to have those kinds of places, even if they're not national chains.

Mama Jean's sprang from Jean's Healthway in Ava. See? You can get that stuff out in the boonies.

[luzianne]

Well, what is more important - your marriage or your job? I'm thinking you may have to defer to your wife on this. Honestly, I live in Kansas City and I don't know if *I* could handle Springfield. It's a slower pace and just has a completely different vibe than a place with more going on. And if I am an Kansas City person who feels that way, I cannot even imagine how your wife would feel if she loves big cities.

Also - although it would be better for your career, would it be better for hers?

I'm just thinking if she really wouldn't be happy in Springfield, it might be best for your family not to move there.

And there is nothing at all wrong with Springfield. It's a great place to live and raise a family. But most people have an idea in their mind of what they like and where they want to live and it doesn't sound like Springfield fits at all with your wife's dream.

Maybe you could take a week to visit Springfield with your family, spend time with your friends, and see how she likes it after spending some time there. But if she's not completely on board, I wouldn't do it.

[littlemonkeys]

Springfield is a very blue collar, country sort of place. It definitely isn't what your wife is looking for. Ive lived here for about 10 years and as more of a city girl myself Ive never quite been able to feel like I fit in.

Not that there aren't plenty of positives about Springfield. There are. They just aren't what your wife is picturing. Like Springfield restaurants are largely chains. The health food stores dont have much to offer in the way of fresh produce, though you can get vitamins and things like that. They are nowhere near the level of Whole Foods.

If church is a big part of your life and you want an area where you can freely express your faith in God, this would be a good place. If you homeschool your children, Springfield has a lot of support for homeschoolers and activities they can be involved in. If you want a place where no one is going to care that you buy your clothes at WalMart or dont have a lot of money, Springfield is good. Its non pretentious and down to earth, country values. That doesnt sound like what your family is looking for though. I have a feeling your wife would have a hard time finding people she identified with.