Oh what have I done??? (St. Louis, Rolla: fit in, schools, university)

[xTheGeneralx]

Southern Mo. is one of the best places to live. The folks down there are extremely sincere and helpful to all. You won't find those kind of conditions in very many places in the world. Just stay out of "Tornado Alley."

[jeanniecs1977]

Im sorry but alot of people on here when i was reading seem very well out right rude. The lady asks for some advice and all get is well gosh she should just be greatful. Im moving from aace that has starbucks and all that.I enjoy those places and would have a diffacult time adjusting to. I also have` a young child and its very lonely being so isolated. but sounds like your gonna have to drive. Try doing like day trip once a week or if your four yr old takes naps half day trips. You know i grew up in the south and in the country and dont think people quite so rude or so unchristian like.

[ShadowCaver]

Originally Posted by jeanniecs1977

Im sorry but alot of people on here when i was reading seem very well out right rude. The lady asks for some advice and all get is well gosh she should just be greatful. Im moving from aace that has starbucks and all that.I enjoy those places and would have a diffacult time adjusting to. I also have` a young child and its very lonely being so isolated. but sounds like your gonna have to drive. Try doing like day trip once a week or if your four yr old takes naps half day trips. You know i grew up in the south and in the country and dont think people quite so rude or so unchristian like.

Apologies for the rudeness - please realize that what may be viewed as rudeness is possibly at times more of a defensive posturing, where some may not like change, or simply just don't understand fully the other person's POV, background, and/or desires. We all have goals and dreams, tempered by our own history and our aspirations - for example, especially pertaining to this topic [but not saying this is actually what is in anyone's thoughts], one person's 120 acre swath of land may be a paradise for privacy, hunting, nature, farming, etc., while that same spot in other's eyes may be more of a secluded 'prison' [taken to the extreme, but to make point here].

So, given all of that, coupled with the nature of (a) internet forums, and (b) difficulty at times to really get the 'feel' or 'emotions' of the written word, yea,,, quite few of the posts herein come across as rude, harsh, etc. - but, hopefully there are enough of other posts that balance those out. At the end of the day, for better and worse, this forum is a meeting place for a quite diverse group of individuals - and besides having different desires and wants personally, there is difference in how vocal they may be in stating such here too...

Lastly, don't get me wrong - I'm not at all defending such behaviour [as a mod or as a person], just explaining/discussing; but while the 'harsh' and 'rude' posts may come across as unfriendly, maybe view them instead in the light of being realistic, where some here are trying to slap a dose of reality into a dreamer's thought process [true, and granted, the slapping could be, might be done in a more "friendly" manner ]. Moving somewhere is never easy, but having ill conceived or mistaken ideas that such-and-such place is nothing but a paradise, that will make the move even more unpleasant and unbearable. For example, some people view life in FL as nothing but a true paradise - beaches, warm water, beautiful sand, gorgeous peoples, wonderful food & drinks, awesome sunsets & sunrises... but w/o ever really considering the negatives, the true realities of what can AND will occur in that area too.

[lone sailor]

Originally Posted by jeanniecs1977

Im sorry but alot of people on here when i was reading seem very well out right rude. The lady asks for some advice and all get is well gosh she should just be greatful. Im moving from aace that has starbucks and all that.I enjoy those places and would have a diffacult time adjusting to. I also have` a young child and its very lonely being so isolated. but sounds like your gonna have to drive. Try doing like day trip once a week or if your four yr old takes naps half day trips. You know i grew up in the south and in the country and dont think people quite so rude or so unchristian like.

Everyone has the right to their own opinion, good, bad, or indifferent. Questions were asked, and opinions were given. .. Good day.

[NOLA2SGF]

Originally Posted by jeanniecs1977

Im sorry but alot of people on here when i was reading seem very well out right rude. The lady asks for some advice and all get is well gosh she should just be greatful. Im moving from aace that has starbucks and all that.I enjoy those places and would have a diffacult time adjusting to. I also have` a young child and its very lonely being so isolated. but sounds like your gonna have to drive. Try doing like day trip once a week or if your four yr old takes naps half day trips. You know i grew up in the south and in the country and dont think people quite so rude or so unchristian like.

Whew! After reading this, I had to go back to see if I had responded to this thread. I was relieved to see that what I said was,

Originally Posted by NOLA2SGF

Just one thought to interject...

For whatever reasons, you really had no choice about moving there. So don't feel like it is a mistake. You are making the best of your circumstances and you should be proud of that. You should also be proud that you are searching even in this forum, for ideas to improve your situation rather than just settling for being unhappy.

Life sometimes throws us challenges that are hard for us to overcome. My father used to say that this develops character.... but I always told him that I had enough character already!

Hugs from 60-year-old lady who remembers how isolated a mother of young children can feel sometimes.

You know, I think a lot of those posting here didn't catch that for some reason the original poster didn't have a choice about her relocation to a small town that she didn't like. To me, that puts her post in a whole new light.

[Silvermouse]

Originally Posted by ShadowCaver

Apologies for the rudeness - please realize that what may be viewed as rudeness is possibly at times more of a defensive posturing, where some may not like change, or simply just don't understand fully the other person's POV, background, and/or desires. We all have goals and dreams, tempered by our own history and our aspirations - for example, especially pertaining to this topic [but not saying this is actually what is in anyone's thoughts], one person's 120 acre swath of land may be a paradise for privacy, hunting, nature, farming, etc., while that same spot in other's eyes may be more of a secluded 'prison' [taken to the extreme, but to make point here].

So, given all of that, coupled with the nature of (a) internet forums, and (b) difficulty at times to really get the 'feel' or 'emotions' of the written word, yea,,, quite few of the posts herein come across as rude, harsh, etc. - but, hopefully there are enough of other posts that balance those out. At the end of the day, for better and worse, this forum is a meeting place for a quite diverse group of individuals - and besides having different desires and wants personally, there is difference in how vocal they may be in stating such here too...

Lastly, don't get me wrong - I'm not at all defending such behaviour [as a mod or as a person], just explaining/discussing; but while the 'harsh' and 'rude' posts may come across as unfriendly, maybe view them instead in the light of being realistic, where some here are trying to slap a dose of reality into a dreamer's thought process [true, and granted, the slapping could be, might be done in a more "friendly" manner ]. Moving somewhere is never easy, but having ill conceived or mistaken ideas that such-and-such place is nothing but a paradise, that will make the move even more unpleasant and unbearable. For example, some people view life in FL as nothing but a true paradise - beaches, warm water, beautiful sand, gorgeous peoples, wonderful food & drinks, awesome sunsets & sunrises... but w/o ever really considering the negatives, the true realities of what can AND will occur in that area too.

Spot on, ShadowCaver!

[Nexxie]

It's almost like a miracle. I am here a year now and I actually survived. There were times when I actually contemplated checking out. It has been an experience and the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life. It has been very difficult for me the last year living so isolated from family, friends, and good neighbors. If the cows, deer, and turkey could speak (maybe even some of you Missourians) I may have had an easier time here. At times, I relly felt imprisoned.

There are so many things I do not understand about the life of people here and do not care to find out, therefore I will not ask. What I will say is I do have great respect for you. It appears most have a very hard life here and if I did have a lot of money I know now what I would do with it.

I hope to sell this beautiful piece of land and gorgeous new home and return to an easy life, my cookie cutter neighborhood, starbucks, malls, great parks, beaches, shopping, sunshine, boating, diving, great HEALTHY dining, the arts, theatre, good conversation and most of all a better education for my son where technology is offered at a young age.

I thank you all again for all the posts, I have read them all. Please keep us in your prayers that we will be home soon.

Thanks,
nexxie

[Curmudgeon]

Originally Posted by Nexxie

There are so many things I do not understand about the life of people here and do not care to find out, therefore I will not ask. What I will say is I do have great respect for you. It appears most have a very hard life here and if I did have a lot of money I know now what I would do with it.

Nexxie, as one who has survived living in three foreign countries and eight states, some of them more than once, and who will shortly be moving to my ninth, Missouri, I'd like to offer you a bit of a different perspective.

I have no idea of your age but would guess that you have a lot of years left which might take you to other places. If so, please DO get to know the people and try to take an interest in their way of life. To not care and not ask may deprive you of the opportunity to discover a true gem of philosophy and wisdom, or many. It decidedly deprives you of potential friendships.

I'm glad for you that you're headed back from whence you came but sad that your year appears to have been a wasted growth opportunuity.

[ozarksboy]

Originally Posted by Nexxie

It's almost like a miracle. I am here a year now and I actually survived. There were times when I actually contemplated checking out. It has been an experience and the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life. It has been very difficult for me the last year living so isolated from family, friends, and good neighbors. If the cows, deer, and turkey could speak (maybe even some of you Missourians) I may have had an easier time here. At times, I relly felt imprisoned.

There are so many things I do not understand about the life of people here and do not care to find out, therefore I will not ask. What I will say is I do have great respect for you. It appears most have a very hard life here and if I did have a lot of money I know now what I would do with it.

I hope to sell this beautiful piece of land and gorgeous new home and return to an easy life, my cookie cutter neighborhood, starbucks, malls, great parks, beaches, shopping, sunshine, boating, diving, great HEALTHY dining, the arts, theatre, good conversation and most of all a better education for my son where technology is offered at a young age.

I thank you all again for all the posts, I have read them all. Please keep us in your prayers that we will be home soon.

Thanks,
nexxie

That's wonderful news, Nexxie! Congratulations! You've served as a valuable example to many folks contemplating a move to rural Missouri, and I suspect some of them have decided to stay where they are after reading of your unhappiness in a new home on a secluded 120-acre tract next to the Gasconade River. That lifestyle just isn't comfortable for many folks who think they want a quiet rural lifestyle but after some research have second thoughts and decide the city is the best place for them.

Now, I hope many others will follow your example. Good luck on your return trip and your life in the city.

[NOLA2SGF]

Originally Posted by Nexxie

It's almost like a miracle. I am here a year now and I actually survived. There were times when I actually contemplated checking out. It has been an experience and the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life. It has been very difficult for me the last year living so isolated from family, friends, and good neighbors. If the cows, deer, and turkey could speak (maybe even some of you Missourians) I may have had an easier time here. At times, I relly felt imprisoned.

There are so many things I do not understand about the life of people here and do not care to find out, therefore I will not ask. What I will say is I do have great respect for you. It appears most have a very hard life here and if I did have a lot of money I know now what I would do with it.

I hope to sell this beautiful piece of land and gorgeous new home and return to an easy life, my cookie cutter neighborhood, starbucks, malls, great parks, beaches, shopping, sunshine, boating, diving, great HEALTHY dining, the arts, theatre, good conversation and most of all a better education for my son where technology is offered at a young age.

I thank you all again for all the posts, I have read them all. Please keep us in your prayers that we will be home soon.

Thanks,
nexxie

Nexxie, my very best wishes to you! Take care and I am glad that you can follow your dreams.