Oh what have I done??? (Kansas City, St. Louis: new house, buying, high school)

[Nexxie]

Oh my, what have I done....I moved to Hartville Mo from South Florida a few months ago. I am going stir crazy. There are no parks, no decent restaurants, and absolutely NOTHING to do and no shopping unless I drive a million miles....I have a 4 year old, finding it hard to meet people...Any "hartville" family things or is there ANYTHING here for kids?? Desperate..

[ozarksboy]

Nexxie, so sorry you don't like it out in the country. That happens often when big-city people come seeking peace, quiet and stress-free living.

Most newcomers to Missouri should choose one of three areas: Kansas City, St. Louis or Springfield-Branson. All of them have malls, Starbucks, Target, Red Lobster, etc., etc., so you'll really feel like you haven't moved from whatever city you just left.

Most newcomers should not choose to live in outstate Missouri. We are very rural and we have learned to get by. We drink our coffee in diners, not Starbucks, while wearing our hardware store or feed store caps. We go shopping and get our clothes at Wal-Mart. We go out to eat at one of the local restaurants and order the special. You probably wouldn't like it out here in the country. You would have liked Missouri if you had chosen one of the three metro areas, though.

You're previous post indicated you've built a new house on the Gasconade on 120 acres. Sounds like heaven to me. What's your husband say about leaving that investment behind?

We'd sure hate to see you go. We're busy trying to fill up this state, and so many Californians and Floridians are pouring in here. We were counting on you to stay and help us keep this place filled. Hang in there; more folks will move in soon and maybe Hartville will get a mall with a Trader Joe's anchoring it..

[northbound74]

Originally Posted by Nexxie

Oh my, what have I done....I moved to Hartville Mo from South Florida a few months ago. I am going stir crazy. There are no parks, no decent restaurants, and absolutely NOTHING to do and no shopping unless I drive a million miles....I have a 4 year old, finding it hard to meet people...Any "hartville" family things or is there ANYTHING here for kids?? Desperate..

My wife grew up a little south of there, and loved her upbringing. It's a very rural, outdoors culture, and you have to find your entertainment in that... or else you'll never like it.
I don't know if you hunt, fish, hike, or even kayak down the river, but those are the type of things you'll have to warm up to.
We lived in the country for a little while when I was growing up. I liked it better than any place else we lived. From a young boy's perspective, it was much more fun than any city could ever be.

There is a park in Ava, that has a walking path, tennis courts, and an outdoor public swimming pool. It's 30 minutes south of Hartville.
As for malls and dining, you've probably figured out that Springfield's your only hope for that. Some of the wayside places along 60 hwy can be interesting to stop in.
My wife's family made a trip to Springfield 2-3 times a month at the most, to get what they couldn't at home, or to just do the city thing for a day.
If you want more, then Kansas City and St. Louis aren't too far for a weekend trip.
We live in KC, and go down to the Ava area quite often to get away for a weekend.

I hope things work out better for you.

[ozarksboy]

Originally Posted by Nexxie

There are no parks, no decent restaurants, and absolutely NOTHING to do and no shopping unless I drive a million miles....I have a 4 year old, finding it hard to meet people...Any "hartville" family things or is there ANYTHING here for kids?? Desperate..

No parks? You're in the Ozarks, for goodness sake! The region is a giant park filled with beautiful trees, native grasses and wildflowers, scenic streams and interesting geology. Go on-line to the Missouri Department of Conservation site and buy Missouri Wildflowers, a must-have book, and books about our trees and birds. There's a tremendous book titled Missouri Geology by a guy named Jerry Vineyard, I think; I don't know if it's available from the MDC; you might have to go to the Missouri Department of Natural Resources website. Learn a little something about your new home state.

No decent restaurants? What's indecent about the restaurants in Hartville or Mansfield?

Ah, shopping; now I get it. You're one of the thousands of newcomers to Missouri with plenty of disposable income. Lots of those of us who grew up here and stayed here have been struggling all our lives to make ends meet. We're too busy tending the garden in summer, canning and freezing stuff for the winter, cutting or hauling firewood, to think about the lack of quality shopping experiences.

We meet people and get kids involved in activities at church. This Sunday at my church, for instance, we'll be studying the word of God in Sunday School, then we'll praise and worship the Lord Jesus Christ in the worship service and afterwards we'll fellowship with one another at our carry-in Thanksgiving dinner.

The kids and youth in church are getting ready for the Christmas program.

I'm sure there are plenty of good churches to choose from in the Hartville area. Your 4-year-old will love church.

There's a place in Wright County called Baker Creek Seeds that you ought to find out about. They have farm/garden festivals that are worth attending. Been to them a few times myself.

Your also near the Laura Ingalls Wilder homeplace. She didn't have any quality shopping experiences or "decent" restaurants but she made the most of it. I recommend a visit to her homeplace to learn a little about her.

There are probably some bluegrass jam sessions in your county each month. I'm sure there are gospel singings at various churches.

You're finding that real country living is nothing like what they portray in those country magazines published in New York City. I'm just a cranky old-timer so you'll understand when I say: If you're going to move to the country, you're going to have to get real country-like.

I hope other city folks who are contemplating a move to rural Missouri will think about your plight before they find themselves in similar circumstances.

I think you're blessed to be where you are, but I'm just a mean old Ozarks fart who apparently has no conception of the big picture of life.

[Cali BassMan]

Originally Posted by ozarksboy

Most newcomers should not choose to live in outstate Missouri. We are very rural and we have learned to get by. We drink our coffee in diners, not Starbucks, while wearing our hardware store or feed store caps. We go shopping and get our clothes at Wal-Mart. We go out to eat at one of the local restaurants and order the special. You probably wouldn't like it out here in the country. You're previous post indicated you've built a new house on the Gasconade on 120 acres. Sounds like heaven to me. What's your husband say about leaving that investment behind?

..

Hmmm I'm sitting here surounded by people thinking I want the rural life....
Then I read your post ............ Well let's see I drink my coffee from my own coffee pot... I'm wearing a Skeeter Bass Boat hat....but I do own a Tractor Supply hat...
I get my Clothes from Wal Mart, or Bass Pro or Cabbelas...
Best grub around is the local Diner Bab's Delta Dinner......
New House on 120 Acres sounds like heaven to me too...
think I'll fit????

[tambre]

Nexxie,

Could you put a small ad in the local newspaper for a SAHM group? Maybe you could meet some local women with young children this way...it's very isolating being home alone with a four-year old all day, everyday. You need someone who can relate to your situation. Maybe they have a Mom's group at the local community center, or a story hour at the local library, if there is one, as a way to meet people.

By the way, you're 120 acres and a house sounds lovely. It's always harder to meet people in the wintertime, but maybe you can make yourself busy with the holidays, and before you know it, it will be spring. Take Care and best of luck.

[OA 5599]

There is plenty to do in the Ozarks, you just have to find it. Hartville is in a gorgeous area. If you are looking for any urban amenities, as you have found, they don't exist there. Get out and enjoy the Ozarks. Take a float trip down the Gasconade, Big Piney, or North Fork rivers. Even in the fall and winter they are great fun. Go fishing. Take a walk in the woods (not a good idea right now due to firearms deer season however...wait until it ends). Go hiking in the Mark Twain National Forest...the Paddy Creek Wilderness, not too far from you around Success has many hiking trails, and is very scenic.

Go to high school football/basketball/baseball games in Hartville or Mountain Grove. As mentioned earlier, you'll meet a lot of people if you join a church. When spring rolls around, start a garden and enjoy fresh vegetables for months. Pick up cooking to replace the restaurant food you've been missing.

Living in the rural Ozarks will take some getting used to...and coming from South Florida, you are experiencing some culture shock right now! The quality of rural life is really quite good, so give it some time. My parents still live in the area...one is retired, and they find plenty of things to do.

I actually went through the opposite culture shock you are going through right now...moving from the Ozarks go the greater Washington, DC area. Both urban and rural areas can be fun, once you adjust to the large cultural differences. I'm very glad I grew up in the Ozarks fishing, hiking, hunting, and enjoying nature than in the suburbs though!

[Lake Junkie]

Originally Posted by Nexxie

Oh my, what have I done....I moved to Hartville Mo from South Florida a few months ago. I am going stir crazy. There are no parks, no decent restaurants, and absolutely NOTHING to do and no shopping unless I drive a million miles....I have a 4 year old, finding it hard to meet people...Any "hartville" family things or is there ANYTHING here for kids?? Desperate..

Nexxie,

Rural living has it's own charm & wonderment...you have many great suggestions in the posts above. I wouldn't abandon your dream just yet...may I ask what drew you to Hartville in the beginning? Did you visit there before buying?

Of all the people I work with, for some reason the Floridians have the hardest time adjusting. It is a culture adjustment!

15 years ago I moved from Sacramento to the same area, I lasted about a year before I moved into Springfield. Call me spoiled, I just thought as long as I was within 30 minutes of "stuff" I'd be ok... I finally found my Missouri dream in the Table Rock Lake area. It's the best of small town living along with the benefits of all the amenities of a larger place because of the tourism. The people are friendly and the locals accepting of newcomers.

Please keep us posted of your experiences so we can share it with others?

[ShadowCaver]

lol, gosh durn,,, aren't we Ozarkians such a friendly warm bunch? Seriously, while all posts in replying to you are quite factual, they may seem harsh - but, please, consider that you [possibly unwillingly ] moved here, but are now speaking in not so positive tones about what vast majority of us that have these hills and hollers coursing in our veins, and which we love,,, and therefore will defend her honour, the honour of this land, and the lifestyle therein.

Yea, when I read your posts Nexxie, I too get a bit tad defensive, wonderin' [as LJ inquired] what in tarnation brought you to this area? Guessing husband dragged ya there, while your hankerin instead for the pavement and shops and such... And you turned to this forum for support - so, with that said, please understand the defensive tones, but don't take it personally, 'k? Take what has been offered to you, mix it w/ your own situation as only you know what it is, and try to make the best of what you have, where you are.

Evidently, you have at least one wonderful child - live and love for him, enjoy the school, the area, the peoples; get to know it - yes, it is different, vastly so from what you know, and from what you have experienced in Florida. Not better, not worse, just different - and to some of us deranged goofy folks, this however [for the most part] is indeed better.

Tell ya what, when moved from MO to IN the first time, that too was a slight adjustment - knew nobody, and folks here are also kinda clanish to outsiders/newcomers,,, but, w/ time and open mind and fun heart, 'tis all good [no, not as good as the Ozarks], but have found many very things to enjoy, good peeps, interesting activities, great vittles, and a new experience in life by being here, that otherwise wouldn't have gained.

Sorry for the rambling, tired noggin after last nights Blue's game and full day of hunting for Bambi's poppa... . Anyhow, best to you and yours, good luck, and hope ya enjoy what this land/area has to offer for ya. And, yes, indeed, that does sound like a very nice place - the Gasconade is a favourite river of mine, so yea, am tad prejudiced...

[ozarksboy]

Nexxie,

I think ShadowCaver is referring primarily to me when he talks about Ozarkers who are offensive/defensive. I'm offensive because I just don't understand you.

On Sept. 13, you wrote this (the boldface is my editing):

Originally Posted by Nexxie

Hi,
We moved from Ft. Lauderdale Fl, to Hartville a few months ago. It's a nice small town (pop about 600) It is beautiful here, however I am homesick for convenience of malls and shopping. Don't know if we will stay. My son loves going to school here at Hartville preschool. The teachers are great, the people very friendly. No crime. It has been culture shock for me. We bought 120 acres on the gasconade river and are building and almost finished with our new home. If you are looking for this kind of land on the river and a new house (4 bedroom) let me know. I may have to sell and get out quick for my sanity. Good Luck to you

Then just last week, you wrote this:

Originally Posted by Nexxie

Oh my, what have I done....I moved to Hartville Mo from South Florida a few months ago. I am going stir crazy. There are no parks, no decent restaurants, and absolutely NOTHING to do and no shopping unless I drive a million miles....I have a 4 year old, finding it hard to meet people...Any "hartville" family things or is there ANYTHING here for kids?? Desperate..

You're complaining of no parks, yet you have a new house on 120 acres right on the Gasconade! You don't understand what a blessing that is for you and your son. You remind me of the old Green Acres situation comedy.

Well, I'm on your side and I want you to be happy, so I know you won't take offense when I say: I hope you can quickly sell that gem of a place to someone who will appreciate it (shouldn't have any problem if the price is right, I wish I could afford it), pull your son out of the school he loves and high-tail it back to the Fort Lauderdale mall where you feel you belong.