Women in Missouri (Springfield, Columbia, Joplin: fit in, transplants, home)

[tambre]

Hi, this thread is for and about the women in Missouri, whether natives or transplants. How do you feel you are treated regarding equality in the workplace, social settings, religious settings, family dynamics, etc.? What is your opinion or perspective on any women's issues you would care to discuss? This thread could include any and all issues relating to woman,...i.e., healthcare, child raising, working, shopping, politics, hobbies. I would like to learn more about the daily lives and opinions of women in Missouri. No topic is off limits.

[cool57one]

I am a woman who moved to Mo. 12 years ago, from Washington state, but originally from California. I live in a very small town & I think the women are repressed and do whatever their husbands order! Needless to say I don't fit in & never will. They are paid less at their jobs than a male counterpart, they are controlled by their religion also. Many people here have never gone out of the area so they lack culture. I get out of here as much as possible, I enjoy Branson it's somewhat normal at least the tourists are.I am planning to move over to the Branson area, I know the people are similar to these but there's plenty to do & lots of tourists to meet & greet. JM

[bhaze]

[tambre]

Originally Posted by cool57one

I am a woman who moved to Mo. 12 years ago, from Washington state, but originally from California. I live in a very small town & I think the women are repressed and do whatever their husbands order! Needless to say I don't fit in & never will. They are paid less at their jobs than a male counterpart, they are controlled by their religion also. Many people here have never gone out of the area so they lack culture. I get out of here as much as possible, I enjoy Branson it's somewhat normal at least the tourists are.I am planning to move over to the Branson area, I know the people are similar to these but there's plenty to do & lots of tourists to meet & greet. JM

Hi Cool57one,

What you have experienced is unfortunate but not necessarily uncommon, and I hope you can find improved equality in wages and typical family dynamics when you move to the Branson area. May I ask what kind of work you do? I'm glad you responded, as I think Missouri woman need to be heard, and to be able to express themselves, even if their opinions differ from each other. There are no wrong answers to these topics...just personal stories.

What kinds of activities do you do with your girlfriends? Do any of you have a "girls night out", or get together for quilting, canning, shopping, karaoke, volunteering, movies, going out to eat, etc., or are you involved in mostly church and family related activities? What kind of work do you do? Are you juggling work with family responsibilities? How hard is it finding childcare? Any topic is open for discussion.

Thanks for your reply Cool57one.

[christina0001]

Great thread idea.
I moved here two years ago. I haven't experienced any real inequality issues. One issue I have with Missouri is that it would be almost impossible to have a safe home birth. I don't have kids yet but if I did, I would be interested in having them at home. I think most hospitals are too filled with germs and not comfortable at all. I looked into it and to have a home birth with a doctor or nurse practitioner (if I recall correctly, midwivery is very strictly regulated but I could be wrong), you have to be within so many miles of the facility they practice at and the only one I could find in the state is in Columbia. Very disappointing.
Socially I have friends and we go camping, but it is mainly couples and their kids, no girl-specific activities. Most of the women I have met seem reluctant to do anything without their spouse/boyfriend and/or kids.

[firebll31]

I am a woman in her early 40's-married 20 years, no kids, lots of pets, lots of family close by, work in the medical field, lived in Missouri all my life (Eureka, then Carthage). I am treated as an equal at work, I am very spiritual but do not attend church. My husband respects me and values my opinions and we work together on many issues. Because we don't have kids, we have had the opportunity to travel more than most our age and love learning about other cultures. Most of my friends are either older (kids grown up) or younger (no kids yet) since the ones my age are busy with ballgames, dance class, etc. We usually do things together, but I am perfectly fine on my own. A good friend and I took a "girlfriend" trip to the bottom of the Grand Canyon on mules and had a great time without the guys. We sometimes travel with another couple-I like to fish but my hubby doesn't, so I fish with her hubby while mine shops with her. This area is very low cost of living, which translates to low wages. One of the biggest challenges is teenage pregnancy. This restricts many girls in terms of education, job choice and independence, and doesn't allow time to develop a sense of "self" which I think is important. I have been fortunate to come from a stable family life, which encouraged independence. The opportunities are there but I see too many women making poor life choices-quitting school, drugs, welfare as a lifestyle, undesirable men, etc. I really don't think these are "Missouri" problems as they occur nationwide. Are there a higher percentage of these problems in Missouri? I don't know...

[joetownmom]

I'm a lifelong Missouri resident and native; I've lived in the large cities, in very rural areas, in mid-size cities like Joplin, and currently in a small town. It has not been my personal experience that women are treated worse in MO than in any other state. I have never been passed over for a promotion because of my gender or experience any gender bias.

[Mollym313]

Originally Posted by tambre

Hi, this thread is for and about the women in Missouri, whether natives or transplants. How do you feel you are treated regarding equality in the workplace, social settings, religious settings, family dynamics, etc.? What is your opinion or perspective on any women's issues you would care to discuss? This thread could include any and all issues relating to woman,...i.e., healthcare, child raising, working, shopping, politics, hobbies. I would like to learn more about the daily lives and opinions of women in Missouri. No topic is off limits.

I think it depends on which era you come from. I see the "old" ideas that a woman is the cook and housekeeper/child rearing but I see that mostly with the older generation (baby boomers and older). I am a transplant of 20 years and I really have not felt repressed or treated differently. My ex husband had the idea that women raised kids and went through childbirth with a smile on their face (what a moron). But honestly I think that was because he was an idiot and should not be a reflection on men as a whole. I think too, that smaller communities may see more repressed situations because an "old way" sticks around for generations longer than a larger "more modern" environment. The more outside influences that we have, the greater the chance that we will have more choices in how we want to live.

[Hillman]

Speaking for my wife she is a Jane of all trades,very hard working Farm Girl.One time she got hired to install Satellite T.V. Dish.She went to Springfield to stay down there few days for training.Couple nights later she calls me highly upset and crying.

I asked what was wrong.She said everything was going well when the Trainer called her into another room away from everyone.Told her a woman had no place doing this work and he would not have one working under him to pack her stuff up and get out.

There was nothing she could do because he told her this in private.

But up until the last few years she had been making more than me.

hillman

[Mollym313]

Originally Posted by Hillman

Speaking for my wife she is a Jane of all trades,very hard working Farm Girl.One time she got hired to install Satellite T.V. Dish.She went to Springfield to stay down there few days for training.Couple nights later she calls me highly upset and crying.

I asked what was wrong.She said everything was going well when the Trainer called her into another room away from everyone.Told her a woman had no place doing this work and he would not have one working under him to pack her stuff up and get out.

There was nothing she could do because he told her this in private.

But up until the last few years she had been making more than me.

hillman

You know that brings up an interesting point...women in the military realling stirred up a stink. If they were nurses that was fine but not if they were next to them in battle.

The explanation given was....that women would be a distraction to the men. (u think?) Ok I get that point and also...most men (not all) feel they are to be protectors of women. I will be quite honest, I understand that line of reasoning and feel it is a very valid point.

As far as your wife Hillman...I think he was threatened that a woman could do his job as good or better than him. Some men can't bear the thought of looking bad in front of a woman. Or he was afraid she would get hurt and he'd be blamed for hiring a woman in the first place. It sounds more like the "old way" of thinking and can't stand the thought of a woman doin a mans work. Either way...he's a weenie