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Old 02-23-2008, 06:55 PM
 
52 posts, read 289,166 times
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I am thinking about moving to Ivins. We have gone back several times to visit the area and truely fell in love with the beauty of it!!!!! Can anyone give me some information on life in Ivins?? My husband and I have 3 children ( 6,10 and 13). We are a Christian family and really hope it would be a good place to raise the kids. Being non LDS we are wondering if the kids will feel out of place? We would make the move today but want some confirmation as to a Christian family moving in. Thanks for you help!!! Should we be concerned for the sake of the kids??
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Old 02-23-2008, 07:16 PM
 
Location: Back home to Northern CA
157 posts, read 576,343 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by amykis5 View Post
I am thinking about moving to Ivins. We have gone back several times to visit the area and truely fell in love with the beauty of it!!!!! Can anyone give me some information on life in Ivins?? My husband and I have 3 children ( 6,10 and 13). We are a Christian family and really hope it would be a good place to raise the kids. Being non LDS we are wondering if the kids will feel out of place? We would make the move today but want some confirmation as to a Christian family moving in. Thanks for you help!!! Should we be concerned for the sake of the kids??
My advice to you is rent for a year or so before committing to buy...easier to change your mind just in case.
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Old 02-23-2008, 09:43 PM
 
23 posts, read 87,999 times
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I just posted twice about the discrimation that my kids get in our LDS neighborhood. I'll link to one of them:

Discrimination happens all the time; be prepared for your kids to feel left out...a lot.

Questions about Cedar City...
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Old 02-24-2008, 09:00 PM
 
52 posts, read 289,166 times
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Default cedarcityutahrez

Thanks for your info. Yes, I have been hesitant to the move for this reason. Do you happen to know any St. George non LDS moms that have their children in the public school system? I believe St. George is 60% LDS~~is that the current %??? Don't get me wrong, I have close mormon friends who I adore but it is a totally different story when you have children. We are a strong Christian family and I would hate to add added pressure to my kids fitting in.It is hard enough without religion!!!!!! Do you know of any St. George moms that have had good and bad experiences??Thanks for you input.
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Old 02-25-2008, 09:58 AM
 
23 posts, read 87,999 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by amykis5 View Post
Thanks for your info. Yes, I have been hesitant to the move for this reason. Do you happen to know any St. George non LDS moms that have their children in the public school system? I believe St. George is 60% LDS~~is that the current %??? Don't get me wrong, I have close mormon friends who I adore but it is a totally different story when you have children. We are a strong Christian family and I would hate to add added pressure to my kids fitting in.It is hard enough without religion!!!!!! Do you know of any St. George moms that have had good and bad experiences??Thanks for you input.
Just last night, someone in the know, told me that Santa Clara is the worst area for non-LDS discrimation.

I don't know how different Cedar City would be from St. George...but you may want to make a point to find a subdivision that is not 100% Mormon. Our neighbors smile and wave....but they are busy when my kids ask to play...then we will see their kids jump on their scooter and go play with an LDS child. They do not invite my children over to play; because, their parents would rather incourage play with children of the same religion. They are not being mean to us; they feel that they are protecting their children and helping them get into their highest level of Heaven. It's not like LDS are going to discriminate against you to be mean. It's that they believe that LDS friends/playmates are a much better choice...and in Utah...they have lots of options for LDS friends...so why bother with NON-LDS friends.

LDS have lots of social interaction through their Wards and members of their Wards....most are very fulfilled that way, so they likely won't be looking for more friends. They may be friendly with you; but your likelihood of having a friendship with more depth...not so much.

I don't like putting my kids in a *possible, albeit, theoretical* situtation where they would feel like they would do most anything to have a *true* friend, who wants to spend time with them.

Whatever your decision, at least your are aware of the possibilites. We moved to Utah and we knew nothing. I was happy to move into a state that had many of the same family values, conservative nature, and wholesomeness that my family and I have. I just didn't know that if you weren't a member that almost all LDS have their own LDS social network promoted by their Wards...so really...why would they have a need for a NON-LDS friend....most don't have a need at all. And, your kids will likely eventually feel the sting....it took us 2 years...during the dating years...it's almost a given. I know a former LDS family, who has teenage boys....and one of the boys is thinking of converting himself, because potential girlfriends have told him that since his isn't LDS...there can never be anything serious between them.


Like I stated earlier, I had no idea, I thought that as long as one embodied similar values and was kind, outgoing and social that most would be fine. I was mistaken.
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Old 02-25-2008, 10:58 AM
 
1 posts, read 7,126 times
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There has been alot of growth in the area, including alot of different religious denominations coming to Utah. It's still a great place to raise kids. The schools are good, and the the Red Mountains are awesome. There are some good web sites for the St. George and Ivins area. Hope this helps, and good luck.
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Old 02-25-2008, 12:57 PM
 
1,804 posts, read 6,988,395 times
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Iíve been reading your posts for the last couple of days, and have a few thoughts. First, I believe you are dead on with statements like this:

Quote:
Originally Posted by CedarCityUtahRez View Post
LDS have lots of social interaction through their Wards and members of their Wards....most are very fulfilled that way, so they likely won't be looking for more friends. They may be friendly with you; but your likelihood of having a friendship with more depth...not so much.
I believe that this does happen a lot, and is an unfortunate phenomenon due to the prevailing Mormon social structure. I feel bad for people who have to struggle with disappointments resulting there from.

But then I get to the cynical portions of your posts:
Quote:
Originally Posted by CedarCityUtahRez View Post
they feel that they are protecting their children and helping them get into their highest level of Heaven
First of all, I donít know anyone who holds a belief like that. Second, I believe it is presumptuous and inappropriate to sarcastically paraphrase someoneís religious beliefs in such a way. Third, when I see attitudes like that it does little to endear myself to your legitimate plight. Therefore I begin to wonder if there is something not just wrong with your neighborsí attitudes, but with yours as well. Having posted on this forum for a couple of years, many non-LDS people have very positive experiences. I wonder if the difference is luck of the draw, differences in attitude and perception, or some of both.

I am only speaking for myself, but I would feel more empathy toward you if I sensed a less cynicism. Maybe Iím the only one. Maybe others feel the same way.
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Old 02-25-2008, 02:21 PM
 
23 posts, read 87,999 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by coolcats View Post
I’ve been reading your posts for the last couple of days, and have a few thoughts. First, I believe you are dead on with statements like this:



I believe that this does happen a lot, and is an unfortunate phenomenon due to the prevailing Mormon social structure. I feel bad for people who have to struggle with disappointments resulting there from.

But then I get to the cynical portions of your posts:


First of all, I don’t know anyone who holds a belief like that. Second, I believe it is presumptuous and inappropriate to sarcastically paraphrase someone’s religious beliefs in such a way. Third, when I see attitudes like that it does little to endear myself to your legitimate plight. Therefore I begin to wonder if there is something not just wrong with your neighbors’ attitudes, but with yours as well. Having posted on this forum for a couple of years, many non-LDS people have very positive experiences. I wonder if the difference is luck of the draw, differences in attitude and perception, or some of both.

I am only speaking for myself, but I would feel more empathy toward you if I sensed a less cynicism. Maybe I’m the only one. Maybe others feel the same way.
I fell that it really wasn't fair that way you excerpted the smallest amount of of what I wrote to make it look the most negative...what I wrote before and after states that I wasn't being a purposeful malicious paraphraser of LDS religion and that I was actually defending their actions as NOT mean.
I wrote what I was told, that it's a protection of their children's gaining of Heaven. If that is wrong, I apologize. My friend, who's a temple Mormon, told me that. I was not trying to paraphrase anyone's beliefs, once again, I am sorry if it came across in that manner. I will be more careful.

I, in absolutely no way, was trying to be sarcastic. If I was trying to be sarcastic...I would have been obvious with a <roll eyes> or a .

I respect that people try to do the best for their children and was writing that it's obviously a serious reason why an LDS parent would not want their child to play with my child, if they believe that they might be less likely to attain Heaven. Again, that was evident before and after the quote that you "cut out" and called paraphrasing and cynical.

I would have rather known that it could be like this in the area that I now live. I would not have moved here; I would have chosen to live in a different state. I have not tried to bash anyone's religion and I'm not trying to change anyone's beliefs in my area. I have been neighborly and friendly...I have encouraged my children to do the same. We have planned little get-togethers and parties that are for pure fun--no hidden agenda.

As far a cynicism, it's difficult to see one's emotions from written word. I have written that my neighbors smile and wave...they just would prefer that their children establish relationships with LDS children and they have plenty to choose from.

We have lived in different states before here and did not have issues with finding friends or playmates for our children. I did not know anything about the LDS social structure in Utah, before we moved. At the risk of being too presumptuous....it's not an attitude thing, really.

Anyway, I am trying to find groups and activities, in this area, where my kids can make some friends. Our other neighborhoods (in other states) were just so easy....live in a neighborhood, get to know the neighbors, kids playing....just simple and easy.


Off to make new friends...

Last edited by CedarCityUtahRez; 02-25-2008 at 02:42 PM..
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Old 02-25-2008, 04:45 PM
 
Location: Over Yonder..
77 posts, read 385,825 times
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Our family and my sons family have only been here a year...My grandson was going to have a birthday party at their home...My daughter in law scheduled it for a 5 pm on a week night and invited kids from school... I thought the time a little odd, but what the heck...I have read the forum since we moved here...In the back of my mind I was thinking.....Hmmm..I wonder if any kids will show since we aren't LDS...At 5 pm on the dot kids came out of the woodwork and showed for the party...That made me feel really good...
So I guess the door can swing either way...In our case my grandkids seem to have been accepted, even though I realize that's not always the case...I am sorry..I wish it was the case for all children..It should be!
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Old 02-25-2008, 06:39 PM
 
23 posts, read 87,999 times
Reputation: 27
Quote:
Originally Posted by Purplegrapes View Post
Our family and my sons family have only been here a year...My grandson was going to have a birthday party at their home...My daughter in law scheduled it for a 5 pm on a week night and invited kids from school... I thought the time a little odd, but what the heck...I have read the forum since we moved here...In the back of my mind I was thinking.....Hmmm..I wonder if any kids will show since we aren't LDS...At 5 pm on the dot kids came out of the woodwork and showed for the party...That made me feel really good...
So I guess the door can swing either way...In our case my grandkids seem to have been accepted, even though I realize that's not always the case...I am sorry..I wish it was the case for all children..It should be!

It hasn't been a total and absolute shunning....my kids were invited to one birthday party and the neighborhood girls came to my girl's birthday get together. That was last year. It's been 2 years and it's just that the neighborhood are "almost always busy" They do get to play with the neighborhood kids a few times a year. The mom of the girls that we invited to the birthday is nice enough that she wouldn't do that to my girls on their birthday, I'm sure. LDS aren't mean people; many just prefer to keep to their own and their Wards are set up to really facilitate in that.

Hopefully...your grandkids will continue to not encounter any "friend issues".
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