Single men: DO NOT move to St Louis (St. Louis, California: school, university)

[wolfman85]

Originally Posted by BoomBoxing

Of course your dating problems aren't the result of any of your personal defects, OP! It's everyone else and your particular geographic location that are the problem!

I don't deny that I have personal defects. That still doesn't explain though why I can get dates in West Texas despite my personal defects, whereas in St Louis I cannot. So yes, the geographic location is the problem. My lack of dates is not related to any personal defect in particular, but rather to the closed-off nature of St Louis society. Women here think every man unless she knew him from high school is a "creep" and they go out of their way to avoid unknown men. They don't even have the decency to show me eye contact when I pass by them on the street; they look away thinking I'm going to rape them.

[ProgMichael]

Originally Posted by wolfman85

You have it backwards. My post was intended for people NOT from the St Louis area. It was NOT intended for people from the St Louis area. If you had no problem meeting people, then please tell me what you did because I'm at my wit's end trying to figure out how to make friends/find a woman here.

Judging by your screen name, perhaps you just need a full body wax and you'll be ready to rock n roll.

In all seriousness, how about an on-line dating site like E-Harmony or Match.com? Or Zoosk if you're looking for something a little more "frisky".

[tallahasseehero1]

Originally Posted by BoomBoxing

So what do you think any of that proves? How do you make the leap that your experiences are applicable to a large group of people when you have dealt with relatively few of them? Frankly, I get tired of all the generalizations and stereotyping people do on city-data. I'm sure you can find plenty of negative posts about the people in west Texas and every other place on here. While I accept certain personality traits are more prevelant in certain places, the gross generalizations and super-specific traits cited by the OP reek of someone with little understanding or experience dealing with people of different backgrounds and personalities. Also, a (un)healthy dose of externalizing personal failures. Of course your dating problems aren't the result of any of your personal defects, OP! It's everyone else and your particular geographic location that are the problem!

You should repost this to every thread on this site. Making sweeping statements about areas with hundreds of thousands or even millions of people is absurd. I cant stand when people say, every one in this city is rude or ugly ect...Usually if everyone you meet is reacting poorly to you, you should take a look in the mirror before blaming a whole city. Every place I have ever been to has a population that is mostly nice.

[BoomBoxing]

Originally Posted by wolfman85

I don't deny that I have personal defects. That still doesn't explain though why I can get dates in West Texas despite my personal defects, whereas in St Louis I cannot. So yes, the geographic location is the problem. My lack of dates is not related to any personal defect in particular, but rather to the closed-off nature of St Louis society. Women here think every man unless she knew him from high school is a "creep" and they go out of their way to avoid unknown men. They don't even have the decency to show me eye contact when I pass by them on the street; they look away thinking I'm going to rape them.

How do you know that your personal defects aren't the problem? I don't want to be mean because none of us are perfect, but just because you are striking out in St. Louis doesn't mean the women are necessarily the problem. I don't doubt you have encountered some aspects of the parochial nature of a certain subset of St. Louisan that exists in all cities that is distrustful of outsiders. Heck I have some serious doubts west Texas is some sort of open minded melting pot utopia where all are welcome. The problem is that you seem to hold that up as an excuse for your failings in the dating department when that just doesn't hold up in a metro area of millions of people. And your use of a few examples as justifying your generalization and stereotype just comes off as dishonest and a bit immature. Meet more people and just keep at it and you will find your niche, and maybe even your dream girl. Just drop the negative attitude and see what happens.

[CSD610]

Wolfman85: I went to bookstores, museums, the park, the zoo, coffee shops, a couple baseball games, played on a dart league, and I worked evenings and midnights. The botanical gardens is beautiful and quite interesting, the museums are stellar, the science center is wonderful as well. I'm not a bar lover so the only time I was in a bar or club was when I was shooting darts for the league, otherwise I never went to them. I love the Fox and the Muni as well and Forest Park is wonderful to walk through and they have the Renaissance Fair as well which is always fun.

[thenewtexan]

Originally Posted by wolfman85

I am a 27-year-old man who has lived in the St Louis area for two years now and am making plans to leave this city ASAP. Despite the fact that I have a very stable job here, I am leaving because I cannot find a woman here no matter how hard I try.

Since moving here I have not managed to find even a single friend, let alone a woman. People in the St Louis area are not interested in meeting new people and if you didn't grow up here, you will always be an outsider and will never be accepted. If you don't have the St Louis accent, then people say "you have an accent" and then when you reply that they have an accent too, they respond "I don't have an accent" as if the St Louis way of speaking were the "real" way of speaking English and everyone else speaks a second-class English. (Take it from an outsider, people in St Louis have a very distinctive accent, there is nothing "standard" about the St Louis accent).

Women in St Louis are very violent; do not EVER disagree with them on ANYTHING or they will immediately start using profanity towards you, get in your face, and threaten to beat you up.

This lack of love, companionship, and sex is completely unhealthy for a human and I believe I am already beginning to suffer from the physiological effects. Therefore, for my health I am moving away from this city. I encourage all single men considering a move to St Louis to strongly reconsider. If you arrive here single, you will leave here single.

Just to be sure, this is St. Louis, MO, not East St. Louis, IL, right?

[Dawn10am]

I'm also a transplant to St. Louis and I've had no trouble at all meeting people here. Granted, I did come here for school so a lot of my friends are from there, but I've also made quite a few non-school STL friends as well. The transplant thing is not even an issue. Where do you hang out mostly? City or County? I'd be willing to bet there's a lot more transplants in the City, not to mention more places to go, things to do, and more opportunities for social interaction. Also, are you from West Texas? If so then there might be your answer.

[wolfman85]

Originally Posted by Dawn10am

Also, are you from West Texas? If so then there might be your answer.

What was that supposed to mean?

[wolfman85]

Originally Posted by CSD610

Wolfman85: I went to bookstores, museums, the park, the zoo, coffee shops, a couple baseball games, played on a dart league, and I worked evenings and midnights. The botanical gardens is beautiful and quite interesting, the museums are stellar, the science center is wonderful as well. I'm not a bar lover so the only time I was in a bar or club was when I was shooting darts for the league, otherwise I never went to them. I love the Fox and the Muni as well and Forest Park is wonderful to walk through and they have the Renaissance Fair as well which is always fun.

In other words, meeting people should be a full time job in which you have to fill your life with "hobbies". I've been to all the museums in the area and the chance of me meeting a woman at a museum is non-existent. Meeting women at baseball games? How does that work exactly?

It's like I said, my chances for meeting women are very slim since the women only want to be met at one of two places: high school or college. If you arrive here after college, then all the women are either already married or have their own unique clique. I don't know how you did it but I just can't seem to do it. That is why it's best for me to move back to West Texas.

My purpose on here is not to bash St Louis just to bash St Louis, but to let any single man who is considering a move to St Louis know that they have a great chance of ending up like me, single after two years of searching. I'm sick of devoting my entire life to try to find a woman and coming up empty.

[wolfman85]

Originally Posted by thenewtexan

Just to be sure, this is St. Louis, MO, not East St. Louis, IL, right?

Yes, this is St Louis, MO I am talking about. Both the city and the county.