just alittle advice (cliquey, houses, neighborhood)

[phyll]

I am not sure what to do here,I have my 4 yr old grandaughter living with me, the neighbors behind us have a 5 yr old daughter. My grandaughter stands at our metal fence calling the girl's name asks if she wants to play,she alawys is either not aloud or says no, leaving my grandaughter heartbroken.
I know the girl is older,they never fought, and played nice the very few times they did play.The mom is not very friendly to us, the dad is nice though.My husband and I never had a screaming match, or don't drink, or anything like that.I don't understand.I am ready when they go out to plant LARGE evergreens to block my g-daughters view of the home!I feel so sad for my grandaughter ,and she is the only kid by our home to, but we do take her to the park to play though and she has a friend there, he's a liitle older, but they play nice.So after ALL this RAMBLIN do I plant BIG BIG evergreens?

[Bones]

Cows would be nice..... Could not let that one go....

I would try to overwhelm them with an act of kindness first. Bake a cake or cookies and take them over there with granddaughter also. Let them know you want to be friends and the children to be friends also. Kill them with kindness first.....

[TnHilltopper]

Originally Posted by Bones

Cows would be nice..... Could not let that one go....

I would try to overwhelm them with an act of first. Bake a cake or cookies and take them over there with granddaughter also. Let them know you want to be friends and the children to be friends also. Kill them with kindness first.....

Exactly! Hardest thing to put up with is a good example.

[phyll]

Originally Posted by Bones

Cows would be nice..... Could not let that one go....

I would try to overwhelm them with an act of first. Bake a cake or cookies and take them over there with granddaughter also. Let them know you want to be friends and the children to be friends also. Kill them with kindness first.....

ok, being from Jersey and how we are fresh , I rather do KILLER COWS! just joking,I really don't understand,we have had conversations with them,and they did play a coulpe times, maybe they don't just like us

[gary1958]

Maybe it's the age difference in the adults? Or maybe it's the Jersey slang? J/K Really hard to read people sometimes. My advice since you don't know is not to push the issue,and just try and be friendly. Remember you have to live next to them.

[phyll]

Originally Posted by gary1958

Maybe it's the age difference in the adults? Or maybe it's the Jersey slang? J/K Really hard to read people sometimes. My advice since you don't know is not to push the issue,and just try and be friendly. Remember you have to live next to them.

I don't think it's the adult age difference,I'm not THAT old yetI didn't hit 50 yet(next yr)but the age thing made me think and watch today, she doesn't really have to watch her 5yr old like I still have to keep an eye on my g-daughter,so might be that.We still talk and stuff, I surely don't want bad blood! Especially with this JOISEY accent

[gary1958]

I was assuming there could be enough age difference that maybe you don't have that much in common. I hit the big 50 this year and now everyone thinks I'm an old fart

[hiknapster]

Hey! We are all about the same age. I'm 46!

Are you living in a subdivision, or are these just homes in the country? I live out in the country, and deal with a lot of country folk at my job. Some of them are not very friendly. Some can be openly hostile.

Now, it could be something all together different, but I think some of the people that I have dealt with are not natural socializers. I think it's the way they were brought up, perhaps handed down for generations, having to grow up in rural areas.

What I am saying, is please don't take it personally. I know that it is so hard for a little one to understand. I don't think you were on the forum, phyll, when I wrote a lot about my neighborhood. It has been very bad for the past few years that we have been here.

My daughter is now eight, and has school and goes to the Boys and Girls Club during the summer and for about ten minutes after school. It gives her some kids to play with, although some can be cliquey.

It is a big reason that I started to work. I just couldn't stand having to keep her in the house all the time.

Now that we are looking for a house I have paid very close attention to the kids in each neighborhood. I'm so afraid we will end up in the same situation.

[phyll]

Originally Posted by hiknapster

Hey! We are all about the same age. I'm 46!

Are you living in a subdivision, or are these just homes in the country? I live out in the country, and deal with a lot of country folk at my job. Some of them are not very friendly. Some can be openly hostile.

Now, it could be something all together different, but I think some of the people that I have dealt with are not natural socializers. I think it's the way they were brought up, perhaps handed down for generations, having to grow up in rural areas.

What I am saying, is please don't take it personally. I know that it is so hard for a little one to understand. I don't think you were on the forum, phyll, when I wrote a lot about my neighborhood. It has been very bad for the past few years that we have been here.

My daughter is now eight, and has school and goes to the Boys and Girls Club during the summer and for about ten minutes after school. It gives her some kids to play with, although some can be cliquey.

It is a big reason that I started to work. I just couldn't stand having to keep her in the house all the time.

Now that we are looking for a house I have paid very close attention to the kids in each neighborhood. I'm so afraid we will end up in the same situation.

No, It's just houses, and stupidly, I didn't check the kid ratio, but saw a yard fenced in ,big where she had plenty of room,and safe.The home I came from I had to have hooks way up on the door so she couldn't run out-the street was buisy as anything!so this yard was great. I am sorry about your neighborhood, I am trying to figure things out as to stay in THIS home or not.
My husband and I fortunatly only met like a very few not nice folks here in TN

[TN_Dreamin]

I think I'd be spending a lot of time out in my back yard having such a great time that neighbor girl just couldn't resist joining in. Put out a slip n slide or a kiddie pool, play chase or kick ball with your gd, or bring out popsicles or cookies. Kids love that stuff.
I'd also do a search for MOMS clubs or MEET UP groups in your area to find playmates. I belong to a meet up group and have made some great friends. You could also check out your local library and see if they do story time. That is usually a popular activity for the preschool crowd.