What makes Texas Funny? (Dallas, Mesquite: condo, live, swimming)

[TXNGL]

My husband is from a small town in Missouri. I was born and raised in Dallas. We lived in Boston for 8 years before deciding to relocate to my hometown, this was almost 12 years ago. We hadn't been here long when my husband read an article about the beer drinking goat mayor of Lajitas and wanted to know if I knew about this. Why yes! I filled him in on the few details I knew, having never personally met the mayor. Hubby had a look on his face I'll never forget, something between horror and fascination. I decided I might as well nip it in the bud and make him face the fact that he was no longer in Kansas, or Missouri as the case was. After telling him about the mayor of Lajitas, I asked him, "Have I ever told you about Ralph the swimming pig of Aquarena Springs?" He started laughing and said, "That's it, I'm out of here!" Y'all, he still thinks we Texans are strange, but he's coming around. Several years later we went to Big Bend and introduced ourselves to the mayor of Lajitas.
I'd love to see a list of other absurdly funny things about Texas, besides the lege, so please add on!

[bluescreen73]

Well shoot you need look no further than the official roadkill of Texas for a good laugh - the armadillo.

[Cathy4017]

Originally Posted by bluescreen73

Well shoot you need look no further than the official roadkill of Texas for a good laugh - the armadillo.

And all of the recipes for using this roadkill......

[TexasTheKid]

We actually have a state reptile...

And it's called a horny toad.

[lonestar2007]

I guess they don't call Missouri the show me state for nothing. No headlines here, but we do have folks around where I live who keep bison and camels in the pastures with their cows. One person even has a zebra. llamas are common, but I get that, they help with protecting the livestock just like a donkey etc.

Tell your hubby the tale of Ol Rip, the horney toad who survived in a cornerstone/time capsule of Eastland's Courthouse for 37 years. If your hubby doesn't believe you, just take a quick trip out to the Eastland County Courthouse and show him.

[TXNGL]

Originally Posted by lonestar2007

I guess they don't call Missouri the show me state for nothing. No headlines here, but we do have folks around where I live who keep bison and camels in the pastures with their cows. One person even has a zebra. llamas are common, but I get that, they help with protecting the livestock just like a donkey etc.

Tell your hubby the tale of Ol Rip, the horney toad who survived in a cornerstone/time capsule of Eastland's Courthouse for 37 years. If your hubby doesn't believe you, just take a quick trip out to the Eastland County Courthouse and show him.

I was just reading about that sometime in the last couple of weeks, was it here? Maybe Texas Highways, maybe online...I just don't remember. I had never heard about Rip before that.

[GayleTX]

I have had a little ceramic replica of Rip for 30 years.....given to me by a friend from Cisco (near Eastland).

I may get this cut, but I have to share a Texas joke.......hope I don't get banned!! (Somebody may have to explain it to our northern friends).

Sex With A Cowboy

Prior to her trip to Texas , Buffy (a blonde New Yorker),
confided to her co-workers she had three goals for her trip to the Lone Star State -

1. She wanted to taste some real Texas Bar-B-Que.
2. She wanted to take in a bona fide rodeo. And..
3. She wanted to have sex with a real cowboy .

Upon returning, the girls were curious as to how she fared..

'Let me tell you, they have a tree down there called a Mesquite and when they slow cook that brisket over that Mesquite , it's ooooh so good. The taste is unbelievable!'

'And I went to a real rodeo. Talk about athletes... Those guys wrestle full grown bulls! They ride horses at a full gallop, then jump off the horses and grab the bull by the horns and throw them to the ground! It is just incredible!'

They then asked, 'Well tell us , did you have sex with a real cowboy?'

'Are you kidding? When I saw the outline of the condom they carry in the back pocket of their jeans, I changed my mind!'

[lonestar2007]

GayleTX, Great joke

[lonestar2007]

TXNGL, check out these sites!

Ol' Rip, The Entombed Horned Toad of The Eastland County Courthouse in Texas.


Texas Monthly: Read Me. Texas


Texas Twisted | Old Rip


History of Old Rip, the horny toad

There's tons of these sites.

We always played with horny toads when we were kids. We'd name them, keep them in shoeboxes with a little grass in there for them, feed them red ants, tie a string around their necks and take them for walks!

[case44]

Originally Posted by bluescreen73

Well shoot you need look no further than the official roadkill of Texas for a good laugh - the armadillo.

Originally Posted by Cathy4017

And all of the recipes for using this roadkill......

And all of the flour we'll need to bread and deep-fry that 'diller.