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Old 05-24-2014, 07:08 PM
 
283 posts, read 251,404 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by captain_hug99 View Post
I guess my husband and I are odd because I drive most of the time. Since I drive our daughter most, I have the larger more comfortable car, and I'm not the best passenger. I drive because it annoys him more to listen to me.

Plus, I'm the better driver and much better at directions than him.
I drive in our situation too. I'm a lousy passenger.
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Old 05-24-2014, 09:18 PM
 
Location: Victoria TX
42,663 posts, read 74,231,932 times
Reputation: 36087
Same reason men check the circuit breakers when the lights go out, or men put shims under the feet of wobbly book-cases. They grew up learning to deal with things that called for mechanical operations.

Men have to sit where they can see the dashboard, to monitor the warning lights and gauges. Men have to hold the wheel so they can tell if it is vibrating or pulling when braking. When the car starts going way over the speed limit, it's easier to take your foot off the gas yourself, than to tell someone else to and start an argument about what the speedometer says.

Also, men don't need to apply makeup while en-route to the destination.

Last edited by jtur88; 05-24-2014 at 09:28 PM..
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Old 05-24-2014, 09:33 PM
 
Location: SW MO
659 posts, read 1,003,633 times
Reputation: 673
Quote:
Originally Posted by StealthRabbit View Post
many reasons:
YMMV
  • Men are often very bossy 'back seat drivers' (his lady might not appreciate his 'Guidance')
  • Men are usually more nervous and want to be in control. (why are you going this way?)
  • Men are more driven (speed this thing up)
  • Men are not always equipped to keep the kids quiet and fed.
  • Gives them a 'sense of responsibility' / warrior / hero (except when they get lost or make a wrong turn)
  • The men are usually the 'fix-it- guys' who can better recognize and diagnose a mechanical irregularity (not always...)

Lady might want to be 'courted' / treated special... thus if she likes to drive... SHUT up and let her.
If she feels more special being driven, then shut up and LISTEN!

And don't drive like a maniac.
Enjoy the moment, it may be your last.
There are two of your reasons which have any truth to them- number 3 and 6. Number 6 is by far the biggest one. The other ones are absolute crap. But what do we expect from a guy who drives a stinking, smoking ~60 hp car he proudly notes is running on refuse from a choke 'n puke?

My experience with my wife, mother, sisters-in-law and the women I have worked around are strongly indicative that most women simply do not care about driving the same way most men don't particularly care about the exact kind of wallpaper put up in their house. They want it done in a reasonable manner but otherwise do not want to deal with it.

My wife is at least an average driver and can adeptly drive a vehicle with a manual transmission. She requests that I do the vast majority of the driving when we are together because she 1) generally falls asleep when the trip is longer than about 45 minutes 2) is bored by driving and would rather play games on her computer than drive and 3) would much, much rather sit with our daughter in the backseat and take care of her than drive.

To address your bullet points:

1. I sit back and only extremely rarely say anything about her driving, such as "a guy you can't see on my side of the car just merged into the lane you're signaling to merge into" which she equally says to me. I appreciate it as two pairs of eyes are better than one and crashes are inconvenient and aren't cheap.
2. I don't particularly care to be in control unless there is somebody who is dangerously incompetent in control. My wife most certainly is not incompetent, considering she taught me how to drive a stick in a car. (I didn't have the luck to have any cars with sticks when I grew up and she did.)
3. My wife does get somewhat distractable/bored and that is one of the big reasons I generally drive. That and she gets lulled asleep by car trips and would rather sleep and let me drive than fight the sleepies and continue to drive.
4. I do perfectly fine in keeping our daughter quiet and fed. My wife has said as such and like her I took off time for leave when she was little. My wife and I work as a team on this and I cribbed her notes on how to do this She does express a great desire to do quite a bit (but not all) of the care of our daughter, so I am not a jerk and don't fight her on this. There is still plenty of daddy-daughter time.
5. I am not afraid to ask/look up directions if I deviate from the pre-defined plan. Usually this entails taking a wrong turn or getting off course due to construction. That's why I always carry a recent atlas in the vehicles and look at it. I've asked directions from various random people over the years. It's a bigger deal to look like a complete f'in idiot in getting very lost because you didn't look at a map/ask for directions.
6. I am decidedly the gearhead/grease monkey in the relationship. I really enjoy it, she does not like it. My wife is very glad she does not have to deal with any of the mechanical parts of vehicle ownership and operation. I have showed her most of the basic things (how to check the oil, change a tire) on multiple occasions but she'd much rather have me take care of it. I suppose I'm the same with sewing and ironing. I've done that stuff before when I had to but it's pretty uninteresting.
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Old 05-24-2014, 11:23 PM
 
Location: East of the Sun, West of the Moon
15,504 posts, read 17,724,856 times
Reputation: 30796
When we took my father's car, he drove. When we took my mother's car, she drove. Pretty convenient system. They're Scandinavian and German. I don't know if that has anything to do with it.
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Old 05-25-2014, 02:21 AM
 
277 posts, read 149,588 times
Reputation: 1056
I've always been the driver in my marriage. I enjoy driving; my husband does not. I think growing up my mom did most of the driving, too.

When we moved from Massachusetts to Alaska, the plan was to take turns driving so we could cover the distance more quickly. About 6 hours in, I was ready for a break and had my husband take over. Two hours after that I was back in the driver's seat and I stayed there for the next 9 days, driving all but about 100 of the 4500 miles. :-)

I recently hurt my neck and the hubby had to drive for a while because I couldn't turn my head. It was so nice to be chauffeured around and enjoy the scenery for a few days!
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Old 05-25-2014, 07:43 AM
 
Location: Victoria TX
42,663 posts, read 74,231,932 times
Reputation: 36087
I once had a house guest from Germany, who was on her first visit to the USA. She asked me exactly the same question: "In America, how come the man always drives?"

My mother lied about her age in 1923 to get a drivers license. Still, my dad always did all the driving.
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Old 05-25-2014, 08:34 AM
 
1,266 posts, read 1,524,038 times
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Hmmm. I did most of the driving in my family. (I'm the Mom.)
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Old 05-25-2014, 09:51 AM
 
Location: San Antonio, Tx
7,663 posts, read 8,133,722 times
Reputation: 9235
Not only do I do all of the driving, she doesnt even drive my car. In our 16yrs together she has driven my car once and that was only to pick my up when I took her Camaro to have the windows tinted.

Driving is the one "me man, you woman" that I hold on to. Plus, she scares the **** out of me when she drives!
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Old 05-26-2014, 10:09 AM
 
4,800 posts, read 10,574,519 times
Reputation: 8290
Quote:
Originally Posted by PAinSC View Post
Even when I'm the passenger on road trips and my husband drives, I cannot relax because:

1. I fear he will fall asleep
This has been known to happen.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PhlR3vidvp0
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Old 05-26-2014, 10:40 AM
 
26,590 posts, read 54,577,614 times
Reputation: 13019
Quote:
Originally Posted by jtur88 View Post
Same reason men check the circuit breakers when the lights go out, or men put shims under the feet of wobbly book-cases. They grew up learning to deal with things that called for mechanical operations.

Men have to sit where they can see the dashboard, to monitor the warning lights and gauges. Men have to hold the wheel so they can tell if it is vibrating or pulling when braking. When the car starts going way over the speed limit, it's easier to take your foot off the gas yourself, than to tell someone else to and start an argument about what the speedometer says.

Also, men don't need to apply makeup while en-route to the destination.
Are you implying that a woman can't find/feel/fix the things a man can? Or worse yet that all woman put on makeup while driving?
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