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Yesterday I talked more with my coworkers about it, and last night have read some blogs on it. Now I'm having second thoughts about taking my wife until I have first had the chance to check out the country on my own. I don't want to have to worry about her there. And, with my short fuse, I'm likely to get into trouble because if someone ends up groping her on the street I'm going to punch them.
For those of who you have spent time in India, am I being overly concerned? I've heard that women are likely to be groped even if they are accompanied by men. In this case, it would be me and her brother who are with her.
I don't know. I'm going off of what my coworkers say. I've never been there, so I don't have a personal gauge to go by. I don't have a problem going there by myself, but I don't want problems if I take my wife.
I think you are over-concerned. I've been there with my female colleagues before and none of them had issues AS LONG as they are accompanied by a male and dress properly. These gropers are cowards most of them and won't make a move with a male present, even without a male present if you make a scene and yell at them in most cases they cower off like the cowards they are. "Eve teasing" they call it. It's just unfortunate one has to be aware of this behavior.
Remember thousands of visitors go to India daily and the vast majority leave without incident.
India isn't for everybody, especially if one has never traveled to an emerging economy nation, things are very foreign & in your face. That is also the attraction if one is open to new worlds.
Agreed. Even for experienced travelers India can be a real grind, sometimes a very frustrating place.
First time to India we were traveling around up north and didn't care for much of it, except Pushkar which for whatever reason struck our fancy despite the no meat or booze thing. Later spent a month in the south and found it way more to our liking, especially Kochi.
Agreed. Even for experienced travelers India can be a real grind, sometimes a very frustrating place.
First time to India we were traveling around up north and didn't care for much of it, except Pushkar which for whatever reason struck our fancy despite the no meat or booze thing. Later spent a month in the south and found it way more to our liking, especially Kochi.
It can also be tough on the stomach.
I'm hard on India in this thread I know, but I love visiting there. I just completed my fifth? sixth? Lost count how many trips. Food is excellent and it's just such a cultural shock to the western visitor that it tends to....wake up the senses for lack of a better term.
Where else can you drive down the road (not yourself but in a taxi or tuk tuk) and see cows, stray dogs, sheep, camel, water buffalo, horse, donkey, and the elephant or two, as part of traffic.
I'm a city boy so not comfortable or familiar with large animals, sometimes the cows in India are blocking the whole sidewalk and I'm at a loss for what to do. I don't want to pass in the front because big horns that look like could impale and leave me hanging there dead and limp while it continued happily eating trash, but don't want to go around back since have seen videos on youtube of cows kicking people into a low earth orbit.
I usually end just going into the street and playing dodge through traffic until past the cows. Sucks = can't even avenge myself at McDonalds since no hamburgers, although I did like the Mutton Whopper at Burger King. Nowhere near as good as local fare but sometimes you need a burger man.
I'm just saying what my coworkers are telling me and what I've been reading in blogs.
So not even original bias; bias you adopted from others. Understood.
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Originally Posted by Hefe
You're definitely being overly concerned. You searched for a specific result & found results to confirm your existing bias.
Precisely.
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Originally Posted by Hefe
That is also the attraction if one is open to new worlds.
And that is the crux of the issue. There are those who lean towards prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness and abhor the idea of people traveling the world and getting to know each other, and thereby undermining legacy suspicions and antipathies.
“Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts. Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things cannot be acquired by vegetating in one little corner of the earth all one's lifetime.” ― Mark Twain, The Innocents Abroad / Roughing It
You're definitely being overly concerned. You searched for a specific result & found results to confirm your existing bias.
I had no bias whatsoever. Then my coworkers (Indians) started warning me that women shouldn't go out at night, don't take desert tours at night because rapes happen, etc etc. Which was a real suprise to me, as I had never heard any of that about India before.
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Originally Posted by bUU
So not even original bias; bias you adopted from others.
Half of my office are from India. My neighborhood is about 80% Indian people. It's their own culture that they're talking about. I'm inclined to believe it's probably fairly accurate.
Understand something: my only concern here is the safety of my wife. If it were just me going there, I wouldn't be concerned and I wouldn't be having this discussion.
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I didn't care for India but most people with an open mind & a good itinerary find it at least fascinating & eye-opening.
I have no doubt about this, and I have no problem going there myself (I am a guy.)
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Originally Posted by Dd714
I think you are over-concerned. I've been there with my female colleagues before and none of them had issues AS LONG as they are accompanied by a male
Good to know. I figure this is probably the case. (But with 3,000 reported rapes in Delhi alone last year, it seems there are problems. I'm trying to get a feel for the true scope of the problems in every day life.)
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Originally Posted by Huckleberry3911948
Americans have taught this generation to be fearless
Fearless and defenseless is a bad combination
Excellent words. Sums things up very neatly!
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Originally Posted by Dd714
Rep for sugarcoating what is a serious issue? I hope you are being sarcastic.
I had no bias whatsoever. Then my coworkers (Indians) started warning me that women shouldn't go out at night, don't take desert tours at night because rapes happen, etc etc. Which was a real suprise to me, as I had never heard any of that about India before.
Half of my office are from India. My neighborhood is about 80% Indian people. It's their own culture that they're talking about. I'm inclined to believe it's probably fairly accurate.
Understand something: my only concern here is the safety of my wife. If it were just me going there, I wouldn't be concerned and I wouldn't be having this discussion.
Why not just visit the southern parts of India, and avoid the northern part of India (where this problem is primarily located)? There are plenty of interesting things to see and do in southern India, and for women it's safer.
Why not just visit the southern parts of India, and avoid the northern part of India (where this problem is primarily located)? There are plenty of interesting things to see and do in southern India, and for women it's safer.
That's a possibility. We fly into Delhi. Then maybe we'll go directly to the Taj Mahal, then from there go directly to south India.
That's a possibility. We fly into Delhi. Then maybe we'll go directly to the Taj Mahal, then from there go directly to south India.
I was in Taj exactly one week ago, second time there. If you fly in from the US I recommend a day just to get over the jet lag. Visit Taj when you are fresh. Taj now is about a 3 hour drive from Delhi (newly completed highways, used to take much longer). You can do it in a day from Delhi, most convenient approach is just to hire car from hotel, cost - about $100/14,000 r. for couple that includes driver for the day, tour guide, s/b 3 stops including Red Fort in Agra. Of course the tour guide takes you to these carpet shops as well, and the "star of india" jewelry shops. Just say no, or yes, per your discretion. Leave about 6 or 7AM, driver brings you back same day to your hotel. Give both driver and tour guide a tip when you are done - 500 to 1,000 rupees.
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