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Old 04-18-2010, 02:44 PM
 
Location: Victoria TX
42,663 posts, read 74,292,936 times
Reputation: 36087

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We were trying to cross the vast Magdalena, in northern Colombia. The bus let off in Magangue, and we were told it was necessary to take a taxi to the ferry, where an onward bus existed. Asking how far was it to the ferry, we were told 15 minutes. Well, a 15 minute walk is nothing, even with our packs, so we started walking. And walking. And walking, taxis speeding by us the whole time. Finally we stopped at a house where an old man was enjoyng a cool drink on his porch. He explained that it is 15 minutes by taxi. (It's always 100 degrees there and nobody walks anywhere) and he gave us a cool drink and hailed an empty taxi going the other way, which took us to the ferry.
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Old 04-18-2010, 03:01 PM
 
3,509 posts, read 5,178,107 times
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I had been in Bangkok just a little under a day and was feeling overwhelmed by the excitement of being there, the heat, the smells, the traffic and a bad case of jet lag. Our hotel offered a spa with massage services and I thought that would be just the thing to relax me and work the kinks out. I imagined candles or incense, a comfy massage bed, low lighting, soft music and a gentle but firm massage - just like at home in the US. What I got was flourescent lighting, air conditioning at Arctic levels, a hard mat on the floor and a Thai masseuse that who turned me very which way but loose. She twisted my limbs in directions I never thought they could go, pushed me and pulled me and ignored my cries of pain. She walked on my back, dug into every muscle with her elbow and then wrung me out like a dishrag. When it was all over I paid up and staggered back to our room. It was only then that I burst into hysterical laughter as I told my friend all about it. Oddly enough I slept like a baby that night and was up at dawn to start my fantastic vacation in Thailand!
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Old 04-18-2010, 05:58 PM
 
9,950 posts, read 11,942,632 times
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Wink SeaWorld....lol...

Okay.. I went to Sea World with my family many years ago.

I walked over to the Dolphin Pens and the Dolphins were swimming around happily. I was at such peace ....so anyway... I had some fish ( the kind you buy there) and I threw a small fish at one of the Dolphins and he happily ate it up and did a great dance ! WOW !

That was cool ! So I threw another one, lol....and another Dolphin jumped out of the water in mid air ! Wow this is SO COOL ! So then suddenly I heard a man scream at me " HEY WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING !! ???? " I said " I am feeding the Dolphins ? "...with a smile...He yelled really loud " GET AWAY FROM THE DOLPHINS !!! YOU ARE RUINING a LIFETIME OF TRAINING !....Ooops...I felt mortified....They train the Dolphins with the small fish. They get the fish AFTER they do the trick !

I walked away with a very red face. I was young at the time...
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Old 04-19-2010, 08:36 AM
 
12,299 posts, read 18,421,290 times
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I learned that the term "rubber band" is called "elastics" in New Zealand. Went to a hotel front desk, with some people behind us, and asked simply for a "rubber band". Got a very strange look. They and all the locals behind us thought we were asking for a condom.
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Old 04-19-2010, 01:40 PM
 
32,532 posts, read 30,676,091 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dd714 View Post
I learned that the term "rubber band" is called "elastics" in New Zealand. Went to a hotel front desk, with some people behind us, and asked simply for a "rubber band". Got a very strange look. They and all the locals behind us thought we were asking for a condom.
Funny. Neither Australians nor Kiwis speak what we Americans would call English. I get letter from my friends Down Under and practically have to get them translated.

My story: We had just arrived in Amsterdam after a 23 hour flight from L.A. (A whole other story.) I was exhausted and wanted to nap but my not-yet husband decided he wanted to see the sights so he got in a cab and asked the driver to take him where things were "happening". (This was the 70's) The cabbie promptly took him to the Red Light District.



Nothing happened.


He swears!
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Old 04-19-2010, 01:43 PM
 
Location: Middle Tennessee
187,012 posts, read 76,925,708 times
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Trying to ask for a large wrench in my limited Spanish and getting a Machete instead. I have to learn to many things the hard way.
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Old 04-19-2010, 02:27 PM
 
Location: In the Pearl of the Purchase, Ky
7,426 posts, read 12,954,771 times
Reputation: 31015
In my high school years in the 70s I was in a city wide youth choir that went to Florida to sing. Before singing at the Christian Church in Ocala, I needed to go to the bathroom. I saw a little boy, probably around 8 or 9, and asked him where the rest room was. He looked at me a little funny and told me to follow him. He took me to the nursery! He said he thinks people rest there. I told him I mean the BATH room! He grinned real big and took me right to it!
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Old 04-19-2010, 07:56 PM
 
Location: Back in the gym...Yo Adrian!
9,369 posts, read 18,022,288 times
Reputation: 18406
While leaving a hotel in Ecuador, a bunch of street kids were waving at me shouting "American, American", so I waved back and smiled. My friend who spoke fluent Spanish informed me that they were actually shouting "Maricon, Maricon" which was Spanish for fa@ggot.

There were many "misunderstandings" as I was getting fluent in Spanish during my stay in South America.
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Old 04-19-2010, 11:12 PM
 
Location: Victoria TX
42,663 posts, read 74,292,936 times
Reputation: 36087
My wife discovered that the Mandarin Chinese words for 'toilet paper' and 'sanitary napkins' are so similar, the English-speaking ear cannot discern the difference. Which led to some hilarious sign language in the drug store. Luckily, she was a drama major, and doesn't know the meaning of the word stage fright in any language. What added to the frustration, is that in China, if one doesn't understand the spoken language, the speaker just writes it down, since Chinese characters mean the same thing, no matter what spoken language is used. They usually just draw the character in the air with their finger, if any verbal confusion occurs. The scene in the drug store looked like a convention of deaf people on a laughing jag.
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Old 04-20-2010, 03:06 AM
 
5,823 posts, read 10,159,161 times
Reputation: 4536
As a kid I did a family vacation in **** (today's Croatia). As a second-grader I was learning German, and there were a lot of German tourists in our hotel.
I was endeavouring to take a shower, when I noticed that I didn't have soap, so I knocked on the door in front , there was a German lady behind, she was cautious, didn't open, so I whispered through the door in my best German : 'haben sie [goddamm how do you say "soap" in German-I couldn't recall] soap", "please, haben sie soap"; the lady : "was? was ist das ? gehen sie weg! " ["what? what are
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