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Old 06-26-2011, 10:55 AM
 
94 posts, read 39,181 times
Reputation: 28

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Quote:
Originally Posted by jasper12 View Post
No one forces anyone to have children, and keep them. If you can't take care of one...why does she have three? I have never understood parents like that. There is such a thing as birth control, that works...and it is basically free at many clinics.

I think that there is more to this story...I used to work in public assistance, and often women would abuse the childcare money, and then have overpayments, and not be eligible for child care assitance...there is always more to these stories than the sensationalism...
Once the children are born, it's not their fault so why should we punish them? I think this attitude toward parents is really cold. If the woman didn't have a job then folks would complain that she was too lazy to work. She seems to be caught between a rock and a hard place.

Why immediately distrust her? Give her the benefit of the doubt until you know she is blowing childcare money. She didn't leave her kids like that to out drinking and partying. Btw, birth control doesn't always work and funding for planned parenthood is being cut, so maybe birth control is not "basically free."
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Old 06-26-2011, 11:08 AM
 
1,617 posts, read 2,468,866 times
Reputation: 1352
She seems to be caught between a rock and a hard place.

Quote:
Why immediately distrust her? Give her the benefit of the doubt until you know she is blowing childcare money. She didn't leave her kids like that to out drinking and partying. Btw, birth control doesn't always work and funding for planned parenthood is being cut, so maybe birth control is not "basically free."
I agree with you --- not all moms have sufficient support, i.e. family who can watch kids while she is working; she did in fact, go to work; she did in fact, with the best she could do keep them together so they would not be hurt [as I previously wrote, perhaps not the wisest thinking re: temperature]....

And to give an example of that very thing -- I did something similar several years ago [moderately humerous now, was not at the time].... I had picked up my mom and we were going out for lunch, doing some shopping, running some errands -- I had the air conditioning in the car so it was really really cool - as she was tired and preferred to stay in the car, and as I was only dashing into the store for maybe 5 mins - 10 at the most, I left in the car, very comfortable w/the coolness of the air conditioner.

Of course, I automatically turned the car off, took the keys, without thinking clicked the key chain which automatically locked the car was well and went into the store. I was gone probably 12 minutes and when I got back to the car, my mom was beginning to roast, she could not open the windows etc.........so...and I was a grown up [smile]...and although fortunately I was only gone a very short time...it could have been disaster...it took me hours to forgive myself no less the apologies I made to my mom.....
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Old 06-26-2011, 11:18 AM
 
94 posts, read 39,181 times
Reputation: 28
Quote:
Originally Posted by sugarmaple View Post
She seems to be caught between a rock and a hard place.



I agree with you --- not all moms have sufficient support, i.e. family who can watch kids while she is working; she did in fact, go to work; she did in fact, with the best she could do keep them together so they would not be hurt [as I previously wrote, perhaps not the wisest thinking re: temperature]....

And to give an example of that very thing -- I did something similar several years ago [moderately humerous now, was not at the time].... I had picked up my mom and we were going out for lunch, doing some shopping, running some errands -- I had the air conditioning in the car so it was really really cool - as she was tired and preferred to stay in the car, and as I was only dashing into the store for maybe 5 mins - 10 at the most, I left in the car, very comfortable w/the coolness of the air conditioner.

Of course, I automatically turned the car off, took the keys, without thinking clicked the key chain which automatically locked the car was well and went into the store. I was gone probably 12 minutes and when I got back to the car, my mom was beginning to roast, she could not open the windows etc.........so...and I was a grown up [smile]...and although fortunately I was only gone a very short time...it could have been disaster...it took me hours to forgive myself no less the apologies I made to my mom.....
I'm sure that incident must have really scared you! Taking my keys out and locking the car is so automatic to me I almost never realize I'm doing it.

Wonder what the final outcome will be for the mom in this case? Will she get her children back? Maybe this incident will prompt getting the help for her she needs with childcare so she can work.
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Old 06-26-2011, 11:23 AM
 
Location: Northern CA
12,770 posts, read 9,863,825 times
Reputation: 4243
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fritos View Post
Once the children are born, it's not their fault so why should we punish them? I think this attitude toward parents is really cold. If the woman didn't have a job then folks would complain that she was too lazy to work. She seems to be caught between a rock and a hard place.

Why immediately distrust her? Give her the benefit of the doubt until you know she is blowing childcare money. She didn't leave her kids like that to out drinking and partying. Btw, birth control doesn't always work and funding for planned parenthood is being cut, so maybe birth control is not "basically free."
You make me want to tear my hair out - how can you make excuses for this breeder? Now she and her children will be dependents of the State. This is what you call empowering women? She is not the victim, her children are victims of her stupidity.
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Old 06-26-2011, 11:27 AM
 
94 posts, read 39,181 times
Reputation: 28
Quote:
Originally Posted by claudhopper View Post
You make me want to tear my hair out - how can you make excuses for this breeder? Now she and her children will be dependents of the State. This is what you call empowering women?
"breeder"? Depersonalize much? Does that make it easier to hate? I think you misunderstand the concept of empowering women.

I'm not making excuses. I'm offering alternative thoughts about the situation. I don't have an immediate negative bias about poor working women who have children who have no support.
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Old 06-26-2011, 11:40 AM
 
Location: Northern CA
12,770 posts, read 9,863,825 times
Reputation: 4243
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fritos View Post
"breeder"? Depersonalize much? Does that make it easier to hate? I think you misunderstand the concept of empowering women.

I'm not making excuses. I'm offering alternative thoughts about the situation. I don't have an immediate negative bias about poor working women who have children who have no support.
You are making excuses when you blame this on her supposed lack of support. All she needed to do is ask for help, she is clearly incompetent. These situations are becoming more commonplace, and you want to blame society, rather than individuals that lack common sense.
Animals care for their young based on instinct and training from their mother, even insects know better - humans can be the lowest life form on this planet. I am beyond disgusted.
Here's another great example of mother in da hood.
[LEFT]Cops: Woman Locked 5 Kids in Closet, 2 Died



Read more: Cops: Woman Locked 5 Kids in Closet, 2 Died - CBS News
[/LEFT]
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Old 06-26-2011, 11:48 AM
 
1,617 posts, read 2,468,866 times
Reputation: 1352
I do not think, and correct me if I am wrong Fritos, that neither one of us is exonerating this mom/woman completely - it was a poor choice - I, personally, am not saying that it is a blame society/lack of family / lack of friends kinda situation either - I have been saying perhaps [which I think is an optimal word] there is more than we are aware of and of course there are moms who don't care about their children, there are moms who severely hurt their children [heck, there is a HUGE murder case going on right now -smile], I am saying that judgments are not appropriate until all of the facts are clear AND if this is exactly because of a poor choice/decision AND still going to work, well, I don't think it is far to lump this mom into the kettle of fish/soup with those moms who do not care....
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Old 06-26-2011, 11:54 AM
 
Location: Land of Free Johnson-Weld-2016
6,473 posts, read 13,978,569 times
Reputation: 6436
Quote:
Originally Posted by redfish1 View Post
BFD!
My mom used to lock me and my sister in an animal crate and set it in the sun on the back patio for hours on end as punishment in the summer when we lived in plam desert CA and nobody ever though anything of it. I remember having to urinate on one another just to cool down.......LOL
kids these days have it to easy. It's amazing how PC this country is getting
LOL Ok this is a sad story, but you cracked me up!
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Old 06-26-2011, 12:00 PM
 
15,074 posts, read 13,680,762 times
Reputation: 6934
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fritos View Post
Once the children are born, it's not their fault so why should we punish them? I think this attitude toward parents is really cold. If the woman didn't have a job then folks would complain that she was too lazy to work. She seems to be caught between a rock and a hard place.

Why immediately distrust her? Give her the benefit of the doubt until you know she is blowing childcare money. She didn't leave her kids like that to out drinking and partying.
Can someone explain to me please, how is it possible to "blow childcare money?"
Is she like... getting cash from the state to pay for the daycare?
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Old 06-26-2011, 12:02 PM
 
1,617 posts, read 2,468,866 times
Reputation: 1352
I thought that childcare funds went directly to the child care facility, doesn't it?
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