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Obviously there's a reason that Burke was so abnormal. It sounds like he was the centre of attention until Jon Bennet was born, and then Burke was in the background (even in photos) while his sister was all his mother thought about. As a child, he was insanely jealous, and nothing was done to balance the attention for the two children. He cried out for help in ways only known to 7 year old children, and continued with those behaviors until he was nearly 10.
What I realized after the show was that Burke was interviewed at age 11, 13 months after the murder, so he was one month shy of 10 years old at the time of the murder - very close to the age where he could be held accountable for the murder.
He needed attention from his mother, not camp. Patsy must have known that, but she was unable to help herself from ignoring Burke, and showering attention on Jonbenet.
Yes those family photos bug me in more ways too. There are a lot of Patsy with the kids, but no John. He really didn't seem to be a big part of the family. I guess he was busy, but I have a feeling those photos represented the reality that he wasn't home much. And the video of the three of them at Christmas without John. Who makes a family holiday video without Dad unless he's overseas in the military or in prison?
Too bad John didn't have more time to spend with Burke to ease the jealousy he must have felt over JonBenet getting all the attention. All older siblings I've been around have always had some jealousy over younger siblings, even when they're not sucking up all of Mom's time. I have a feeling Burke's resentment just kept building and building with nobody trying to spend time with him or make him feel special. He certainly tried to tell them something was wrong in the way most 9 year olds do -- acting out.
I thought it was a really crappy and cheesy show; were the first two episodes like this? Of course, it IS network TV, so they had to dumb it down and rachet up the drama... :P Surprised seasoned professionals sunk this low, but I guess anything for money... Funny how they kept "making notes" on their pads while others were talking, haha! Worthless...
I thought was stupid when they had camera recording it.
She was six. Isn't that how all six year olds behave? At that age the universe DOES revolve around you.
That said, there were definitely problems in that family. The girl was still wetting her bed, and the boy smeared feces all over.
He hit her with that golf club purposely. He was insanely jealous of her. Yet his parents always said how well they got along. Burke said she used to purposely break his toys. And John pipes up but oh, Burke didn't mind when she did that! Bull! John is still in protection/cover up mode.
No, that's how three year olds act. A six year old who has been in school, pageants, and dealing with a sibling should act with more compassion. When I used to work at a summer camp, I was with older kids, but I saw enough of the six years to know any child of six that this antagonistic would be asked to leave. She was a very socialized six year old to not know the "rules of the playground" (i.e. how to socialize with other kids even a few years older). Her brother may have had mental issues and her mother was allowing her to pick on him instead of telling her to play nice with him. I'm not blaming her, I'm blaming John and Patsy. It also furthers my theory John was more invested emotionally in his first marriage.
It was as recent as Christmas Day Burke had wiped his feces all over a box of chocolates JonBenet got for Christmas. What is the worst thing you could do to someone? That is an extreme form of hate for a 9 year old. They found pieces of Burke's **** all of JonBenet's room. If I had a child that did that I would probably go berserk and insane. To me, smearing your **** on your sister's toys is the lowest form of scum behavior. I would've put Burke in a children's home or had him going to some kind of camp for boys.
I agree they should have helped him more, but the parents were the reason he acted the way he did.
She is because clearly her brother had issues and she would antagonize him. It was probably allowed to go on because Patsy favored her. They both had issues and obnoxious personalities because of the way they were raised.
If Burke was smearing feces on JonBenet's stuff, he deserved everything she said or did to him. He sounds like a bully. I hope she stood up for herself! I would go ballistic.
If Patsy really favored JonBenet, then more would've beeen done about JonBenet's personal stuff being ruined.
Location: Finally the house is done and we are in Port St. Lucie!
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With the way that Burke acted and even JonBenet's bed wetting, we can agree that it was a dysfunctional family. To the outside world, the dysfunction is hidden. That we can see even by the many posts right here on CD in the Non-Romantic Relationship forum. The outside world does not know what is going on in the family. I think that some of the Ramsey friends had a good inkling though.
As a child growing up in a dysfunctional family, there was sibling rivalry between my older sister and myself. She was the 'baby doll' in my mother's eyes, until I came along. I then became the new 'doll' to play with and shower with attention. There was jealousy and meanness coming from her towards me. At one point, she threw an empty metal coffee can at me and hit me in the head. Gashed it open quite nicely. I was taken to a grandparents house and it was treated with a gauze bandage (after cutting the hair away in a nice patch) and my sister threatened and begged to not tell anyone at school how it happened. I do admit to pestering her before the can was thrown. No, I was not a spoiled child by any means. Another child came along to replace me and yet another one to replace that one. You may even have considered us 'white trash' at the time.
Kids that grow up in dysfunctional families are very troubled. Some are able to rise above while others, not so much.
I can totally see Burke doing things to JonBenet. Maybe my personal experiences make my reasoning biased. Even though it does happen more than we think and know.
I started out at the beginning of this thread with my mind set on it being an intruder. I even couldn't get myself to even consider that Burke would do this. The scenario that the CBS show came up with is very plausible and certainly Burke's actions and hesitations during his interviews were very telling to me. He knew at the age of 9 what happened. I do not believe that he meant to kill her, any more than my sister wanted to kill me. It was a reflex action to get the person to stop. An anger driven action that is almost impossible for a child to control when they have never been taught to control or had any counseling to help them deal with that anger.
As he aged, he most assuredly came to realize that the truth must never be revealed. Probably at the urging of his parents. The longer the truth is hidden successfully.... It is almost like Burke is smiling like "I know a secret and you don't and never will".
Obviously there's a reason that Burke was so abnormal. It sounds like he was the centre of attention until Jon Bennet was born, and then Burke was in the background (even in photos) while his sister was all his mother thought about. As a child, he was insanely jealous, and nothing was done to balance the attention for the two children. He cried out for help in ways only known to 7 year old children, and continued with those behaviors until he was nearly 10.
What I realized after the show was that Burke was interviewed at age 11, 13 months after the murder, so he was one month shy of 10 years old at the time of the murder - very close to the age where he could be held accountable for the murder.
He needed attention from his mother, not camp. Patsy must have known that, but she was unable to help herself from ignoring Burke, and showering attention on Jonbenet.
I didn't like in the Christmas tour video when she introduced Jonbenet and was all happy and then introduced Burke like here whatever. Patsy and John were bad parents.
I started thinking, after reading the last couple pages -- "but JonBenet often went to sleep with Burke in order to feel safe, didn't she?"
Oh, wait! This was another cover up lie, wasn't it? The golf club was an accident, we're a gentle family, Burke didn't at all mind his sister deliberately breaking his Legos, there was no sibling rivalry, and to prove it, JonBenet went to him to feel safe in the night.
Geez, I'll bet it only took a year or so for John and Patsy to regret the cover up. So many things to lie about, so many things to hide, not just about that one night, but about the previous 4 years or so too.
DrrrP says Burke doesn't have autism or anything like that. So I guess that constant smile is reflex to cover up what's really inside. The things he has to guard. All those lies. He couldn't tell anyone how he really felt about his sister, or someone could think he was the culprit.
I started thinking, after reading the last couple pages -- "but JonBenet often went to sleep with Burke in order to feel safe, didn't she?"
Oh, wait! This was another cover up lie, wasn't it? The golf club was an accident, we're a gentle family, Burke didn't at all mind his sister deliberately breaking his Legos, there was no sibling rivalry, and to prove it, JonBenet went to him to feel safe in the night.
Geez, I'll bet it only took a year or so for John and Patsy to regret the cover up. So many things to lie about, so many things to hide, not just about that one night, but about the previous 4 years or so too.
DrrrP says Burke doesn't have autism or anything like that. So I guess that constant smile is reflex to cover up what's really inside. The things he has to guard. All those lies. He couldn't tell anyone how he really felt about his sister, or someone could think he was the culprit.
If he does have autism, he might not have been diagnosed. He's at the age, my age should I would know, before it was common to label everyone. Google adult autism. A lot of adults 35 and older found out they were on the spectrum later on in life because they weren't severe and slipped through the cracks. Also, I would think with his family, they wouldn't want to put him in special ed or diagnosis him.
If he does have autism, he might not have been diagnosed. He's at the age, my age should I would know, before it was common to label everyone. Google adult autism. A lot of adults 35 and older found out they were on the spectrum later on in life because they weren't severe and slipped through the cracks. Also, I would think with his family, they wouldn't want to put him in special ed or diagnosis him.
True, but DrrrP made it sound like his current interactions with Burke at 29 convinced him he did not have autism. I hope he would not have definitively declared that without having him evaluated by a competent professional.
At this point it seems like it would be to the Ramsey's advantage to say Burke does have Asperger's or autism. That would be a harmless explanation for his inappropriate expressions. That diagnosis would have shut down a lot of this chatter and speculation. The Internet wouldn't have been quite so harsh in their criticisms of Burke. So my guess is that he really doesn't have it.
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