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Old 10-18-2013, 10:28 PM
 
1,848 posts, read 2,529,815 times
Reputation: 3646

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Ok, i don't want to take away from the other law of attraction thread on here but this was such a discovery to me that I felt it had to have its own thread. I think sometimes the overall philosophy overwhelms a beginner with its inferred simplicity, and as anyone who has worked with this knows it can be a slippery creature to stay on top of. SO discovering this amazing tangled mess in my mind I realized that no MATTER how much i used LOA i was riddled with some deep-seated self-defeatism that needed a little more prodding to come out into the light of day. if you don't know you are working against yourself, you might be wasting energy that could be put toward a clearer process of manifestation.

i sat down to write a list of wants, but decided to kind of worm my way around my mind and get down on paper those things i really truly didn't want, to get it out of my system and look at my fears, and then contrast that with a list of things that i wanted. pretty easy and typical probably.

what i found so strange tho, was that once i had written down everything (and i really got down on it-it took a couple of hours of typing and i type fast) it was glaringly obvious that there were defeatist beliefs running all through my wants.

i have been an artist of one form or another for most of my life, and i have always been deeply involved in some project or calling or another. but a couple years ago i actively gave up trying to make money at art because i conjectured that to make money at art i would have to play in clubs i hated, work with bands i didn't like, or otherwise have to do alot of not-fun things (not hard work, i like work, i mean be around stuff that didn't resonate with me) and i really wanted to be in complete control of my creative output. i didn't want to compromise or collaborate, wait on any more band members to show up, or make videos for bands whose music i wasn't likely to listen to after the video was over. i wanted COMPLEte control and responsibility for my art. of course in my mind that meant i would never make any money. so i started school and am in my third semester studying to become an engineer. because engineers make money and artists always live on ramen unless they are typical tacky rock stars and go to hollywood parties, and that is NOT me. prejudiced much, one may ask? defeatist much?
move on to my want list. i had written something to the effect that i wanted a decent little job that would afford me plenty of time for school as well as pay my bills (which are very small). i stated specifically that my ideal job would be something that didn't give me a lot of mental headaches, something just mindless like being a dishwasher, because i KNEW that i couldn't make any real money because i wasn't willing to handle all the responsibility of a real job, and an office wasn't likely to hire me on a part time basis, so i didn't need much, just another crap job that wouldn't allow me to get ahead.
i saw immediately that in BOTH lists was this same wish- "i don't want to make money". basically, that was the underpinning. it absolutely shocked me, really, that i had wanted complete responsibility on the one hand, and NO responsibility on the other, but in my mind they both equated to "can't make money"! talk about a load of crap! it was such a given in my mind that i didn't even question it til i really started mulling over my specific wants and needs, and really linking them together. it felt like doing equations in physics class...."this cancels that". once you removed the cancellations and self defeatism three things shone clear- i wanted my education, i wanted to take care of my mother and uncle, and i wanted to be abundant financially AND creatively.

from there i was able to really get down and accept the possibility that i had been going about it ALL wrong. i was basically slamming my foot on the gas pedal and the car was just bearing down on a wall. i wasn't going anywhere. i had a powerful defeatist belief lying inside me that i hadn't rooted out, and it was working on my choices unconsciously the whole time. i would have NEVER discovered that had i not gone much more in depth in my want/don't want lists than i had ever done before. look at one list, then another, and distill it. you may make the same discovery that i did, that you are working against yourself in deep ways that you never even realized. that same energy could be going towards precisely the thoughts that will get you what you want instead of accelerating right into a wall without stopping.

and it doesn't seem to be just a matter of listing what you want....why do you want it? why do you want THAT and not that? do you NOT want something because of some innate prejudice that you have developed that has told you it isn't possible to have what you want without having what you DON'T want? have you grown comfortable believing that "of course, i can't make money doing something i love, and am good at, because that so rarely happens?" or, "i'd like to have a nicer life but i would be happy with just a few changes because i don't really believe that big stuff can happen...." it seems the more stream-of-consciousness you go with it, and just let it flow, the more discoveries you can make by simply comparing and contrasting.

i think then, of course, its important to draw up another list, and that is the one you can truly focus on with clarity, knowing its been cleared of your own hidden worst intentions. it was certainly a powerful exercise for me, and i hope it helps someone else!!!
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Old 10-20-2013, 01:16 PM
 
Location: Under the Redwoods
3,738 posts, read 5,323,804 times
Reputation: 5881
Lists are a great tool for so many things. A to do list, a shopping list- you can forget your shopping list at home and still be able to get near everything on the list because the action of writing it leaves a stronger impression in our memory.

Writing is also a neccissary tool in LOA. There is a connection to the use of the muscles in the hand and arm that have an energy building aspect.
Visually we can see the 'errors' a lot better. How did we really word something and is that wording conducive to the goal and desire?

On a less LOA platform, I can totally relate to writing things so that I can be rid of them. It's a burden lifted when I get all that nasty wonderings and emotions on to paper. It makes it less ethereal and more tangible. And we know how to get rid of tangible things. We can throw it in the garbage, shred it, burn it, flush it...what ever! It's all 'good riddance' to the negitive.

Now back to LOA.
We are so conditioned from society with blinders on to boot. We are told that in order to accomplish 'that', we have to do 'this'. And we are told that doing 'xyz' is worthless and a dead end. We are handed a map and told to stay on the main roads.
Bbbzzztt!!!! Wrong!
Do what you love and love what you do and the rest will follow.
There will be some means to an end that no one standing on the outside would not understand at all.
I had a friend who would get so frustrated with me. I was in a hard way because it was what I needed to do to get out of a worse situation. Most people in my situation at that time would have taken different steps, 'common logical' steps. Not me.
I was 'carefree' and that was what frustrated him. He could never understand how things came and happened so easily for me.
I think he was one of those people who way over think things and try to work out what is the absolute solution. But that never works. One has to be carefree and just focus on the end results desired.
It's not I need to make more money for a new car, it's not I need to find the extra cash to repair my car...it's simply...I want a dependable and sound running car. It does not matter how that happens.
But an outsider would look at that person driving the POS car and wonder why they are not at a dealership signing finance papers.
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Old 10-20-2013, 11:05 PM
 
1,848 posts, read 2,529,815 times
Reputation: 3646
Quote:
Originally Posted by OwlKaMyst View Post
Lists are a great tool for so many things. A to do list, a shopping list- you can forget your shopping list at home and still be able to get near everything on the list because the action of writing it leaves a stronger impression in our memory.

Writing is also a neccissary tool in LOA. There is a connection to the use of the muscles in the hand and arm that have an energy building aspect.
Visually we can see the 'errors' a lot better. How did we really word something and is that wording conducive to the goal and desire?

On a less LOA platform, I can totally relate to writing things so that I can be rid of them. It's a burden lifted when I get all that nasty wonderings and emotions on to paper. It makes it less ethereal and more tangible. And we know how to get rid of tangible things. We can throw it in the garbage, shred it, burn it, flush it...what ever! It's all 'good riddance' to the negitive.

Now back to LOA.
We are so conditioned from society with blinders on to boot. We are told that in order to accomplish 'that', we have to do 'this'. And we are told that doing 'xyz' is worthless and a dead end. We are handed a map and told to stay on the main roads.
Bbbzzztt!!!! Wrong!
Do what you love and love what you do and the rest will follow.
There will be some means to an end that no one standing on the outside would not understand at all.
I had a friend who would get so frustrated with me. I was in a hard way because it was what I needed to do to get out of a worse situation. Most people in my situation at that time would have taken different steps, 'common logical' steps. Not me.
I was 'carefree' and that was what frustrated him. He could never understand how things came and happened so easily for me.
I think he was one of those people who way over think things and try to work out what is the absolute solution. But that never works. One has to be carefree and just focus on the end results desired.
It's not I need to make more money for a new car, it's not I need to find the extra cash to repair my car...it's simply...I want a dependable and sound running car. It does not matter how that happens.
But an outsider would look at that person driving the POS car and wonder why they are not at a dealership signing finance papers.
YES to all this, including lists....and writing. i have been keeping a diary/journal since i was 12, and tho i don't have my journals up to the age of 18 (due to an evil roommate situation where they kept all my stuff) i still have all of them from 18 til now and i am 40. i have found reading my old diaries INCREDIBLY useful in so many ways. you see all kinds of patterns and learn so much about yourself.
when i moved out to california from ga in 2006 i packed my van with only the most necessary items, leaving my journals behind. last year i was able to go and get them all and read them for the first time since moving here. it was such an incredible eye-opener, so much that i actually ended one of my oldest friendships because i realized i had been complaining about him in exactly the same way since i met him when i was 19. it was bleakly hilarious to find myself saying the exact same phrases to describe him, the exact same complaints- so i turned away from him and it lightened my life.
i also grew in admiration of myself. i wasn't some simpering whiny teenager or twenty-something. i had really been thinking about things and wasn't far off the mark most of the time, at least in regards to how i felt about the world at large. but of course diaries are also for self torture and i realized i had been doing the same little number all those years as i was doing this week. the same pit, the same pattern.

i had another idea today about how to use a journal in more creative ways to reframe your thought process. on the right-hand side of the page, you have your normal stuff you write about with no higher ideal in mind, just the things you feel like writing about. you don't place any stops on yourself and you get out what is really bubbling up, negative stuff and all. you write only on the right hand side and leave the other backside blank. later on, maybe the same day or the same week, you read it over and find the negative patterns that crop up and reframe them on the other side of the page. kind of like a yin and yang approach, but with a conscious reframing for the positive, trying on a different headspace as it were. of course, eventually, you get better and everything stays on a positive, solid framework in your mind so that coaching yourself so consciously is not necessary all the time. but even keeping the habit of leaving the opposite page blank seems to have an interesting symbolism too, when you think about it. its sort of like saying "this is how i am feeling now but this could change". it could help weave out bad mental hygiene and give you something of an open door at all times to accept that maybe how i see it right now is not quite the way it is- which starts to bring in the whole quantum wonderland of "you are what you decide to see". it really is that. reframe, decide the world is a friendly place and filled with abundance, and it WILL be.
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Old 10-20-2013, 11:43 PM
 
Location: Under the Redwoods
3,738 posts, read 5,323,804 times
Reputation: 5881
Patterns are a kicker and can be good or bad. They are the proverbial bread crumbs that lead us... Either back home or to the evil witche's house. Which way to go?
But they are there for us to see if we take the time to look.

I am aware that I have issues and weaknesses as well as ways of looking at things that are deeply engrained in my thinking.
Some I know very well the source, some I am just aware of their presence but have yet to pin it on anything specific.
It's a 'struggle' - I say that in quotes to make it neutral. Through struggle we learn and that is a good thing. And at times we struggle and get frustrated or just give up...a bad thing.
But being aware of why we do what we do helps us find another way.
As Edison put it...'I did not fail at making a light bulb work, I found all the ways that it does not work.'
Elimination is sometimes part of the process.
One of my teachers says, 'you have to get through all the 'no' answers before you find the 'yes' answer.
'Yes' and 'no' can wear masks. An event, person or comment are the masks...did you like it? ...yes or no?
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