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I know we have veterans (like myself) in the forum and new members, even members who may not remember me. The last 2 years of my life have been utter hell. When living in Spain, on my birthday I got a call from my mum to tell me that my Dad (54 years old, the most healthiest man I have known) was diagnosed with Stage 4 NSCLC. I dropped to my knees I couldn´t believe it. I got the first flight home and spent 6 months living in Scotland helping out emotionally and physically. To cut a long story short my Dad passed away a couple of months ago. I feel like my life is over, just the way I feel at the moment, depression has set in and I am finding it difficult. Anyway I just want to pay a visit and come back to CD. I hope your all doing fine.
Scotslass ... very sorry to hear about your Dad. It is always hard to lose a parent and harder still when they are relatively young.
Unfortunately, dying is part of the cycle of life and there is not much any of us can do about that. As you get older you will find that friends and relatives do pass away. In the last year I have lost my mother, my mother-in-law, my brother-in-law, my 2nd cousin and a neighbour who passed away just last Thursday. My father died when he was just 43 and I was just 9.
I always think it is best to try to celebrate their lives rather than dwell upon the loss. And, I suspect, that is what they would want us to do. Life goes on and I think we need to focus on being the best we can be and something that they would be proud of.
My dad passed away 15 years ago and I miss him every single day.
Life has many challenges, just remember he will live on in your heart, mind and deeds forever. You are a part of him and he you ... make him proud and live and most importantly Love life.
Hi Scotslass - I do remember you. There isn't much that I can say or do besides giving you my condolences. I lost my grandfather in 2010 - multiple organ failure. He was 76. He was very active - he went hunting in Scotland regularly and kept busy in general. It was a shock to everyone - it was so sudden and with no warning - so I can somewhat relate. There are no words.
Jezer is correct, I think - I find it better to celebrate their life, rather than mourn their death. When my grandfather died, some of my cousins created a scrapbook with pictures of him with his children & grandchildren over the years - it was a present to my grandmother. We shared stories and laughter - the things he did and the things he said.
Scotslass - so very sorry to hear this. It's important now that you give yourself time to deal with this however you feel works for you. Everyone has a different way of dealing with such a hard loss.
I went thru similar many, many years ago, my dad was about the same age as your dad. You must know that you are still getting over the shock of his passing and there are stages of grief you must go through before you can start to smile and think of the good times. The 5 Stages of Loss and Grief | Psych Central
those of us who went before you can only tell you to give yourself time. Allow yourself to feel all the feelings - anger, loss, sadness, etc.. Some days will be easier than others. Allow yourself to have bad days and know the good ones are coming. This is all normal and you need to feel these so as to move towards healing. If you have a faith system, lean on your faith. Many of us could not manage without prayers. And, do what you are doing here.,. reach out, share your feelings. People care and want to help.
You will make it, have faith. Know that each trying, sad or bad experience is strengthening you for what life brings. There may be a tough moment in the future when you can look back and tell yourself you can make it - if you made it through losing a parent, you can handle anything
From one lass to another, you'll be alright
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