Non-mormon family looking to relocate to Lehi (Ogden, Layton: employment, transfer)

[blessed mom]

I really love where I live, and I don't want to move. But I can see that there will be some challenges with living here, even being an active LDS family >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Good for you for talking to your son about it!
I had never seen my children act as bigots until we moved here!! I don't want to raise my children this way. That is why we prayerfully decided to move. Outside of Utah and Idaho - LDS are the minority -- therefore this kind of behavior and attitude will really not work. I am very concerned about the "all is well in Zion" attitude I see so often here in Utah.

We want to raise children who are kind and loving and respectful to all people. Regardless of race or creed.

When my son said this about the neighbor mowing his lawn - I about fell over! It's really none of our business what our neighbor chooses to do on Sunday, and how do we know that he is not really a great guy? I really had a talk with my son. I was so dissapointed.

I wish you the best as you continue to live in Utah and try to raise you children as the Lord would have you do.

[DP525]

An update for those following this thread: We have closed on our house in Daybreak and moved in. Our neighbors have been nothing but very friendly. As a matter of fact, we have never lived anywhere where so many neighbors have introduced themselves, brought cookies, etc. We have already met more neighbors than we did in four years at our last house. Our kids are enjoying playing with all of the other kids on the street. And the "question" has not been asked. It doesn't seem to be an issue. At least not yet. I am really getting the feeling that this whole issue has been blown out of proportion by a few people who had negative experiences. I think Coolcats hit the nail on the head when he said the only ones who post here are those who have something to say, and usually it is negative. The people who are quietly enjoying life in Utah would never have a reason to seek out such a forum, much less post to it. And I am quite sure those people are in the majority in Utah. For those who are considering a move due to IMFT, I wouldn't let the LDS "issue" stop you. There are too many good thing about IMFT opportunities and life in Utah too worry about it.

[zoey96]

DP525,

First of all, congratulations on your new home! I'm so happy you got the home you wanted.

Please keep us posted on how the commute goes. My husband started his job at IMF, but I won't be moving to SLC for a few more months. I'm anxious to see how you like the drive, since I've decided Daybreak will be one of the areas we will be looking at when I get there.

Thanks!

[Zuma Mama]

I have never ventured into this kind of forum before ~ ever! But, hey in the spirt of diversity and inclusiveness I'd like to respond.

I grew up in Murray Utah (about 15 miles north of Lehi) and am an active member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. In elementary school I had a couple of friends that were not LDS. NOT ONCE did my parents ever say that I could not play with or associate with nonmember children. As a teenager I dated several boys of other faiths. NOT ONCE did my parents ever say that I could not date anyone but LDS boys. I never had local church teachers tell me not to date anyone who was not LDS.

I did choose to marry someone of my faith. We lived in Seattle Washington while he went to graduate school at the UW. I enjoyed my neighbors there ~ all of them! I found the people colorful and fun. Everyone seemed to have something I could learn from, some kind of goodness to share. I dearly miss the Great Northwest for the scenery and the people of all religions, cultures and backgrounds.

We now live in West Jordan, Utah. An area densely populated with LDS families. However, I am determined to carry on the good example of my parents. My children ARE allowed to play with children of other faiths. My young daugthers very best friend is not LDS and we adore her! I am teaching my children that we like people for who they are on the inside and not for where they go on Sunday.

Now, I've tried to imagine what makes some people think that LDS people form "cliques". I'm just guessing that because our religion has meetings, youth actitives and other gatherings that happen at the church some nonmembers think they are not welcome. In my heart I believe the words that are posted on EVERY LDS church building "Visitors Welcome". I want my actions to reflect what I believe.

I apologize on behalf of those members who may have come across shortsighted and "cold" or closed. I'd venture to guess that sometimes these folks don't even realize what they were doing. They are probably running late to some church meeting. I do not live in a bubble and I admit that there are some very rude LDS people. Just as there are some very rude people of other faiths. It's sad. There was only one perfect man who lived on this earth. The rest of us make mistakes and must try harder each day to be a little nicer.

Finally, in my own neighborhood I have started a fall tradition. For the last four years we have held a "Fall Fesitival for Families". This is a chili dinner plus pot-luck. We put an invitation on every door within a 3 block radius (regardless of denomination). All children are invited into our garden to pick a pumpkin that we then decorate in my next door neighbors driveway. The children play games on the lawn and the grown-ups visit in lawn chairs on the driveway. Our average attendance has been about 60 or so (that is all we can afford ~ we are not tyring to exclude those who live 4 or more blocks away).

I belive that there are many LDS people who feel and act like me. I suspect there are even some in Lehi. I do hope that the neighborhood you move to has individuals who heed the counsel of our prophet and befriend ALL their neighbors.

Best of luck to you and especially to your children!

P.S. I began to read some of the responses and just grew tired of all the arguing and verbal assaults flying back and forth between strangers. I quit reading after a few. I decided my time would be better spent answering the original question and then moving on to finalizing plans for our "Fall Festival For Families".

[DP525]

Zuma Mama,

Thanks for that! I hope you read my last post. It says what I have come to believe about living in Utah. And again I will say, we have already met most of our new immediate neighbors in Daybreak and they have been extremely nice. And if their friendliness is not sincere, they do a good job of faking it! Now I suppose many of them are LDS (visual clues?), but I don't know for sure. They didn't introduce themselves as, "Hi. I'm Bob Smith and I am LDS." My family might be mistaken as Mormon (minivan filled with three blonde kids) and that is why they are being nice. But I honestly don't think so. I think they are just nice folks. Whatever religion they might or might not be. Now there are some who have not introduced themselves. But we had those at our last house too. There were people there we never talked to after four years, and not for a lack of trying. Some people are just like that. I won't hold it against them and I won't assume they are dodging the new non-LDS neighbors. And Zuma, I like you think there are just a few bad apples.

I think what you are doing with your October party is great. We should all be so lucky as to have someone who brings all the neighbors together. Kind of rare these days...

[Zuma Mama]

To DP525,

After I submitted my response I did go back through more of the postings. I got caught up on your arrival at Daybreak ~ welcome!

I learned quite a bit by carefully reading and considering others feelings and opinions ~ funny how that works! You have really started something and I'm glad to admit I have learned something tonight!

I say "how ironic" because I have never entered a forum like this (no time ~ too busy enjoying life). The whole reason I found this sight was because I was looking for some kind of community board or newsletter with events in Daybreak!

My dear, and aging, inlaws just bought a very small home there (not built yet) and will be moving down here from Spokane Washington next year!! They were here visiting us this week and they just "happened" to drive into the community and found it very delightful. They had been looking to relocate here so they could be close to their grandchildren (and so that my hubby and I could look after them if/when their health declines).

Just this past Thursday they bought their lot and this morning they drove back to Spokane. My children begged me all day to take them back to Daybreak to see "Grandma's dirt" (the little lot where they will build their tiny retiree's nest). My children loved playing by the lake. I took them back to the park in the "model home village" and there I met a very nice lady who had moved from Las Vegas. She raved about the community and all it's great features.

Strange how I ended up in this "thread" (or whatever) just after returning from an evening in your new neighborhood?!!

P.S. Thanks for creating such a learning experience for me! Before my daughter went to bed tonight I had a discussion with her about this topic. She is in the 5th grade and I am happy to report that she has a very healthy outlook on this whole issue.

[DP525]

Zuma,

I am just sorry there ever needed to be a thread. We are all Americans first, LDS, Catholics, or whatever second. This country was born on the premise of religious freedom if I remember right. It is too bad some of us might have lost that concept. And the Mormons have certainly had their share of the bad end of that deal.

Anyway, we love it in Daybreak. And after much anxiety, we now call ourselves what you call yourself--Utahans!!

[Elder_Shawn]

DP525,

I'm sooo glad you are finally here and have enjoyed your neighbors. We had dinner tonight with one of my non-LDS co workers that just moved into Daybreak. They kinda feel like outcasts not because of their religion, but due to their lack of children. They said the elementary is already full due to all the kids!

[DP525]

Originally Posted by Elder_Shawn

DP525,

I'm sooo glad you are finally here and have enjoyed your neighbors. We had dinner tonight with one of my non-LDS co workers that just moved into Daybreak. They kinda feel like outcasts not because of their religion, but due to their lack of children. They said the elementary is already full due to all the kids!

Yes, I get the feeling being child-less would put you in the minority. When I met my neighbors, it was always the same introduction. "Hi, I'm So and So, how many children do you have?" So I feel like I am part of the "In" crowd because I have three kids. How funny.

[coolcats]

Originally Posted by DP525

Yes, I get the feeling being child-less would put you in the minority. When I met my neighbors, it was always the same introduction. "Hi, I'm So and So, how many children do you have?" So I feel like I am part of the "In" crowd because I have three kids. How funny.

Hey DP -- how do your kids like their schools? Have they had any of the isolation or adjustment problems others have reported? What do you think of the school situation (both from a diversity standpoint and from a quality standpoint)? I'm just curious.