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Hrm, I echo none of 54321's view. Again I think it's important to differentiate between big cities and smaller southern cities and small towns. I've never encountered any of the maltreatment that 54321 has, and I was born in New Haven, CT and raised in Vermont. But I live south of Roanoke, VA, not Chesapeake.
I've NEVER been asked what church I go to. Church is a big part of people's lives down here but so is being cordial. I wonder if this is more of an issue where there are more Catholics in the population and there exists more of a boundary line between the social circles of Catholics and Evangelicals? Makes me wonder. Down here, it's mostly baptist, with a dash of catholic. Anyway, I'm a fiscally conservative socially progressive athiest, and most of my friends down here are southern baptists and methodists We suffer eachother gladly.
whats interesting is the people moving down from the North dont see the the contradiction. In the North people will rudely ask about where one goes or went to University adn how did you pay for it. where I come from, SC, TX, MS, the first part is not often asked and the second is just down right bad manners.
As an african american man born and raised in the South, but educated in teh North, at Ivy League Brown Univerity, I get asked all the time by white northerners "Did you go to Brown on scholarship or take out a heep of loans"?
It is one of the most offensive comments I get, as I have never had to take out a loan, my parents paid my school bills, and I am not poor. But to them if you are black and southern going to a upper crust University you must be one of those scholarship students from a cotton picking Delta town. Not hardly, most of the time i meet white northerners, they are 85% of the time, the first generation college student, while my family has been graduating from college since the 1850s.
Northerners think that because they have new york and they have some liberal issues to brag about in voting, that they are superior to others but they dont like it when the tables are turned. Condescending attitudes from Northerners moving down South makes Southerners react.
so, think before judging someone. If they ask you what church you go to, think think think about the NEW Culture you are in and accept it as part of life, as Southerners have to moving up north.
I'm a Georgia Peach and know that ANY woman, N, S, E, or W, can be a real "B" if she wants to. I try not to stereotype any one, but what's with the Northerners thinking we're all "HICKS"? Just because we speak with a long drawl, doesn't mean we all live in the sticks, chew tobacco, and have barn animals running everywhere! I try to give everyone a fair chance, but I'm tired of hearing about Southerners being hicks from the Northerners!...Now I'm being mean! Sorry
teamcambron - I was born and raised in California and have lived there my whole life - some of the most interesting, educated and funny - really funny - women I have ever met are from the south. I think there are many people that have never been to the south or known a variety of southern women who just assume the are hicks - why, I'm not sure - a very old stereotype I guess.
I Haven't been the subject of maltreatment. We are talking about our experiences and interactions with people. I find ALL or Never or ALWAYS statements offensive and bigoted. I have not classified 'southern people' in any manner, there are thousands that I haven't met yet! I did share my experiences with those I have encountered though and how they made me feel.
I guess the next 'discussion' will be someone telling me that my feelings are wrong. Fortunately I know better. Reread this thread and count how many people just KNOW how ALL New Englanders, esp NYers are rude. How can people honestly make statements like this?
Just my opinion, please don't jump all over me. I have met very friendly people here in Chesapeake, many have been friends for 10 yrs. I am a good friend to many also. Reading the racist statements are offensive. I understand that I may be wrong, I believe it enough to raise my daughter to be tolerant of others differences. To get to know people and not judge them by how they look or where they are from. At 21 she is a kind and compassionate young woman.
I find ALL or Never or ALWAYS statements offensive and bigoted.
I simply said that I didn't share your experience and offered some of my own particular experiences along with a general curiousity regarding what might cause some of the behavior you describe. And all at once you've implied that a statement of mine is offensive and bigoted. Oh, the irony!
Originally Posted by 54321
I find that the premise of southern hospitality is a crock. They'll ask how you are, but don't care either. You can see it in body language. I am not categorixing all Virginians as this way, they aren't. My best friend here is a southern belle from Charleston, SC.
Where I come from this is called Talking Out of the Side of Your Mouth. In the same breath you make rash and negative generalizations about an entire community of people and then you claim not to be generalizing, and provide a "token" southerner that you've befriended. You can't have it both ways. And if that's not your intent then you should re-examine your style of communication.
I suspect it's not so much a North vs South issue in 54321's case. I suspect he/she has a Type A personality and that, like most Type A folks, about 3/8ths of those in the same life and career circles have a highly favorable opinion of them; another 1/8th have no opinion; and fully 3/8ths have a highly negative opinion.
This whole North vs South thread is such a typical reflection of the human condition. When in a "strange land", I wonder how many hundreds of random acts of kindness we bear witness to and forget about. But when some idiot comes along and acts unkindly it overshadows so much of the kindness extended to us on a daily basis.
I don't hate the North, East or West, or the people that live there. My stepgrandfather was from Rhode Island when he married my grandmother 42 years ago. Even more so, he was Italian and his mother spoke no English when they moved down here to Georgia. All I want is for the orginial person that stated southerners(esp. southern women) are all mean to rethink what he said. Just remember...you reap what you sow...do unto others...what goes around, comes around. In the South, you are usually treated accordingly. If you act like a jerk or a fool, you get treated like one. I hate to say it..but it's true!
Corretta Scott King
Kaye Bailey Hutchinson
Lady Bird Johnson
None of these ladies are considered to be Hicks, funny how the Northerners look through such small lenses to find negativity.
Atlanta, charlotte, Dallas, Houston, Miami, Savannah, Raliegh, Richmond, Jackson, Nashville and Charleston have some of the finest smartest and wittiest women ever created By God almighty, and quite sophisticated as well,
carolinajack, I am very confused. where is the post that "the northerners look through such small lenses to find negativity?"
your second comment on the 'finest, smartest and wittiest women ever created by God almighty, and quite sophisticated as well..... have you met all th women from these places? I am not from them, many of your adjectives describe me and many other si know who also aren't from those areas.
This isnt an argument or to goad, I am trying to understand.
Good day for you!
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