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Personally, I've ended online dating. I now 'scour' the metros - making small talk with females either in the train or waiting for the train. Hell, many a times, I've passed my train stop just to keep the convo flowing - statistically, this has had a much better affect than online dating. Of course, if you don't have the balls to do this - well, it's not for you then.
Well buddy, I will be looking for a period of instruction on how to do this. I end up having to stand because the trains being so packed. I thought about making some moves but you are right, you have to have some balls to this especially when the other people know exactly why you left your location to go spark up a conversation.
My point is would you have even gone out on a date with either of these women if they did not have jobs making over 100k, a title, and great education? I understand that people need someone on the same intellectual level as well as having common core values but lets just be honest with ourselves. Men, especially DC men, are looking for someone with money and status that is also young and very attractive and thin. DC men don't have to bring much to the table.
It is very interesting that you mention this. Clearly it is a case of like vs like and is most certainly reasonable. But at the same time, it doesn't work for many because it comes down to proportionality.
If a person is making well into $150-$250, this person clearly isn't working as a store clerk in CVS. I am not talking about wage jobs that you need to work double overtime. I mean making $200 grand just showing up to work. This means this person has undergone some intense training, has a wealth of on the job knowledge/training and most likely is managing a few employees. Their mentality on a day to day basis isn't that of an average $20 per hour employee. And this is not to put anyone down but the ones that are a bit more aloof and stiff, or if busy is what you want to call it, normally have a good sense of fit based on all their training. It doesn't mean that the person pursuing isn't a good catch but it is often not a good catch for that person. They need a person that can stimulate them according to their SPECIFIC needs. And these needs can be a bit more specific than the average joe or jane that doesn't have an intense way of life. Being an attorney or nurse making so much isn't going to checkout at 5pm and slip into their pajamies and eat ice cream all night until the next working day. They tend to always be "on it" and rarely shut it off.
I personally don't date women that are in such positions. I don't like people that can't turn it off. My father divorced my step-mother because as an OBGYN with her own clinic, she just couldn't turn it off. All she knew was the children and did a great job maintaining the home. But as for relating to my father and his business goals, she just wasn't there mentality to stimulate my father as a partner.
And this is why relationships and marriages don't last long! Are you seriously expecting to meet a 30 plus year old woman who makes over 150k a year, is beautiful, sex crazed, and will also be a housewife, cook, and mom? Umm maybe the sexy $10 an hour nanny will be the mom, and you will have a cook, but then again if she's making that much she is obviously more dedicated to her career and is more man like and independent that she needs nobody! Why are you saying people on here have their standards too high when you are looking for women who "are in the same income bracket as me" ? Kind of classifies you as money hungry and a gold digger and obviously not seeking real love.
You obviously didn't read what I said and you're making assumptions. Did I go out with 2 women last week in my income bracket? Yes. Was it an attractive quality at the time? Yes. However, I never mentioned anywhere this is what I want or go for typically. I just happened to go out with 2 women in my income bracket. Also, I never mentioned beautiful (they aren't) or sex crazed and never made mention of a housewife. Try reading a post before posting a nasty rant. I don't need to be money hungry or a gold digger since I do quite well on my own. I never said I was looking for someone in the same income bracket as me but the idea did appeal to me last week. In all honesty, a high income doesn't translate into wealth. Wealth takes time to build and I'm not overly impressed with high salaries if someone is living beyond their means. It means they're broke. I live below mine and invest.
I've dated plenty of women who make over $150k in DC. My experience tells me that women who make more than their peers are also far more apprehensive when dating. I had a chat about this with a very good female friend who is also a corp attorney in DC - she makes over $250k a year and is single (so are a lot of her female lawyer colleagues). She admitted that a lot of high salary females feel the need to 'protect' what they have - their money being the main thing, but also their stature, position, etc. I asked if this is because it may be more difficult for women to attain a higher salaried position than men of equal education and she said yes, but also because the norm for men is to be the breadwinner and share what they have with the family - this is something that men are expected to do, I don't think women on the whole have much 'sharing of their income' experience.
So it seems to be a double edged sword for women who make high salaries - and more than men. Taking this into consideration, I think the complex layer of online dating gives more pause to a woman in this situation, I certainly can't see how it helps at least.
Personally, I've ended online dating. I now 'scour' the metros - making small talk with females either in the train or waiting for the train. Hell, many a times, I've passed my train stop just to keep the convo flowing - statistically, this has had a much better affect than online dating. Of course, if you don't have the balls to do this - well, it's not for you then.
In all reality, I think a lot of women making high salaries want to hold off on marriage or not get married at all. Our demographics in this country (and worldwide) are changing and the American Dream is no longer marriage, kids, and a white picket fence like it was years ago. First off, I have dated attorneys and choose not to anymore. I just don't have anything in common with them since they are always on, work long hours, generally have a more serious demeanor than me, etc. I could really care less about salary, its more about connection for me. I will admit that dating and possibly marrying someone in my income bracket would allow us to buy a big house, travel frequently, etc. but I could also find someone who is a super spender even with a high salary and be broke. I'm big on wealth building having no debt and I run the risk of meeting someone who is financially irresponsible, even with a high salary.
I've met some great women on Match so I continue to do so. I can't say I run into many women I'm attracted to on the Metro, or women in general, for that matter. I leave my office at 4:30 and take the red line to Chinatown and then the green line to Navy Yard. I've met women the old fashioned way out and about and also online and the ones I have met in person have their issues as well. I just screen better online and it seems like everyone is doing it nowadays. Not being a fan of the bar scene it allows me to date a couple of times a week which is a nice social life when you mix in going out with friends an additional 2 nights a week. The online portals are definitely full of flakes, fakes, and game players but I've also met some very attractive and successful women that I wouldn't run across in person.
I didn't think the average fine-looking female likes talking to a stranger on a train. For the most part, it seems like it creeps them out for some reason, so they just keep their mouths shut.
I didn't think the average fine-looking female likes talking to a stranger on a train. For the most part, it seems like it creeps them out for some reason, so they just keep their mouths shut.
Agreed! I've become a fan of Match strictly because I screen pretty well (minus the two nightmares from last week) and because the happy hour scene sucks. I've met so many d**chebags out at bars here in DC its not even funny. I'll just stick to the online medium where most people are actually trying to meet someone else and leave the bar scene and metro to others. Different strokes for different folks.
Alright, let’s cut this off at the knees. I’m going to go deep here so stick with me. I will also point out a few things that may not make sense to people at first but in time, you will begin to completely understand.
#1- There is a total disconnect within the subconscious of many of these women here in DC. The disconnect lies in the fact that they undermine the very texture that they are promoting themselves. To further explain, women go on to reference “men are so status /money oriented and it seems as if one doesn’t have a great job with power and status then forget about finding anyone decent”. But yet, these same women are prancing around wearing their “smartness” and master’s degree on their sleeves. So if a woman plans on moving to Kansas City Mo, is she going to immediately reveal how “smart” she is in her first post? You can think about that. Having the texture of DC already embedded in their minds, they break out the smart dress hoping to get the red carpet service but they have nothing else to offer.
#2- Book/College “smart” doesn’t equate to social aptitude or the ability to read, learn and adapt to the texture of a city. Each city has its own texture and women nor men can’t expect to run game the same way in a new city as they did in their last. Social aptitude would teach them that, not some AP Political Science course.
#3- If smart, FED job, master’s degree and good salary is all they can offer or put on to paper to make themselves more marketable, they clearly have no idea what men really want. The men already have the status and power so why do they need another power hungry chic barking orders in the bedroom?
#4- DC women should stop wearing “smart” on their sleeves and start talking about how they can actually cultivate a relationship as a WOMAN, NOT A CO-WORKER.
What do you have against smart women in Kansas City ��
You obviously didn't read what I said and you're making assumptions. Did I go out with 2 women last week in my income bracket? Yes. Was it an attractive quality at the time? Yes. However, I never mentioned anywhere this is what I want or go for typically. I just happened to go out with 2 women in my income bracket. Also, I never mentioned beautiful (they aren't) or sex crazed and never made mention of a housewife. Try reading a post before posting a nasty rant. I don't need to be money hungry or a gold digger since I do quite well on my own. I never said I was looking for someone in the same income bracket as me but the idea did appeal to me last week. In all honesty, a high income doesn't translate into wealth. Wealth takes time to build and I'm not overly impressed with high salaries if someone is living beyond their means. It means they're broke. I live below mine and invest.
I DID read what you wrote and you said what i quoted and you bragged about the "Anesthetist" who made around 200k in this area and "she couldn't keep her hands off of me" and "brought up sexual things she wanted to do with me" Need I go on?
Quote:
DC is a melting pot. I've dated the whole spectrum. Just this week I went out with a CRNA (Certified Registered Nurse Anesthetist) who generally make around 200k in the area and she went to Columbia. On paper she sounds great and during the date she complimented me, couldn't keep her hands off of me, and said she wanted to go on another date with me. She even brought up sexual things she wanted to do with me. Second date set for tonight and she said yesterday the hospital was shortstaffed so she was on call. She said after Saturday afternoon she was free so I mention Saturday night and she says she would be too tired after the half marathon. I shot a text back offering Sunday and get no response. This doesn't make any sense from the kind of date we had the other night other than the fact she is a tease and likes attention.
Another woman I dated making over 150k (I say this because they are both in the same income bracket as me) and upon meeting her she reached out her hand for a handshake instead of a hug (which I gave her anyway). After a while I went in for a kiss and got shot down big time which was completely embarrassing.This woman was the typical boring DC area woman with a good job but not very feminine.
I can't say I would generalize women in the area from these two bad instances. Yes these women sucked (in my opinion) but I have also met some really nice women in the area as well. It seems the people complaining on here are negative people in general since the same people have nothing positive to say. Perhaps your standards are too high or you're just a negative person. Either way the problem is you.
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I end up having to stand because the trains being so packed. I thought about making some moves but you are right, you have to have some balls to this especially when the other people know exactly why you left your location to go spark up a conversation.
