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Two hours each way from Havre de Grace?! Yikes. You deserve a medal for putting up with it even as long as you have.
Have you checked out Columbia? It would cut your commute in half, is roughly equidistant to DC and Baltimore, very safe, and somewhat affordable for the area and townhomes can be had within your price range. If you want to move even closer, Laurel has many similarly-priced townhomes and is about 10-15 minutes closer in although some of it is hit and miss in terms of safety. Believe it or not, but 400K is generally a doable price for much of the DC area for a townhouse. It might not buy much in the most exclusive areas like DC proper, Bethesda and McLean, but throughout much of the rest of the area, that can buy you a pretty standard townhome (2-3 bedrooms, 1.5-2.5 bathrooms, some with a garage). You can check out the areas around Metro's Red Line in Montgomery County as well, for a more city-like atmosphere and easy access to DC, although townhomes right by Metro stations tend to be a bit on the pricy side.
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