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Old 10-08-2019, 04:15 PM
 
Location: Part time dual resident of 76131 and 46060
2,996 posts, read 2,032,078 times
Reputation: 1006

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sun Belt-lover L.A.M. View Post
Last winter was unusually mild, and I can comfortably wear summer clothing down to about 55F (TN average sweater weather limit is 60F, but people here seem to wear up to 65F). However, I still hung on by a thread even when switching to long sleeves and gloves, and I often felt cold outside/house-confined if the high was even just 45F. Here are my known obstacles to dealing with winter blues:
Spoiler
--Most of the native forests and trees/shrubs my parents planted are deciduous, so looking out the windows does nothing to help this bleak outlook on winter.
--Winters here are sunny slightly less than half the time, and the midday UV index in December and most of January is 2 even when it is sunny. Many places' winters don't surpass 1 or even 0 and are cloudier, but that just makes me wonder how they even get by at all.
--I try very hard to see my friends no matter the season, but most of them are always busy. The few that aren't haven't met me in person, except one who has an irritating little sister and another who often bails on me out of laziness.
--My hopes of finding a boyfriend before I turn 17 are now quashed, so I have no love to focus on instead.
--Wearing a jacket or extra shirt makes me feel even less comfortable than being cold and just adds to the winter blues. Plus, it reminds me of the old days I was being bullied and unfairly punished in middle school as well as the days I was still closeted, which are not good memories to have around.
--Listening to music full of good memories in winter often counteracts the initial effect, and doing that with bad-memory-filled music in summer doesn't counteract the initial effect.
--Winter highs here average in the mid to upper 40s in January, but it's bound to be lower 40s or below several days in a row at some point. I don't know if I had a tougher time with sleeves/gloves because last winter was so humid (it rained almost 10in in January) or if I'm just not built for the cold.
--I know exercising generates more heat, but I can't do it for long. Running gets me worn out in less than a minute, and I ultimately lose all the heat I regained before resting enough to run again.
--In summer, I can adjust to the heat by drinking cold water, closing my door and vent with my PC running to trap my room's heat and taking hot showers. However, taking cold or even cool showers is unbearable for me, feeling hot gives me trouble sleeping, and my parents refuse to use less firewood in winter despite the knowledge of my struggle, the carbon footprint burning wood leaves and our brown recluse problem coming from the firewood's entry. I know I could technically just sleep outside, but that'd expose me to hypothermia (our average lows are in the mid to upper 20s, and I'm a sweaty sleeper) and wildlife.
--Doing things with family, even supportive family, is rarely an option. Mom is often bed-ridden due to her thyroid disease; her mom is usually housebound taking care of my elderly great-grandfather; my cousins (at least those besides my estranged maternal cousins) are no less busy than my friends; and the rest of my family, including dad, has little to nothing in common with me.

I hate to admit it, but I think I have low expectations/self-esteem and am seasonally depressed. Any advice on how to acclimate?
Just be glad that you donít live in a cesspool continental climate ffs
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Old 10-08-2019, 05:42 PM
Status: "Closed minds and open mouths are the worst combination." (set 2 days ago)
 
Location: Putnam County, TN
256 posts, read 55,473 times
Reputation: 143
Quote:
Originally Posted by Peregrine View Post
In... Tennessee?!?! You don't know winter depression at all. I'd trade my winter for yours.
I do. I'm a more sensitive person overall. I'm sure I couldn't take anything colder/longer/gloomier, even if hardly so.

Quote:
And what do you mean"whatever happens politically?"
You'd base a move... on politics?
Yes. If I were merely a liberal, I could live with it, but being an autistic LGBT person in Tennessee under the Trump administration is far from comforting. If he were re-elected, or (even worse) if Pence became president, I'd feel seriously unsafe compared to a place like Nevada, Virginia or even Arizona.

Anyways, back to topic, not here to start a debate. I was only answering someone's questions.
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Old 10-08-2019, 06:01 PM
 
Location: Knoxville, TN
1,852 posts, read 740,813 times
Reputation: 2324
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sun Belt-lover L.A.M. View Post

Yes. If I were merely a liberal, I could live with it, but being an autistic LGBT person in Tennessee under the Trump administration is far from comforting. If he were re-elected, or (even worse) if Pence became president, I'd feel seriously unsafe compared to a place like Nevada, Virginia or even Arizona.

Anyways, back to topic, not here to start a debate. I was only answering someone's questions.
You don't need to worry yourself thinking that way, that's not how it is, assuming you are in a metropolitan area. Gay, married, would not live anywhere else in the world other than West Knoxville.

Where are you coming from to where winter is so bad here?

I used to hate winter, with a capital H, but now I love it that I'm a little older and settled down. And since I bought a house. I don't have to do a lick of yard work.
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Old 10-08-2019, 07:22 PM
Status: "Closed minds and open mouths are the worst combination." (set 2 days ago)
 
Location: Putnam County, TN
256 posts, read 55,473 times
Reputation: 143
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mister 7 View Post
You don't need to worry yourself thinking that way, that's not how it is, assuming you are in a metropolitan area. Gay, married, would not live anywhere else in the world other than West Knoxville.
I'm not in a major city. Sure, I do live half an hour from a medium city, and I'm just an hour (close enough to date/befriend) from Nashville and Murfreesboro, but that's not enough. I'd rather be in Davidson County or no more than 20 minutes from Murfreesboro, and I'm planning to get a decent plot of land in Rutherford or rural Davidson County for my shop, plant farm and adulthood house instead of remaining in Putnam County. I don't think I'll ever forget how homophobic many of dad's coworkers and how mean/unfair the people I was around in school are/were.

Even making decent friends has been very troublesome. Finding a boyfriend and seeing those friends still very much are, and that does nothing to help at any time of year; I'm just most vulnerable in December and January.
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Old 10-09-2019, 06:44 AM
 
Location: Northern Virginia
1,093 posts, read 389,457 times
Reputation: 2596
Your problem isn't winter in Tennessee, your problem appears to be your life in Tennessee. I don't think this is really a thread for the weather forum to be honest.
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Old 10-09-2019, 10:22 AM
 
Location: Loudon, TN
6,212 posts, read 5,115,318 times
Reputation: 21352
I agree, I don't think this is a weather based issue. Yes, it can be grey/brown in winter here, but you sound depressed right now, and it's not even winter yet. If I were you I would focus on school and what friends you have. Make plans to move closer to an urban area where you will find more LGBT friendly folks, activities, and venues as early as you can. Don't get all hung up on finding "love" by a certain age. The person you think you love at 17 will probably not be the person in your life that will be there long term. Are you planning to go to college? If so, I would focus on getting ready for college and perhaps working in your current area to get some money for college and as a way to meet more friends. Colleges have clubs and much more activities that are LGBT friendly. If you are busy with work and school, you will have less time to focus on your depression. Have you spoken to your doctor regarding your depression? They have special lights for SAD, and if you have year round depression, perhaps an antidepressant is in order. When you get out of your rural area and get to a locale with more LGBT folks you can talk to, I think you will feel a lot better. In the meantime, invest in some lightweight under layers, and buy a really awesome jacket and some nice sweaters as well as gloves. The "slouchy beanie" look is in now, so definitely get one, and wear in cold weather, or anytime you want really.

edited to add: You sound very interested in botanical subjects. Perhaps you could check out if there is a Master Gardener program in your area and start taking classes towards your Master Gardener certificate. Being busy is the best antidote for loneliness/depression in my opinion. You have less time to dwell on the negatives.

Last edited by TheShadow; 10-09-2019 at 10:36 AM..
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Old 10-09-2019, 04:38 PM
Status: "Closed minds and open mouths are the worst combination." (set 2 days ago)
 
Location: Putnam County, TN
256 posts, read 55,473 times
Reputation: 143
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheShadow View Post
I don't think this is a weather based issue.
I meant for it to be. It does at least peak in very early November to Groundhog Day (solar winter). However, a mod is welcome to move it to the appropriate section if necessary.

Quote:
...you sound depressed right now, and it's not even winter yet.
True, but the foliage started changing earlier than normal due to a bad drought. I also had a really rough September due to something that happened then, and mid-term improvements are impossible for me after early August. Plus, October does have less daylight than the Equinox months (March and September) and is on a downward trend (as opposed to February).

Quote:
If I were you I would focus on school and what friends you have.
I do try to, but school only occupies part of my day, week and year. Plus, what friends I have are often busy, save for one who's often lazy, another who's poor and also depressed (I'd rather not bother him) and a third with an annoying five-year-old sister.

Quote:
Make plans to move closer to an urban area where you will find more LGBT friendly folks, activities, and venues as early as you can.
I already plan to do so. Thank you! I already plan to move to Nashville or Murfreesboro unless I leave the state entirely.

Quote:
Don't get all hung up on finding "love" by a certain age.
I don't feel that way because I care about not being "behind" nor just because I want to fit in. I genuinely crave the romantic aspect.

Quote:
Are you planning to go to college? If so, I would focus on getting ready for college and perhaps working in your current area to get some money for college and as a way to meet more friends. Colleges have clubs and much more activities that are LGBT friendly.
I'm not planning on college. It'd be too much for me to manage, and I pretty much already have my career path planned out.

Quote:
They have special lights for SAD
I've asked my mom about getting a UV lamp before November, and she did agree to it. Thanks to any of you who suggested that!

Quote:
...and if you have year round depression, perhaps an antidepressant is in order.
I already take antidepressants. 20mg every morning and 60mg every evening prescribed by my doctor. However, I haven't talked to my doctor about WHAT I'm feeling because I'm very cowardly, and I know Tennessee is the one state where therapists can legally reject someone for being LGBT.
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Old 10-09-2019, 04:44 PM
 
Location: Knoxville, TN
1,852 posts, read 740,813 times
Reputation: 2324
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sun Belt-lover L.A.M. View Post
I already take antidepressants. 20mg every morning and 60mg every evening prescribed by my doctor. However, I haven't talked to my doctor about WHAT I'm feeling because I'm very cowardly, and I know Tennessee is the one state where therapists can legally reject someone for being LGBT.
That won't happen, even in Cookeville. Find a therapist if you need one.
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Old 10-09-2019, 06:29 PM
 
12,121 posts, read 20,723,935 times
Reputation: 19869
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sun Belt-lover L.A.M. View Post
To directly quote one of the obstacles I mentioned: "--Wearing a jacket or extra shirt makes me feel even less comfortable than being cold and just adds to the winter blues. Plus, it reminds me of the old days I was being bullied and unfairly punished in middle school as well as the days I was still closeted, which are not good memories to have around." Plus, I never forget how cold my hands would get if I did only that, and indeed I've heard that protecting extremities is more effective to start.
Check out silk knit undershirts. I think Landís End carries them. They are light and feel beautiful and silk is great for warmth. Might not feel like restrictive layer because of silkís slip.

https://www.landsend.com/products/me...59?sku_0=::BLA
__________________
Solly says ó Be nice!
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Old 10-10-2019, 09:12 AM
 
Location: Austin, TX
11,042 posts, read 9,752,549 times
Reputation: 6386
I wouldn't be able to bear TN's winter climate either. Even though it's technically in the sunbelt it's too cold.

I would say that only the states hugging the Gulf coast + GA + SC + Desert SW + CA would be states I would consider ever moving to, climate-wise.

The furthest north I could live would be Redding, CA.
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