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Old 05-08-2012, 01:39 AM
 
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no, I'm not getting married, likely ever ..but I was wondering what are your opinions of going cheap on a wedding that isn't "shotgun". I've been seeing/hearing about people skimping on making their wedding really nice, just so they can be married already so was wondering what others think.
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Old 05-08-2012, 02:05 AM
 
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i blame women for making weddings expensive. men don't give a crap about all the stupid pointless details. omg my 8,000$ dress that i'll wear once, and every table decoration has to match with my gown blah blah. weddings are stupid circus shows
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Old 05-08-2012, 02:18 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mir86 View Post
no, I'm not getting married, likely ever .
Never say never, darling.
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Old 05-08-2012, 02:28 AM
 
Location: Chicago
36,588 posts, read 57,867,463 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mir86 View Post
no, I'm not getting married, likely ever ..but I was wondering what are your opinions of going cheap on a wedding that isn't "shotgun". I've been seeing/hearing about people skimping on making their wedding really nice, just so they can be married already so was wondering what others think.
I've done it both ways. First time was the big elaborate affair with hundreds of guests and a fancy reception hall and all of that. Gigantic headache for months on end getting it all put together and stroking various egos and all that just for a ceremony and reception that lasted a few hours. Second time around it was in front of a JP with one witness. Both created friction (families from each side were at each other's throats the first time, various family factions were upset they weren't invited the second time) but at least with the second one the friction didn't spill over into the affair itself. Never mind the cost savings -- it was well the peace of mind knowing that all we had to do was say "OK, let's tie the knot" and it was done a few days later. No meeting with the cake lady, the flower lady, the dress lady, the wedding singer, reception hall owners, no egos to massage, no warring factions, no room full of who knows how many people I'll never see again and perhaps didn't even know or care about in the first place...

Maybe it's easier for someone who already had the big fancy wedding the first time to say "I sure don't need that mess" the second time around... but if I had to do it over again, I would have accepted my then-future and now ex-father-in-law's offer of 5 grand to elope the first time and done everything to persuade my then-fiancee to go along with it.
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Old 05-08-2012, 03:18 AM
 
Location: Up in the air
19,127 posts, read 15,138,895 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by expect View Post
i blame women for making weddings expensive. men don't give a crap about all the stupid pointless details. omg my 8,000$ dress that i'll wear once, and every table decoration has to match with my gown blah blah. weddings are stupid circus shows
Actually... I don't blame women, I blame the families of both parties. My best friends husband wanted a HUGE, extremely expensive wedding and she wanted to elope, so it's not always the women who demand these things.

From the few weddings I've been a part of, it's usually the families that want a big get together so they can somehow one-up friends and family. Personally, I think it's silly and I don't plan on having a wedding if I ever do get married.
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Old 05-08-2012, 06:11 AM
 
Location: Heart of Dixie
1,298 posts, read 1,085,082 times
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Recently married(April 21) We concentrated more on the actual ceremony, it's what meant something to else...all said, personally we spent 1000.00. (dress, his suit, shoes...) everything else was a gift from family or friends...

and I might add, that everyone in attendance was family and very close friends. No formal invitations were sent, and I've been told people have said it was the most romanticwedding they've ever been too...I chose not to be traditional with music, I didn't not come down the aisle to the Wedding March, but too "may I have this dance", by Ann Murray...

I agree all the hoopla is wrong, and if people, in my opinion, would spend as much time on their relationship as they do/did their weddings....well, divorce in America may be a tad less.
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Old 05-08-2012, 07:04 AM
 
Location: NC
4,677 posts, read 2,812,537 times
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My sister wasted $60,000 on a wedding... bought a 1mil house, did the big ring, and is now foreclosed and broke....

I would much rather spend sensibly and not worry about "image".
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Old 05-08-2012, 07:10 AM
 
19,390 posts, read 11,563,828 times
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No big deal on the weddings here small ceremony at the courthouse the first time, small ceremony with a modest dress and friends and family at the church the second time with the reception at a local restaurant the third time we went to Gatlinburg, TN to the Little Log Wedding Chapel another couple went with us. We got married, had supper at a local steak house then went back to the hotel and watched baseball playoffs then told everyone about 3 1/2 years later we got married.
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Old 05-08-2012, 07:25 AM
 
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,691 posts, read 19,680,978 times
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To me, anything above $10,000 is getting into ridiculous territory. A few grand is okay, but if she really doesn't mind, a Vegas or courthouse wedding is enough for me. It'd be way cooler to take a year off and splurge on a round the world trip afterwards!

I don't care much for ceremony. I don't even want a funeral. Believe it or not, I've never actually been to a wedding! Every time I've been invited I've been unable to attend. Don't feel I'm missing much.
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Old 05-08-2012, 07:27 AM
 
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Elope. Keep families out of it! Problem solved.
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