Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships > Weddings
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 06-07-2012, 10:09 AM
 
Location: Tower Grove East, St. Louis, MO
12,063 posts, read 31,551,540 times
Reputation: 3799

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jdawg8181 View Post
Music and etiquette are 2 different things... this that you quoted was about having music playing from an ipod... no one does that here... thats why average weddings cost $60k. It's just not that common here, that's all- we do it big.

In regards to alcohol and food, I would never ask or expect anyone to have to pay for that at my wedding. It is not right to expect others to pay for it b/c you can't.
Yes, but you don't see how judgmental you're coming across? I haven't been to a wedding with an iPod either, but that's not the point. I've been to some hella expensive weddings where there was a tip jar out for the bartender. The amount you spend doesn't necessarily correspond with the amount of class shown at the affair.


If the B&G do the basics I've written out below, then there's nothing to judge in my book. My dear friend had canned beer and boxed wine and gave us all koozies as our favor. It was a budget friendly wedding that still properly hosted the guests. That is the only important thing if you're going to invite others to your wedding.
  • Invite guests with a proper invitation for the formality within the appropriate timeline
  • Provide seats for them at both the ceremony and reception
  • Don't expect them to pay for anything or to solicit money from them in any way
  • Verbally thank them each individually for coming.
  • Send them a thank you note if they give you a gify
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 06-08-2012, 06:08 PM
 
12,769 posts, read 18,325,203 times
Reputation: 8768
Quote:
Originally Posted by aragx6 View Post
Yes, but you don't see how judgmental you're coming across? I haven't been to a wedding with an iPod either, but that's not the point. I've been to some hella expensive weddings where there was a tip jar out for the bartender. The amount you spend doesn't necessarily correspond with the amount of class shown at the affair.



If the B&G do the basics I've written out below, then there's nothing to judge in my book. My dear friend had canned beer and boxed wine and gave us all koozies as our favor. It was a budget friendly wedding that still properly hosted the guests. That is the only important thing if you're going to invite others to your wedding.
  • Invite guests with a proper invitation for the formality within the appropriate timeline
  • Provide seats for them at both the ceremony and reception
  • Don't expect them to pay for anything or to solicit money from them in any way
  • Verbally thank them each individually for coming.
  • Send them a thank you note if they give you a gify
and provide food and booze- essential.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-08-2012, 06:38 PM
 
Location: Brooklyn, New York
1,192 posts, read 1,807,936 times
Reputation: 1734
There's nothing wrong with having a dry reception just put it in the invitation.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-08-2012, 09:24 PM
 
15,546 posts, read 11,971,143 times
Reputation: 32595
Quote:
Originally Posted by sweetchas View Post
There's nothing wrong with having a dry reception just put it in the invitation.
That seems tacky. Guests shouldn't automatically assume you will be liquoring them up, you shouldn't have to put a "Btw, there will be no alcohol" on the invitation.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-08-2012, 11:15 PM
 
Location: Duluth, Minnesota, USA
7,641 posts, read 18,086,955 times
Reputation: 6913
All the wedding receptions I've been to have featured a DJ. After the initial obligatory songs, he took requests from the audience. I haven't been to a wedding in seven years, but the idea of an iPod and "Jambox" just doesn't seem right to me. For one thing, you would really need LOUD speakers and second, it's just not the same without strobe / disco lights, etc. You would also need somebody to announce the dollar dance, etc.

How much do DJs usually charge these days? My math teacher back in 8th grade DJ'ed at weddings and school dances on the side.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-09-2012, 01:08 AM
 
Location: Long Island, NY
1,775 posts, read 3,776,753 times
Reputation: 1894
At our wedding, we had a DJ and a full sit down dinner, cocktail hour and open bar (top shelf liquor). We paid slightly under $6K for the reception alone (60-75 people).

I would never do the "play an IPod" thing..I find that terribly tacky...I also wouldn't have it be a dry event. In my particular circle of friends and family, not having liquor at a big shindig like a wedding is a major no-no. I agree w JDawg, here in NY- we all go big, or we go home.

I have only been to 1 wedding where I had a miserable time,,it was a high school friend who got married in Orlando, FL and cheaped out on the reception. It was at an Irish Pub, only 3 entree selections, and cash bar, no music or entertainment - basically whatever the jukebox was playing at the bar. We ate our food (tiny portions), paid for our soda and hightailed it home because the entire affair was just so lame.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-09-2012, 08:38 AM
 
Location: NY metro area
7,796 posts, read 16,377,425 times
Reputation: 10808
Quote:
Originally Posted by tvdxer View Post
All the wedding receptions I've been to have featured a DJ. After the initial obligatory songs, he took requests from the audience. I haven't been to a wedding in seven years, but the idea of an iPod and "Jambox" just doesn't seem right to me. For one thing, you would really need LOUD speakers and second, it's just not the same without strobe / disco lights, etc. You would also need somebody to announce the dollar dance, etc.

How much do DJs usually charge these days? My math teacher back in 8th grade DJ'ed at weddings and school dances on the side.
It was a small wedding at a B&B. The sound from the Jambox suited the room fine. Strobe lights would have been out of place.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-09-2012, 09:00 AM
 
Location: NY metro area
7,796 posts, read 16,377,425 times
Reputation: 10808
Quote:
Originally Posted by LegalDiva View Post
At our wedding, we had a DJ and a full sit down dinner, cocktail hour and open bar (top shelf liquor). We paid slightly under $6K for the reception alone (60-75 people).
That's actually a pretty good price per head for LI. Usually a rehearsal dinner runs 5k for far fewer guests.


Quote:
Originally Posted by LegalDiva View Post

I would never do the "play an IPod" thing..I find that terribly tacky...I also wouldn't have it be a dry event. In my particular circle of friends and family, not having liquor at a big shindig like a wedding is a major no-no. I agree w JDawg, here in NY- we all go big, or we go home.
How would you know the difference between an iPod playing in the background or a DJ? These days DJs use computers...aka a bigger iPod. It's not like they're up there mixing vinyl.

The irony is that I find wedding DJs to be incredibly tacky. I booked my guy because I wanted the music to be heard and they were to be unseen. Basic announcements only. NYers tend to be followers. There's nothing unique about the weddings around here, despite the cost factor.





Quote:
Originally Posted by LegalDiva View Post
I have only been to 1 wedding where I had a miserable time,,it was a high school friend who got married in Orlando, FL and cheaped out on the reception. It was at an Irish Pub, only 3 entree selections, and cash bar, no music or entertainment - basically whatever the jukebox was playing at the bar. We ate our food (tiny portions), paid for our soda and hightailed it home because the entire affair was just so lame.
Most receptions only offer 3 entrees...even big weddings here in NY.

If you had a crappy time, are you sure it wasn't because of the their guests? That's usually the biggest determining factor for me.




------------------------------------

One of my favorite weddings was in Newport, RI. A clambake, tent wedding alongside a historic home overlooking the water.

I have yet to walk away from a LI wedding and been wowed or said I had an amazing time. They're all the same format.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-09-2012, 08:02 PM
 
Location: Brooklyn, New York
1,192 posts, read 1,807,936 times
Reputation: 1734
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sundaydrive00 View Post
That seems tacky. Guests shouldn't automatically assume you will be liquoring them up, you shouldn't have to put a "Btw, there will be no alcohol" on the invitation.
Ugh you missed the point most people expect alcohol by putting no alcohol in the invite nips it in the bud. Because its not a reception or party if theirs no hooch involved....
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-09-2012, 08:21 PM
 
15,546 posts, read 11,971,143 times
Reputation: 32595
Quote:
Originally Posted by sweetchas View Post
Ugh you missed the point most people expect alcohol by putting no alcohol in the invite nips it in the bud. Because its not a reception or party if theirs no hooch involved....
No, I know what the point of putting it in the invitation is, I just find it tacky.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships > Weddings

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 08:06 AM.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top