What do you think of destination weddings? (marriage, fiance, husband)
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Speaking from a purely secular (well, not totally, but you get the point), I think they're kind of an extravagance. More importantly, they seem to put the emphasis on the wedding ceremony and not the marriage itself.
What also annoys me is Catholics getting married outside the / a church. Maybe it's because I'm Catholic, but it would probably annoy me even if I wasn't. A couple will usually elect to have a marriage on a beach, or in a field, or even in one of those "wedding parks" (a generally scenic plot of land owned by a company who specializes in weddings). Besides not being sacramental and, as a rule, a sin (from a Catholic point of view), it just seems like an example of unbecoming individualism, and placing the ceremony above the marriage. There are many beautiful churches to have weddings in.
I don't see the point of destination weddings--why not go there by yourselves on your honeymoon? If most of your family has to fly to your wedding anyway, I suppose it might not matter that much whether they fly to Topeka or Cancun. In general, though, I think people would prefer to choose their own vacations.
I was married in a church but believe that God is everywhere. That church was important to my husband, so our wedding was there. I don't believe that vows made to God are any more significant spoken in a church than in a field. God is there. But then again I am not a Catholic.
Some people feel closer to God outside in nature than inside a building.
I think it is rather presumptuous to think a bunch of people (or any people really) are going to be willing to pay high airfares to be at your wedding. I would never ask anyone to do that. I can see doing it if you want a very small wedding and have the resources to pay to fly those few people out. Otherwise, you are pretty much choosing the location over the people.
I think that it really depends on the circumstances. Let's say that your key relatives and friends are spread all over the country and will have to fly to the wedding anyway then perhaps having it in a resort area rather than Little Podunk, Midwest State might work out. But don't be disappointed if you have a very small turnout.
But, if all/most of your relatives & close friends are in one city or area than I think that a destination wedding is not appropriate. Even if your favorite aunt can afford to go (in todays economy very unlikely) perhaps she would rather use her few vacation days doing something else.
The only exception might be if you were very wealthy and could pay for everyone's airfare & expenses.
My son & fiance once attended a wedding at a fancy resort in California. .The wedding couple and their families did all that they could to make it an affordable, fun long weekend for everyone. Between,the welcome breakfast, wedding dinner, picnic lunches, late supper on the boat trip, etc. the guests didn't need to pay for food all memorial weekend. There was a chartered boat trip, visits to a botanical garden and other events in addition to the wedding activities. The only cost for the guests were travel expenses to the wedding & the housing costs. The hosts made arrangement with a nearby campground and a lower price motel for guests to stay there if they couldn't afford the prices of the expensive resort. The hosts even provided transportation from the campground & motel to the events.
My son & fiance had a great time. But, if they would have had to buy expensive resort food all weekend, or pay the expensive room rates at the resort they never would have been able to afford it.
In general, have the wedding in your hometown and save the destination for your honeymoon.
I think destination weddings are fine for couples who just want to "elope" or maybe have very few guests. Maybe just immediate family. A destination wedding would be cooler than just going down to the municipal building to elope, for instance.
Well - I had one and thought it was the most amazing thing ever! You can think we were presumptuous, selfish, ridiculous, extravagant, and anything else you would like and that's fine with us! We had 50 of our closest friends and family members come and we all had the time of our lives! Most people said it was the best wedding they had ever been to and pretty much everyone made a vacation out of it. Fact is, I'm from Los Angeles, my husband is from Orlando but most of his family was from and still living in Memphis, and my husband and I were living in New York City - as were most of our friends. So where could we have gotten married that wasn't going to be a destination wedding for most people? Also, I had been engaged before and didn't want to have same wedding different groom. My husband wanted to get married in a Hawaiian shirt and shorts and we thought what better place to do that than in Hawaii?
Anyway - a wedding day is about the couple getting married. If you don't approve of their choice of cities, venues, religion, partner, registry, dress, etc. - that's fine. You don't have to go. Only my husband's immediate family came to the wedding - and that was fine with us. Even if we had had the wedding some place else - I doubt anyone else would have come. Plus - they are all very religious and conservative and we are not so they might not have had very much fun at our wedding anyway. It was very laid back - we even had hula dancers during the cocktail hour! All in all - I wouldn't have changed a thing about our wedding. It was one of the best days of our lives!
Well - I had one and thought it was the most amazing thing ever! You can think we were presumptuous, selfish, ridiculous, extravagant, and anything else you would like and that's fine with us! We had 50 of our closest friends and family members come and we all had the time of our lives! Most people said it was the best wedding they had ever been to and pretty much everyone made a vacation out of it. Fact is, I'm from Los Angeles, my husband is from Orlando but most of his family was from and still living in Memphis, and my husband and I were living in New York City - as were most of our friends. So where couldwe have gotten married that wasn't going to be a destinationwedding for most people? Also, I had been engaged before and didn't want to have same wedding different groom. My husband wanted to get married in a Hawaiian shirt and shorts and we thought what better place to do that than in Hawaii?
Anyway - a wedding day is about the couple getting married. If you don't approve of their choice of cities, venues, religion, partner, registry, dress, etc. - that's fine. You don't have to go. Only my husband's immediate family came to the wedding - and that was fine with us. Even if we had had the wedding some place else - I doubt anyone else would have come. Plus - they are all very religious and conservative and we are not so they might not have had very much fun at our wedding anyway. It was very laid back - we even had hula dancers during the cocktail hour! All in all - I wouldn't have changed a thing about our wedding. It was one of the best days of our lives!
This is the best reason to plan a destination wedding. If many people already have to fly to the wedding you may as well make it to someplace extra fun and exciting.
This is the best reason to plan a destination wedding. If many people already have to fly to the wedding you may as well make it to someplace extra fun and exciting.
That's what we thought as well! Plus - the place that I would have wanted to get married at in my hometown was the place where my other wedding was supposed to have been. That didn't seem to be a very good idea!!!
We paid for a few people in the wedding that couldn't afford it and we paid for the condos for my bridesmaids and a couple of our friends.
Like I said - we wouldn't have changed a thing. It was absolutely wonderful!
Well - I had one and thought it was the most amazing thing ever! You can think we were presumptuous, selfish, ridiculous, extravagant, and anything else you would like and that's fine with us! We had 50 of our closest friends and family members come and we all had the time of our lives! Most people said it was the best wedding they had ever been to and pretty much everyone made a vacation out of it. Fact is, I'm from Los Angeles, my husband is from Orlando but most of his family was from and still living in Memphis, and my husband and I were living in New York City - as were most of our friends. So where could we have gotten married that wasn't going to be a destination wedding for most people? Also, I had been engaged before and didn't want to have same wedding different groom. My husband wanted to get married in a Hawaiian shirt and shorts and we thought what better place to do that than in Hawaii?
Anyway - a wedding day is about the couple getting married. If you don't approve of their choice of cities, venues, religion, partner, registry, dress, etc. - that's fine. You don't have to go. Only my husband's immediate family came to the wedding - and that was fine with us. Even if we had had the wedding some place else - I doubt anyone else would have come. Plus - they are all very religious and conservative and we are not so they might not have had very much fun at our wedding anyway. It was very laid back - we even had hula dancers during the cocktail hour! All in all - I wouldn't have changed a thing about our wedding. It was one of the best days of our lives!
Well they could have approved of all of the above but just couldn't afford to go, and that's why destination weddings can be problematic, but it's your wedding and ultimately you should have it exactly as you wish- just know that there are consequences for some of your choices.
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