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My fiance made well into the six figures. A $500 ring was fine by me.
Why would anyone be insulted by a loving gesture just because it didn't cost a small fortune? Doesn't sound like someone who's getting married for the right reasons.
I agree. It seems women who are with a rich man feel entitled to his money, therefore, expect him to spend all kinds of money on them. Imagine if a guy felt entitled to have sex whenever he wanted simply because his girl is hot. Same thing.
Yes. Lots of women out there put a price tag on a man's decision to marry them "You want to marry me? It will cost you $_______ (ring's price)" .
My girlfriend of 2 years and I have been talking, just talking... about what would be expected in the way of marriage. My gf says she wants to get married to me. She said that she would want a 5 kt diamond or gold ring which is expected to cost anywhere between 4 and 5k. I don't know if she was joking but she said, "And don't try to slip somethin by me and think I won't take it to get it appraised!"
FWIW, I'm a woman.
I think that attitude is ridiculous and I'd find a way to excuse myself out of that relationship. Those are the words of a deeply materialistic person who cares more about what other people think than about her actual relationship with you (or whoever the person is who buys her what she wants; IME people like that just look for someone to fill the role they have created in their own heads).
The ring is a meaningless trifle that represents only an idea. Yes, I was into having a ring when I got engaged, but I had no preconceived ideas about how much it should cost or what I "required" him to do. I never got my ring appraised, why would I? I just wanted the symbolic action of him offering me a representation of his love - just the effort of getting one was all I felt was important about the whole ring thing.
I don't know what my ring cost, but his cost about $200 and my wedding band cost about $400 and I love them, and I love my engagement ring as well, because he chose it and put the thought and effort into it.
It's not "crap" to me. My love recently proposed and the ring was beautiful, expensive (40k) and I was thrilled. If he had bought me something cheap I would have felt... horrible.
Engagement rings don't have to be super expensive, but if the ring is just $90, I mean, unless the guy is broke he must not think much of you.
JFC. It is total nonsense to spend that kind of money on a ring. Give that money to charity and buy a piece of tin for your finger if you're any sort of decent person.
Ugh. My skin just crawls when I read things like that. Seriously, what kind of person equates someone's love with money, or vice versa?
And for what it's worth -- when I was talking -- just talking to a boyfriend -- I talked a lot of garbage, too.
But when the right man walked into my life, it didn't matter about an engagement ring. We looked one day and I spied something I thought was pretty. It was a boatload of money, but when he showed up with his great grandmother's ruby, I was happy and proud to wear it.
I can't remember what the one at the jewelry store looked like. I remember it was pretty and very stylish, which means it was gaudy as heck and way too big and probably a set of some sort -- because that was the fashion at that time.
Which is also why so many of my friends didn't get diamonds.
My fiance made well into the six figures. A $500 ring was fine by me.
Why would anyone be insulted by a loving gesture just because it didn't cost a small fortune? Doesn't sound like someone who's getting married for the right reasons.
You are fine with a 500-dollar ring. Soooo... for you, that was appropriate.
Pick some other gift he might buy you that DOES matter to you. I dunno. A mountain bike. Let's say you're really into biking and he's really into cars. You both agree that these are priority items, and you're married, so your money is household money.
He refuses to get you a top of the line bike. Even though he knows it is what you'd prefer. BUT. He goes out and buys himself a top of the line luxury car.
Would you not think he was cheap then?
That is the point. And why I said that a man with the means to purchase a more expensive, higher quality ring with a fiancee/wife who wants a higher quality ring but thinks she should accept a 500-dollar ring is just being miserly.
A guy who is broke whose GF expects a 3 carat flawless diamond is being inconsiderate.
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I agree. It seems women who are with a rich man feel entitled to his money, therefore, expect him to spend all kinds of money on them. Imagine if a guy felt entitled to have sex whenever he wanted simply because his girl is hot. Same thing.
Yes. Lots of women out there put a price tag on a man's decision to marry them "You want to marry me? It will cost you $_______ (ring's price)" .
You know that is not the point. The point is that the rich man who knows he's dating a woman who appreciates fine jewelry is not likely to present her with a cheap ring.
The rich man who knows he is dating a woman that isn't into jewelry is free to spend as little as he wants.
The engagement ring is a statement. It says "I want to marry you and am presenting this ring as a symbol of this pledge."
Soooo...does the wise man not choose a symbol appropriate to the woman he is asking to be his wife?
THAT is the issue. It's not the money.
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I dont love my husband any more or less because of it. I also dont use it to show off to anyone. Its a ring, thats it!
I don't use my engagement ring to show off to anyone, either. Except I wear it every day and people see it. Same way you wear yours, I reckon. Mine cost about 250x more than yours, but it is simple and appropriate for everyday wear. It suits my style. And it is likely why my husband chose it.
What's the real point? Are you suggesting that women who wear less expensive rings are somehow more in love with their spouses than those with more expensive rings? I do not see a correlation at all.
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My fiance made well into the six figures. A $500 ring was fine by me.
Why would anyone be insulted by a loving gesture just because it didn't cost a small fortune? Doesn't sound like someone who's getting married for the right reasons.
Exactly! The ring is purely symbolic. It's the love that is precious not the ring...geez! Unfortunately, many women, especially here in Southern California use rings and weddings as a platform to show off to their friends how their future husband outdid everyone else. The whole concept of marriage and commitment has been devalued.
What's the real point? Are you suggesting that women who wear less expensive rings are somehow more in love with their spouses than those with more expensive rings? I do not see a correlation at all.
Not at all. The point being made is that whether it's a $80 ring or a $20,000 ring the symbolism is equal in value. If your husband could truly afford to give you a $20k ring then good for you and it's great! But a vast pool of people don't have 2 nickels in their savings account yet spend obscene amounts of money on rings and weddings at the "demand" of their future wives. Women have come to expect this because way too many weak men give into it and spend way more than they could actually afford.
If true affordability would be taken into account for the average American, men would be buying $300-500 rings not $10,000 rings.
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