Engagement's off - who gets the ring? (article) (dresses, parties, guy)

[JustJulia]

It's a gift, but if you want to give it back, fine. He broke it off, thank God. I would have given it back, but he didn't ask, so I didn't offer. I did return all the "house" gifts his parents gave to us that Christmas (dishes and stuff). The whole thing was pretty amicable.

Hocked the ring later.

[Tropical Trouble]

Originally Posted by phonelady61

Okay seems like I have everyone of you beat . two hours before the wedding he called on his brothers cell phone and told him to tell me he could not go through with it . and we had the reception hall waiting for us after the wedding too . my dad had already paid for it all and he was p.o. ed to say the least . well my dad went after him in court and dad got half his money back and i kept a 20,000.00 ring and sold it later to a girl i knew who was getting married and she was loving every minute of the ring . everyone had a good time including me we all ate , drank and were merry .

Yup, you got me beat My 19 days from the wedding break up seems like I got let down easy

I've had the rings at my parents' house for a couple years because I couldn't stand to look at them and didn't really have a good way to sell them in my podunk little town. Now that I'm in a bigger city, Mom put them in the mail (registered) today and I'm going to get a few quotes and see how much I can sell them for.

[beowulf7]

Originally Posted by lilbiti17

I just went through this situation. My fiance broke off our engagement with only three months till our wedding because he said he fell in love with someone else. Two weeks later he married her! I kept the ring! I had every intention of wearing that ring for the rest of my life and being his wife. He broke off the engagement and he broke my heart. Why should he get that ring back. He had promised that he would love me for the rest of our lives and he broke his part of the contract to marry me. He also promised that he would pay for me to finish nursing school, so I sold the ring to pay for tutition. I dont feel like I was wrong at all for keeping the ring and I never will!

Sorry to hear your fiance was a two-timer. Did he ask for the ring back?

Originally Posted by phonelady61

Okay seems like I have everyone of you beat . two hours before the wedding he called on his brothers cell phone and told him to tell me he could not go through with it . and we had the reception hall waiting for us after the wedding too . my dad had already paid for it all and he was p.o. ed to say the least . well my dad went after him in court and dad got half his money back and i kept a 20,000.00 ring and sold it later to a girl i knew who was getting married and she was loving every minute of the ring . everyone had a good time including me we all ate , drank and were merry .

Wow, so close to the wedding! He sounds like the "Runaway Groom".

I don't know his income situation, but it seems ludicrous to spend $20k for an engagement ring. Fiscally irresponsible wouldn't even begin to describe it. Then again, if he's a millionaire where tens of thousands barely puts a dent to his bank account, then I guess it's all good (at least for you, given the circumstance).

[Tia 914]

Originally Posted by beowulf7

I came across this article on CNN on who gets the engagement ring if the wedding is canceled. The short answer is it depends on the state and possibly situation (e.g. who called off the wedding). It's an interesting article.

If people would like to share personal experience, feel free to mention it.

I'm familiar with the differences in states (although not personal experience)--
what I'm most familiar with is the woman usually returns the ring simply because it is "the right thing" to do-- whether the guy spent a lot of money on it, or whether it was a family heirloom, etc.

I've found in this state, however, it's entirely different-- the ring legally belongs to the guy until/unless they are actually married.
in my opinion, in this type of situation all a ring means is it's a sign of the guy's "ownership" of the woman.

[temptation001]

Regardless of laws, I would give back the ring because it symbolizes a union between him and I. He can keep it or sell it or pawn it or whatever. The meaning of the ring is that 2 people will be united in matrimony. Once thats off the table, the ring needs to go back to him because he paid for it as a symbol of our engagement/marriage. So its not exactly mine unless I actually marry him Then I would consider it as mine.

[wisconsin woman]

Interesting. Ive always heard too, that the person who breaks it off should just let the other have it (back).

[Softtail_Honey]

Originally Posted by Miborn

No it depends on who broke it off and why!

If he breaks it off she keeps the ring period!
If he breaks it off because of something she did like sleeping around sort of thing than she should give the ring back.
If she breaks it off because he did something than she keeps the ring.
If she breaks it off because she does not want to marry him than she should give the ring back.

Exactly, I couldn't have said it better.

[nrfitchett4]

rings should be returned no matter the circumstances.
similar story. My ex-wife cheats on me and we get a divorce. She keeps the heirloom quilt my mother made for us as a wedding present.
The only time I wanted to kill my ex.


p.s. man there are some materialist people out there.

[cherry251]

The person who paid for the ring should keep it. It was a symbol of love; now it`s not.

[bobmulk]

Why would a woman want a ring from an engagement that has been broken off? Do they want that constant reminder? Are they going to wear it? Am I missing something here?