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Location: Stuck on the East Coast, hoping to head West
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kibbiekat
You don't RSVP to a save the date card. It has nothing to do with pinning you down or wanting to invite other people. It is about making sure you know when it is, so don't have to book a flight inside of 6 weeks.
I have never received a save the date and NOT been contacted by someone and asked if I'm planning to come. In my experience, these cards are requiring a response, even if it is not a formal one.
I've received a save the date, been contacted by the bride, explained that I doubt I'll be able to make it, and then NOT received an invitation----more than once.
Re airline tickets, the best time to buy is 47 days (roughly 6 weeks) in advance.
You don't RSVP to a save the date card. It has nothing to do with pinning you down or wanting to invite other people. It is about making sure you know when it is, so don't have to book a flight inside of 6 weeks.
Quote:
Originally Posted by bande1102
I have never received a save the date and NOT been contacted by someone and asked if I'm planning to come. In my experience, these cards are requiring a response, even if it is not a formal one.
I've received a save the date, been contacted by the bride, explained that I doubt I'll be able to make it, and then NOT received an invitation----more than once.
Re airline tickets, the best time to buy is 47 days (roughly 6 weeks) in advance.
Hmm. I've received "save the date" cards (I don't respond), and they've always been followed up with formal invitations that included an RSVP card to return.
I used them, most of my friends have and I still get them currently. I've always found them incredibly helpful, but I also have a large family and group if friends spread across the globe so the early heads up is nice.
Save the dates do not get a response. At least none of the ones we ever received did.
I am glad to get them, because then I can plan accordingly. Vacation time, flights, etc need to be thought out and booked.
And with today's smaller wedding receptions, it is nice to know in advance if you "made the cut", so to speak.
Save the dates do not get a response. At least none of the ones we ever received did.
I am glad to get them, because then I can plan accordingly. Vacation time, flights, etc need to be thought out and booked.
And with today's smaller wedding receptions, it is nice to know in advance if you "made the cut", so to speak.
I appreciate them too. They carry no obligation to attend, it's a head's up that an invitation will follow. And I have never had a follow up contact from the engaged couple beyond the actual invite.
I have never received a save the date and NOT been contacted by someone and asked if I'm planning to come. In my experience, these cards are requiring a response, even if it is not a formal one.
I've received a save the date, been contacted by the bride, explained that I doubt I'll be able to make it, and then NOT received an invitation----more than once.
Re airline tickets, the best time to buy is 47 days (roughly 6 weeks) in advance.
I have never been contacted after a save the date card.
Quote:
Originally Posted by SeaOfGrass
Hmm. I've received "save the date" cards (I don't respond), and they've always been followed up with formal invitations that included an RSVP card to return.
We did save the dates, most of our guest list was very far away (FL wedding, NY family).
We included NOTHING about RSVP'ing on the card. I didn't ask anyone if they got it or if they were coming until we sent out invitations ~6 weeks before the wedding.
Much of my husbands family needed a lot of time to save up tickets for airfare and arrange time off work.
If people found it rude, that sucks, but it wasn't intended to be. It's quite common with more and more out of town weddings IMO. I have never RSVP'ed to one and have never been asked to RSVP to one.
Plane tickets might be cheaper 47 days out (in fact, this is how I purchase), but if you are budgeting for travel, a save the date in my opinion is a wonderful courtesy. Thinking it is supposed to "Pin you down" means the person is a dick anyway (I likely would RSVP NO and send my regards if someone was pressuring me).
Also, A and B lists were not a thing at my wedding. I had one list and that was it. My husbands sister, on the other hand, had ABC lists. She had her RSVP date ridiculously early, it was really obvious. To make it even better, she's already married.
Yeah my save the dates went out to everyone late. I had no such thing as an A or B list. but so what if they wanted to know if I couldn't make it early so they can let someone else attend? It wouldn't bother me since I know how stressful it is trying to plan a wedding on a budget. I would have loved to be able to include some more people if I had the money!
I have never been contacted after a save the date card.
Same here. And I always got an invitation shortly after the "save the date" card.
DH and I did not send "save the date" cards. Nobody from out of state was invited, and the furthest-away relatives only had to drive 300 miles. Easy to do on a weekend (the wedding was on a Saturday).
I don't see a problem with the cards, especially for out-of-town guests. It's not just the cost of the flight, but also getting vacation time, the hotel, car, etc. For some, coming up with that kind of cash 6 weeks in advance is just too much of a financial burden.
I had one friend who sent me a Save the Date for her destination wedding in a tropical location about a 13-hour plane ride from me. I told her when I received the card that unfortunately I didn't think I'd be able to attend. Despite the fact that I successfully received the card at my home address, later on she harangued me for my address for the invite as if she had no clue where I lived. I thought it was a bit over the top for her to pester me about my address despite the fact that she'd not bothered to contact me at all about non wedding-related items in the interim to even know if I had moved (I had not). She ended up not sending me an invite, which was just fine with me.
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