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Let it go, OP. This is one blip in the grand scheme.
That's what I say. Let it go. Approach it with a sense of humor.
This is how she is and apparently a precursor of what having her for a sister-in-law will be like. Might as well make the choice to take the high road now and save yourself hours of future frustration.
You should squeeze him as best you can. He may not realize he's not technically invited, and as the host, it's your responsibility to ensure guests are comfortable.
If there is truly no room for him, then you or your fiance needs to firmly tell the sister "We're at full capacity. You cannot bring a guest."
At this point she is not budging, the guest is coming and there is no way we can talk her out it. Tried the 'we are full' approach to which she told me, 'oh there will be no-shows' (which, she is prob right, there will - but still) ... so I have no choice but to take the high road (which a previous poster mentioned) ... I do want to have a good relationship with her but I don't think it is right, when the day is not about her.
You could contact the +1 yourself and in the most contrite way possible, tell them there isn't room. Say your sister in law didn't know this when she decided to ask them. Apologize profusely but hold your ground.
If you let this woman run the show now, you're setting a dangerous precedent.
You could contact the +1 yourself and in the most contrite way possible, tell them there isn't room. Say your sister in law didn't know this when she decided to ask them. Apologize profusely but hold your ground.
If you let this woman run the show now, you're setting a dangerous precedent.
I could but she doesn't know who she is bringing yet ... and I don't know any of her friends (she lives across country, I just see pics on facebook) .. we are having the wedding out by her not where I live
You could contact the +1 yourself and in the most contrite way possible, tell them there isn't room. Say your sister in law didn't know this when she decided to ask them. Apologize profusely but hold your ground.
If you let this woman run the show now, you're setting a dangerous precedent.
Am I missing why you’d invite someone to be in a bridal party and then contritely tell the +1 they are not welcome? That would just open up a whole can of worms with the sister boycotting the wedding and causing family drama over what? $160? Is $160 that much to spend for family harmony?
Am I missing why you’d invite someone to be in a bridal party and then contritely tell the +1 they are not welcome? That would just open up a whole can of worms with the sister boycotting the wedding and causing family drama over what? $160? Is $160 that much to spend for family harmony?
I did not invite her to be in the bridal party ... she threw a hissy fit and pretty much demanded she be in it. She was really upset with me so I had to ask her to get her to stop throwing a hissy fit. (mind you, she is 40)
What a second! Your are expecting the wedding party to pay for their own make-up and hair for your wedding? Now, this may be part of the problem. Where I come from, if the bride requests that her wedding party have professional hair & makeup and professional manicures and pedicures then she (or her parents or the groom) pays that expense. Always. Including the tips. Now, you may not have that expectation where you come from.
Perhaps, she does not have money for a wedding gift because she did not expect to have to pay for the professional hair & makeup (that you requested)?
Yes and it is also customary to give each bridal party member a plus one.
Is it possible the SIL is bringing along her friend to keep an eye on her young kids while she is occupied with wedding party details? Just think of her as a babysitter who will enjoy a meal otherwise going to waste if there are no-shows.
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