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Old 08-03-2015, 09:25 AM
 
2 posts, read 17,604 times
Reputation: 17

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I thought moving to Florida would be somewhat of an adventure. My fiance and i recently got engaged. As soon as he proposed i had to make the daunting decision to make the big move to Southern Florida with him. He was relocating his business and his staff from NY was coming with him. Im only 27. My family and friends are a huge source in my happiness. I love New York. Its my roots and i never planned on leaving it. Being a full time student in the teaching career i knew leaving NY would also take me away from my schooling and i would have to back pedal a bit here in my education. With my back against a wall i made the choice to come here. And now im living with the choice i made and having a hard time. School doesnt start for another three weeks. The whole summer has put me in bit of a dark place and depression. Having more free time than i know what to do with, and no one to spend my days with has been so hard. Usually if this happened in NY i could call up a friend or family member. Hell, i would even go on hikes alone. I never felt depressed in NY. Here iam. First time in my life where i have researcged depression and diagnoised myself with it.
Im a very active person. I stay in shape. I eat healthy. I love animals. So for the most part i keep busy in the gym, i find cycling classes, i've volunteered at a local animal rescue. I cook a lot. But all those things are done alone and out of my comfort zone. When they're done i feel bored, restless and lonely. Has anyone been in this situation before? Or anyone who can relate to it? The hardest part i'm finding is finding a way to pull myself out of the rut and COMMITTING to it. If anyone can shed some light on this or some positive insight i would greatly appreciate it.
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Old 08-03-2015, 11:33 AM
 
Location: South Florida
5,021 posts, read 7,450,618 times
Reputation: 5466
I'm so sorry you're hurting.

South Florida's not what people who don't live here think it is.
It's going to take some time to adjust.

Have you looked at meetup.com?
It's NOT a dating site.. it's to meet people with similar interests, make friends, get out of the house and do things..
Since hardly anyone who lives here is from here.. people are eager to make friends.
Good luck!
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Old 08-03-2015, 11:44 AM
 
Location: north bama
3,507 posts, read 764,833 times
Reputation: 6447
I`m just a little north of you in Alabama .. I once saw a car in a parking lot with a bumper sticker saying " I miss New York " .. I shot a hole in one of their tires .. busted out a window and cut their seats up and stole the radio .. I put a sign on the car .." I hope this helps " .. HA !! ....but there is no place like home for sure ...
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Old 08-03-2015, 12:59 PM
 
2 posts, read 17,604 times
Reputation: 17
Unhappy meetup.com

I have the meet up app. A girl friend of mine told me to check it out. So far i havent had any luck. ITs a lot of vegan meet ups and overall a older crowd which i'm not used too. Mom groups etc. I did try though
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Old 08-03-2015, 04:18 PM
 
2,956 posts, read 2,342,545 times
Reputation: 6475
It's not easy to move to a new area and have to learn everything over again. You sound like a young 27 from your post. Have you discussed this at all with your fiancée? You aren't going to move 1400 miles away and find instant best friends and family. That stuff takes years to develop. The bottom line is when you move you move because you are starting a new life with the people you move with and not pine about your old life.

Sounds like you shouldn't of moved. My advice is to get as involved as you can, you're rapidly approaching the "mom" group yourself and get it all figured out before you get married and especially before you have kids. If it's not going to work for you it simply won't work. Only you will know if you gave it an honest chance or not.

This coming from someone that would rather live somewhere else but realize it's not the place but the people I'm with. My wife and daughter are the most important people to me not my other family or where I live. Not to say they aren't important, I just don't live my life for them.

Where I live isn't important, who I live with is. That is my partner and my life. Figure out if that is the case with you and you'll have your answer. Everyone says I love you but the only true test of love is time.
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Old 08-03-2015, 06:36 PM
 
Location: O-Town
1,285 posts, read 1,397,374 times
Reputation: 740
Come to Orlando. You'll feel like your in Spanish Harlem.
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Old 08-03-2015, 07:07 PM
 
Location: FLORIDA
8,963 posts, read 8,918,308 times
Reputation: 3462
^^^ South FL is even worse.

I dont know what the infatuation is with ppl from NY moving to FL (you basically are passing by places like Charlotte, Raleigh, Greensboro, Greenville SC, Atlanta burbs, Asheville NC that offer a better quality of life), but whatever.

I hope you are happy here, or he changes his mind for you.
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Old 08-04-2015, 05:51 AM
 
1,006 posts, read 2,661,942 times
Reputation: 747
Hi, I just moved here too from NY, but I'm in my 50s. I tried it in 2003 and moved back, but as my parents are getting pretty old, I am doing it again. I miss NY too, but I was drowning financially. I have similar interests--animals, the gym. When I miss NY I think about Indian Point. I lived very close to it and glad to be away now. NY is great, but you need so much money to survive there. This summer has been really hot up there as well and there is a huge tick problem in the suburbs. There are many disadvantages to living in NY but I understand why you miss it. I'm enjoying it here but maybe because I'm a lot older than you are. I also researched all the negatives of FL and my expectations were really low and now I'm pleasantly surprised. I hope it works out for you.
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Old 08-04-2015, 08:29 AM
 
Location: O-Town
1,285 posts, read 1,397,374 times
Reputation: 740
Quote:
Originally Posted by StreetSmarts View Post
^^^ South FL is even worse.
Well, don't the Cubans work at jobs? Or are they on the dole too?
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Old 08-04-2015, 11:11 AM
 
21 posts, read 42,858 times
Reputation: 49
Hang in there! I felt that way after my first move...3 moves ago! I was depressed for a while, for sure. I'm about 6 weeks into my most recent move. Here's my advice to you: You have a choice to make: move back home where everything is wonderful all of the time (I bet you might recall soooommmmeee negatives to NY...think back to January) or stay here. And, if you decide to stay here - take all negativity out of your language - stop talking about hating it, being negative, cry to your BFFs back home. (When you think it / say it / hear / it becomes more penetrating.) If staying here is what you choose - embrace it. Challenge yourself to do one thing a day (yes - every single day) that forces you to get out and be with people. Talk to people. (Yes - some people will think you're a stalker, but others will engage with you. And, who cares about the former group?!) I think you will be surprised at the results. I marvel every year when I write out my Christmas cards of all of the people who are in my life that I absolutely love that I never would have met if I didn't spend a little bit of time being uncomfortable....when you are uncomfortable you're growing...

I'll stop lecturing now!
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