Problems in Boca Raton (West Palm Beach, Palm Beach: condos, living in, friendly)

[faithfulFrank]

Dear Daisy,
Just know that people DO care......many here have given some good advice.

Think about what you like to do, then find others who share that same interest. I.E.; If you like to read, find some book clubs. If you like to ride bikes, there are riding clubs. Many libraries have different activities.

Also, there are many good church activities, many of them not "religious" where you can find good, caring people.

Also, if you don't mind me asking, have you told your doctor lately how you feel? I've found that many times there is a physical component to your feelings. Serotonin levels could be off, etc. There ARE helpful regimens that DO make a difference.

I've found that many times one cannot trust one's emotions....perception is everything, and things are not always as they seem.

If you like, do ONE new thing a day and keep us posted. When you track your journey with others, it could really help!

Frank D.

[BornInFL]

Yup, I have heard this over and over again about the area, and being from S Florida originally, I agree. Many of the people there are snobby, cold, and unfriendly. So unlike many other major metro areas of the south including Atlanta and Charlotte. Why not try another state altogether because generally, all of South Florida is like that now. Orlando and Tampa are the same way, so I would avoid those areas too. My suggestion would be Northern FL or Atlanta/Charlotte burbs. Lower cost of living, better jobs/pay, and BY FAR (in general) friendlier people.

PS- If you decide to stay in S FL, I would stay north of WPB. Look into the Acreage, RPB, Jupiter, PBG, Stuart, Vero areas...etc...

[GinaJ]

Originally Posted by daisymae4

Thank you ,Gina, for your kind sentiments. You are right about some of my problem being loneliness. I'm sure in time I will adjust and be fine.

p.s. I really don't have much choice unless I pick up and move back to Maryland which I can't afford right now.

No problem. You seem like a very nice person and just going through another phase in life which can be a hard transition. I am in a similar position is I moved back to my homestate and am very upset with my choice. Like you I don't have the finances to pick up in move. It is a trapping position but until things can change I guess it is about making the best of what you have. Do you have family/friends near that you knew before? What made you move there or was it more just known as the place people retire to? I am from Mi and many people who retire or for the winter go there. I am younger 30 but went like I said to Wellington to see how I liked it so I was at a different place in life so to speak. I hope you can find a way to push yourself to join some groups and even if you meet 1 new person possibly a significant other unless married or with someone of course(don't want to be handing out bad advice) it may really help lift the mood.

[TriMT7]

Originally Posted by BornInFL

Yup, I have heard this over and over again about the area, and being from S Florida originally, I agree. Many of the people there are snobby, cold, and unfriendly. So unlike many other major metro areas of the south including Atlanta and Charlotte. Why not try another state altogether because generally, all of South Florida is like that now. Orlando and Tampa are the same way, so I would avoid those areas too. My suggestion would be Northern FL or Atlanta/Charlotte burbs. Lower cost of living, better jobs/pay, and BY FAR (in general) friendlier people.

PS- If you decide to stay in S FL, I would stay north of WPB. Look into the Acreage, RPB, Jupiter, PBG, Stuart, Vero areas...etc...

On the contrary, I have MUCH more interaction with my neighbors here in West Palm Beach than I did living in a "family" neighborhood in North Florida (Tallahassee). Not that they were rude, but just not as open and friendly. When I rented a condo in downtown West Palm for a year, they had building parties, sunday brunches during season, and friendly neighbors that left gifts at the door when our dog died.

When I moved just South of downtown, I see neighbors who have a monthly cocktail party at one of the residents' house, neighbors who ask if we need help putting up hurricane shutters, and people who wave and strike up random conversations.



It is just not helpful to throw blanket generalizations around. Indeed, even the advice to "stay North of West Palm Beach" isn't very helpful. I lived in Jupiter and found that while it is a VERY nice community, there's a whole lot of materialism and snobbery there as well. One wealthy friend recounted a recent transplant in her neighborhood from up North being LAUGHED AT after Christmas by some other neighborhood women because her husband ONLY got her a Coach purse, instead of something more expensive or fabulous.

[BornInFL]

Originally Posted by TriMT7

On the contrary, I have MUCH more interaction with my neighbors here in West Palm Beach than I did living in a "family" neighborhood in North Florida (Tallahassee). Not that they were rude, but just not as open and friendly. When I rented a condo downtown for a year, they had building parties, sunday brunches during season, and friendly neighbors that left gifts at the door when our dog died.

When I moved just South of downtown, I see neighbors who have a monthly cocktail party at one of the residents' house, neighbors who ask if we need help putting up hurricane shutters, and people who wave and strike up random conversations.



It is just not helpful to throw blanket generalizations around. Indeed, even the advice to "stay North of West Palm Beach" isn't very helpful. I lived in Jupiter and found that while it is a VERY nice community, there's a whole lot of materialism and snobbery there as well. One wealthy friend recounted a recent transplant in her neighborhood from up North being LAUGHED AT after Christmas by some other neighborhood women because her husband ONLY got her a Coach purse, instead of something more expensive or fabulous.

Wow, that is pretty sad. I hate to hear/see people that act like that, and it is definitely found in Jupiter too. Jupiter is safe, but not immune to snobbery, your right. Even up here in Orlando some folks are like that. Sad.

[Bette]

My goal for 2009 - to start getting social again - start inviting people over; book club, scrabble club, game night, stuff like that.

19 years ago - we did this and it was wonderful. At first, people looked at me like I was nuts but they all came and it became a monthly/weekly event at different homes. I still live in the same neighborhood.

I am going through a period of being a little lonely now and I personally feel better when I spend time with others.

[Tungsten_Udder]

According to Wikipedia, with statistics from the last United States Census (2000):

*18.9% of the population of Boca Raton is under the age of 18 (and as this is from 8 years ago, lots of those folks are now in their early/mid-20s).
*8.1% of the population of Boca Raton is between the ages of 18 and 24
* 26.4% of the population of Boca Raton is between the ages of 25 and 44.

Even assuming those percentages have gone down a bit, about 1 of every 2 people you meet in Boca Raton should be under the age of 44, with at least 1 of 10 being in their 20s.

So I don't know what you're doing wrong that you can't find people in your age range there. Surely some of those other folks in their 20s are going to have young kids, too.

As for the attitudes, that's another matter, but I highly doubt that EVERYONE in a particular geographic location has the same priorities, outlook, beliefs, etc.

Look for people who share your interests and beliefs by looking for a meetup (there's a website for this) group in the area focused on those interests and beliefs.

[FL Beaches]

We lived in Boca 15 years, then moved to Virginia. We've been here 4.5 years.

If you want to meet "real" people, join family activities. We always had our son involved in kids activities at the Y in Boca. Met a bunch of nice people through his day care center when he was little. Those parents are still our friends! We e-mail all the time. And, of course, we have a few friends from his school he attended there. There's a great mom's group at the church we attended, too.

I see it's been a few months since you originally posted. Hope you found something or some place you are happy.

[joanie55]

Good luck! Southeast Florida is old and unfriendly almost anywhere you go. Weston is much younger but I don't know about the people there. Broward County is younger and friendlier in my opinion.

[BevoInPA]

I lived in downtown Delray Beach in Pineapple Grove Village when I was 30. The building was a rental then but was probably 30% or 40% young singles and couples. I think the circle in Hollywood in Broward is similar and downtown Lauderdale is pretty good. I can't recall the name of the building but it is located at the northeast corner of US 1 and Broward Ave. I had some friends that lived there before I moved from the area.