Confused Mom

[Mernie]

Terrific, great advice csklint, this is what I hoped for when signing on to this. I will definitely look into these areas . You have touched on exactly my child. Any others words of wisdom?? Getting right on this. How do I know if an academic coach is the right person, what should I ask when interviewing them?? Thank you so much everyone who reads and responds...Mernie

[MomOfToo]

I was just going to say Ardsley as well. You may be able to pay out of district but I think they charge something crazy like 17K a year to send him there.

[Kevrltr]

I know White Plains has great special needs programs, I have a relative in one.

All the best!

Kevin O'Shea

[K&F]

I'm moving to Westchester this summer from Virginia. I have a daughter with a mood disorder. No learning disability, but a mental illness. It was thought she is bipolar (she is six and is adopted) but with more medical evals it seems that it is developmental in nature from the severe neglect she suffered as an infant.

I just spent $10K on a special ed attorney here in central Virginia to get my daughter an IEP (individualized education plan) for special ed to accommodate her disability (her mental illness). I have to save that ADD is indeed special ed, because your son has a disability which interferes with his ability to get a FREE APPROPRAITE PUBLIC EDUCATION (FAPE). Every public school system has processes to form an IEP for each child. (this is all federal law).

In my case, even after fighting, and I had to really fight - to get my daughter an IEP to accommodate her mood disorder, the plan the school system came up with is DRACONIAN and ARCHAIC.

I retained an educational specialist in Westchester and sent her my daughter's current IEP documents as well as all the private medical evals I had done. I'm looking at moving to Hastings and wanted her opinion on whether she would get a better education and better treated up there.

the answer was an overwhelming YES.

Here's the thing: Hastings is part of Westchester County, but also the town of Greenburgh. Yonkers is part of Westchester County but a separate city. If Hastings cannot accommodate my daughter's disability, they can arrange to send her to another school in the County that can. There are some pretty good special ed classes and even private schools in Westchester. Your local school, once they agree she needs to go somewhere else, has to pay for any costs AND provide transportation.

If you are determined to stay in Yonkers, I would find an attorney that specializes in special ed and see if you can force Yonkers to send your child somewhere else. but it will cost you. Down here in Virginia in six weeks time I spent around $10K. It was worth it to me because she was being treated like a criminal in her school. they sent her to a different school in the county to a self contained special ed room with children with ED (emotional disturbances - don't you love that term) which I accepted but it's basically a jail cell and they are using a basket hold to calm her down which I find out is ILLEGAL to use in New York. So part of my decision to move is based on literally saving my daughter's life . . .

I digress.

and I completely concur with what everyone says about parochial schools. they simply do not have the funding to provide the special ed services that public schools HAVE to provide, and they're not going to.

have you thought you renting out your house and moving to a rental in another locality? that is what I'm doing here. I'm in a 2000 sq. foot, one year old luxury townhouse. I can't sell it now - nothing is moving here - but I"m going to rent it out and rent a tiny apartment up there until the market here improves so I can sell it and buy a coop up there. I'm going to rent it out for a little less than my mortgage payment and monthly assessment but I don't care - it's cheaper than private school tuition! so you have to balance and assess all the aspects of your situation. you will have to make some sacrifices and trade-offs - there is no perfect solution.

sorry to go on so long, but this is a story I am all too familiar with.

[KarenBo]

K&F is correct. ADD/ADHD can indeed fall under the umbrella of Special Education. Any child that needs additional services even if it is for health reasons such as physical disabilities falls under the category of Special Education. In fact, "Gifted" programs are considered special education - at least they were in my Master's program in Special Ed. Most schools however run an honors class instead. I teach a mixture of ED (emotionally disabled) and LD (learning disabled) students.

On a side note, I have never used a basket hold on a child, but it is my understanding that it is not illegal to do so if the child is acting in a way that would be dangerous to him/herself or others. Its supposed to be used in crisis situations, not long term. The excessive use of such a method is another story...

[slowloris]

I went to school in Ardsley, and I remember then bending over backwards for any student with a learning disability. I feel that a good public school is the way to go, because they need to cater to your kid. If they don't it looks bad on them and their national ranking, which sadly is what most of these better schools think about the most. Its a tough decision, but I went to a good perochial school in Yonkers, and the difference between coming here was night and day. I felt that the Catholic school did me better for respect and stuff, but in terms of education...no comparison whatsoever. I basically had to start from scratch here. The curriculum was backwards, and it wasn't the teachers fault, but their lack of resources.

[Kevrltr]

The White Plains Schools system has a very good reputation for special needs kids.

All the best!

Kevin O'Shea

[leticia626]

My son was diagnosed with ADD, I was forced to have him checked out by the school, saying he need more services. this was in 4th grade, I then had him on medication since half thru the year of 7th grade. I had enough, it wasnt his so call ADD, it was the public schools "Special Education" that was the issue, they say there giving him all the extra help, but who is looling over the teachers to make sure?? Also alot of the special education prgrams do not have qualified "special" education teachers..I have been through alot with my son, that I got feed up and took him out of public schools. My advice to you is, wherever you go check teachers qualifications, if you feel there not giving him what he needs, seek a Student Advocate, theres one in Elmsford, These public schools is all about money and meeting the budget. I can go on and on....Bottoom line do what you have to do to get him help now! My son missed out on alot of learning, he can not even write, I had to retain him back in 8th grade. If you have to sell your home, do it!...You only have one chance to get it right with your son, you can always buy another home. Dont let the school system brush him by. Good luck

[streetsmart]

I just wanted to say that when I was a special ed teacher in NYC, ADD/ADHD was NOT a classification for an IEP or special ed services. If there was a learning disability or emotional disability along with it then you could get services, but ADD/ADHD alone would not qualify you. I believe this is because students who have attention disorders are usually of average intelligence and don't need curriculum modifications, just accommodations with regards to lesson structure and grouping, help with organization, etc...

Perhaps it is different in other districts...

[Mernie]

Thank you Leticia626, Where do I find this Student Advocate in Elmsford?? What type of agency is it under. Good Luck to you too!!