Disappointed in Asheville... (Henderson, Hendersonville, Welcome: insurance, day care, loan)

[anifani821]

Originally Posted by Halo_in_reverse

Hi, I'd like to offer up a POV from someone who is originally from Asheville.

I grew up in Asheville. Growing up, I couldn't get away from here fast enough and left as soon as I could get to school. My thought process was that Asheville is the most boring place on earth with absolutely nothing at all to do. Ahhh, the misperceptions of youth. What I failed to realize was that Asheville was kind and generous and unpretentious and you knew your neighbors. I guess Robert Frost was right when he said, “nothing gold can stay”.

I came back a few times over the years. Each time it got a little bit more "odd". Something was just not quite right with my home town. It was a little faster, a little meaner and a little more well…. rude. You see, that's what I thought I wanted in another city. I thought that living in a fast paced city (DC) with lots of things to do would be a better fit for me and my wannabe upwardly mobile lifestyle. I felt the need to “hide” my accent. I thought it hindered me socially and professionally. I didn’t tell people where I was from originally. I usually just said Atlanta or Charlotte. I was embarrassed. I thought that being from the south and from a dinky little town like Asheville was somehow a slight against me. As if it made me look bad or uncultured or uneducated. I wanted so hard to try and “fit in”. I fought my upbringing tooth and nail! I was the type that chose to visit her family as opposed to having them visit me. I didn’t want to be embarrassed by my family and their “southern ways” in front of my yuppie friends. Whom, coincidentally, were mostly from up north. You know at some point I ever adopted their accents. I began using words like “you guys” and “wicked” every chance I got in order to fit in. How stupid was I? How could one person get it so wrong?

I decided a few years ago that I would move back to Asheville. I thought, yes, Asheville has FINALLY changed over the years. It’s more cultured, more refined and more upscale and a lot more Northern in nature and mentality. YES! Finally, Asheville has some “class”.

What I didn’t realize was that I had changed too. I came back here thinking this was going to be the best move ever! But, what had really happened was that the luster of a fast paced city had dulled. Deep down I knew I didn’t want that lifestyle anymore. I didn’t want to not know my neighbors. I wanted my kids to be able to play in their neighborhood like I did and not worry about being molested, shot at, or run down by crazy drivers. I wanted to come “home” and have the warm comfort of a great summer night sitting around a front porch listening to the crickets and chatting with my neighbors. I wanted someone to finally throw their hand up in acknowledgement when I let them into traffic. I wanted people to hold the door and say please and thank you. I wanted clerks in stores to be kind. I wanted friends I was not in competition with. I wanted to eat meat and not be judged. I wanted to go to church with my family and not be labeled a Bible Beater. I wanted my home.

Thomas Wolff was right, “you can’t go home again”. My home is no longer here. The city isn’t the same. It’s nothing personal against anyone who moved here and brought their ways with them. I know that cities and times change. That doesn’t mean that I don’t mourn the loss of a truly great city. I wish that at the time I knew just how lucky I was to have Asheville as my hometown. I should have stayed. I never should have abandoned Her. I weep at what She has become. It’s so cold here now. I don’t know any of my neighbors and everyone is in such a hurry. My mountains are disappearing and being replace by houses. The air isn’t as fresh. She is a bit more dirty now. I wish I had appreciated the Asheville of the 70s and early 80s a little more. I wish I had appreciated knowing my neighbors, saying ya’ll, remembering to say thank you to the store clerks and having them return the kindness and not driving at break neck pace on the interstate. In short, I wish I had appreciated Her and kept Her close to my heart. I failed you Asheville.

So now, I am a person adrift. An orphan if you will. I will probably live out my days here and with time, I will adapt to the new Asheville. I will grow to accept Her as she is. Warts and all. But, She will NEVER be the same. She will never be that kind, gentle woman of the mountains that I should have been a better child of.

Thank “ya’ll” for reading my terribly long post. I hope you enjoyed hearing a native’s perspective on what Asheville has become.

You said it all. I am right there with you, and understand exactly what you are expressing. I have other friends who are natives from the Asheville region, and they also would understand what you have stated. There is a lot more I could say about the "rudeness" and the weirdness that has been imposed on the area by people who have insisted they "change" things in order to fit w/ customs and ideas they brought w/ them from other places, but I really don't want to have to think about it. I have just basically dismissed A'ville as a place to spend any time . . . b/c it no longer is enjoyable being there.

The charm of the South is being diluted all across the region. Let's just leave it at that.

[CosmicWizard]

andybuildz wrote:

It's really all within you as hokey as that may sound.

Not hokey at all Andy. That's the way has has always been and probably always will be! If ya ain't got it inside of ya, ya just ain't got it! If you're unhappy living in City A, chances are, you'll be just as unhappy living in City B. I forget the name of the guru who said this, but here it is anyway...wherever you go, there you are.

[charmed1591]

Well as far as people go, i also live here in the outskirts of asheville. I do believe your post was in part correct but sounds more like the center of downtown, and not the whole city. center of town is where all the pot heads, drunks, tree huggers, and so forth live. but i see that in most cities. family friendly and diversity is in the outer of the center of downtown., im sorry you didnt get to see that part. as far as diversity i believe you mean gay couples. AND boy is asheville filled with them. If you know where to go and meet poeple, they live all around as normal families with children.
if you mean color or race. well then take a look again in the not so downtown area. we are everywhere. Gays, blacks, hispanics, indians, and so forth.

[Podunk12]

I am an Asheville native who has recently moved to find a job. And I can tell you the job market for fresh out of college or high schoolers is completely dead for the age group of 18-30 year olds looking for a nice entry level job that pays well. And by well I mean able to afford a decent way of life.

I was born and raised in Asheville back when Hendersonville Rd was just two lanes (Oh my God! Can you imagine!). I loved Asheville as a kid and so did my parents, that is why the moved here.

The problems that Asheville now faces are due to the previous mayor and city counsel and the current mayor and city counsel.
In 1996 Mayor Lenny Sitnick told Atlanta during the Olympics to bus the homeless here, and now they stay and keep coming. Try going downtown without being pestered every few feet.
The old city counsel was also strongly against growth. They voted down expanding interstates, highways, and even some roads. But people came anyways.
They also voted against big-box stores from opening, which is fine with me, but they came anyways.
They voted to keep Asheville small and quiet, they did not want a huge influx of people because there just is not the room for a large population in the valley.
Now the real problem came when the new mayor and city counsel arrived.
These people decided that Asheville should grow grow grow.
They have allowed developers to place homes all over the sides of the mountains.
They have allowed developers to smash as many homes on an acre as possible (which is an open invitation for people to move to Asheville).
They have allowed an enormous influx of people into a small area, which is making it over crowded quickly.
They allowed for the expansion of the interstates(which is GREATLY needed and has been for 10 years).

But the one thing that Asheville simply cannot supply to people is careers. There just are not enough good careers in Asheville for people to get their foot in the door. Sure, you can work retail, then be the retail manager, then even maybe an area manager. But we all know that those numbers dwindle very quickly from 100 entry retail, 10 manager, 1 area manager. So there just are not enough of those jobs available.
Also, there are no longer as many manufacturing companies because the city taxes have risen so much over the past few decades they have moved.
This is why more than 70% of the people I know from Asheville have moved to find work or moved to keep their job when the company moved.

The city is also "cashing in" on the Biltmore name by naming everything after it. Such as Biltmore Lake which is 20 miles west of Biltmore and use to be called ENKA Lake (Which is also where many of the blue collar workers who built this city lived, aka Rednecks and who will admit it.) Another quick example is Biltmore Park, which is 15 miles south of Biltmore in Skyland. It just sickens me that to give the facade of wealth throughout the area they are naming everything Biltmore.

My biggest problems with Asheville is this; They are inviting way too many people to move to the area and they are forcing the people who built this wonderful area out and replacing them with "foreigners" who are destroying the areas way of life and heritage. Give it a few years and Asheville will be gone and replaced with some pseudo-Asheville full of well-to-do out of towner's and an over populated area. The heritage, history, and culture that use to be, and is still hanging on, will be gone within 10 years. I'll bet you will see the Asheville-Hendersonville metro area on the map soon.

[pap/paws]

Gypsychic: I read a lot , post a little, here on the forum, and have enjoyed your comments over the last year. I often say, here is another gal who thinks a lot like me. But now I am confused. You see, I just read that you are also here in fl (I'm in swfl, thinking about WNC), and this morning as I was researching Kenilworth Inn, there was a chat from you as a resident of the Forest. Since i have several small dogs, the Inn is a good bet for me. And I was heartened to see your good comments (2007). And I thought, hmmm, she's got some good feelings about Kenilworth F. Oh....sorry to bore everyone else reading this, but consider that every town/city has different areas, and it sounds like the focus on Asheville is the downtown area. There is the Kenilworth area and Biltmore Village area, and though I've just seen it once a few yrs ago (we are usually in the mtns.), it seems like a nice place to live, in-town.

[gypsychic]

Originally Posted by pap/paws

Gypsychic: I read a lot , post a little, here on the forum, and have enjoyed your comments over the last year. I often say, here is another gal who thinks a lot like me. But now I am confused. You see, I just read that you are also here in fl (I'm in swfl, thinking about WNC), and this morning as I was researching Kenilworth Inn, there was a chat from you as a resident of the Forest. Since i have several small dogs, the Inn is a good bet for me. And I was heartened to see your good comments (2007). And I thought, hmmm, she's got some good feelings about Kenilworth F. Oh....sorry to bore everyone else reading this, but consider that every town/city has different areas, and it sounds like the focus on Asheville is the downtown area. There is the Kenilworth area and Biltmore Village area, and though I've just seen it once a few yrs ago (we are usually in the mtns.), it seems like a nice place to live, in-town.

Hi Pap-Paws! Yes, we do have our second home there in Kenilworth Forest, which we purchased 3 years ago. We absolutely love the neighborhood and neighbors there, it is quiet and CLOSE to everything! The biggest reason we are selling is that we do not have the time or $$$$ to get up there often enough to justify ownership of a home there and hubby is years away from retirement. Add to that the fact that we relocated here in Fla. to a town that we are much happier with than our former town, and we realized this is the practical thing to do.

Downtown is changing, I am not going to say for the better or worse, it's just that it's not quite as charming as when we first saw it, but it's not that I think it's bad, just not as different or special as we once thought. Asheville is wonderful though. I really have loved our little house in KF because as I said, it's a country setting in the middle of town - people can't believe how quiet it is back there and it's right behind the mall!

Anyway, good luck on the Inn, it looks like a charming place, and feel free to send me a DM if you want!

[jbird22]

Originally Posted by Podunk12

My biggest problems with Asheville is this; They are inviting way too many people to move to the area and they are forcing the people who built this wonderful area out and replacing them with "foreigners" who are destroying the areas way of life and heritage. Give it a few years and Asheville will be gone and replaced with some pseudo-Asheville full of well-to-do out of towner's and an over populated area. The heritage, history, and culture that use to be, and is still hanging on, will be gone within 10 years. I'll bet you will see the Asheville-Hendersonville metro area on the map soon.

Podunk12, while I understand your post, you must realize that there are some folks who were "foreigners" who put Asheville on the Map. For Example, George Vanderbilt, who built the Biltmore estate, etc. was originally from New York. Not all folks who move to the area are bad for the area... (case in point: me!). I "married" into the area, if you will. I love it here. I am just a working jerk who moved to the area because I grew to love it and the people. I live in a very blue collar neighborhood, and bought a home that was built in 1940 and needed a lot of work. I get up and go to work everyday, and work to put food on the table and pay bills. I have done this pretty much everywhere I have lived. I did NOT build on top of a mountain... I am trying to better my little home to bring it back to its heydey. I feel the spirit of the people who built it (I researched deeds, etc. to put together a picture of how it came about) and I have a great respect for them. I want their children to be proud that we have worked to clear the weeds, and plant some shrubs, and put a new roof on, etc. The house that they grew up in, I hope, is looking more like they house that they grew up in. I strive to be a good neighbor and friend.

I think a lot of "second homers" have left a bad taste here. Locals get the feeling that many of them perceive them (the locals) and the area, to be, just "used" by the second homers solely for their pleasure, and that doesn't always sit well. ( i.e., a take-take relationship, vs. a give-take one)

So while I understand your sentiments, I wanted to mention - for what it's worth - that not all people who move here are detrimental to the area.

[rossana38]

All these comments are really making me skeptical about moving up to Asheville. I truly fell in love with North Carolina the last few times I have visited up there...so much so that I am planning to move up there in June. I find it so peaceful and beautiful. I live in West Palm Beach and I can no longer stand living here. The home prices, prices in general, the people that can't bring themselves to say hello on the street, the traffic, everything. The only one pro around here is that the jobs for hispanics still exist. My husband is Cuban and has lived here for three years. His English is very rough and every time he has made an application in North Carolina, they have belittled him tremendously. He has applied for jobs in landscaping, carpentry, golf maintainance, dishwashing. He is an electronics technician, as well as a carpenter, plumber, overall handyman, and has extensive knowledge of golf course maintainance. He is willing to work in just about anything. Problem is again, his English. I know the people in Asheville may not be used to Hispanics in their area, but wow. I on the other hand, speak perfect English and I applied for two jobs and I got both of them because both of the supervisors were from Florida and are very open minded. I am feeling a little frustrated and becoming something I have never been...stereotypical. Can anyone give me a little guidance?

[fastfilm]

Can any of you NC natives help the above poster with info about Tiger Wood's proposed new golf complex in Swannanoa?

Secondly, rossana, I live in L.A., where I see so many advertisements for "accent reduction." It's really an investment for one's career, and your husband might investigate into whatever your city offers that's similar. If actors of lesser skills can do it, your husband can too! It's close to as important as learning our language to begin with. Good luck.

[mm34b]

Originally Posted by rossana38

I know the people in Asheville may not be used to Hispanics in their area.

There's a fairly sizable Hispanic population in the Asheville area:

Buncombe County - 4.0% of the population.
Henderson County - 8.3%
Haywood County - 1.8%
Madison County - 1.7%

City of Asheville - 3.8%