NC a modern day gold rush? (Asheville, Franklin: appointed, new home, job market)

[lorriem]

Originally Posted by the Parkies

We're on Mountain Time here. It's just part of the difference in cultures, a difference in attitudes, in way of life. Bill and I understand it because we lived in San Diego, just half an hour from Mexico, so some of my wedding clients were Mexican, often with homes on both sides of the border. We grew to expect Mexican weddings to begin late--sometimes very late--and run overtime--sometimes by a lot. As one client booked our ensemble and I reviewed the timeframe for music with him, he gave me a warmhearted chuckle and said, "Now remember, we're Mexican. We're on Mexican Time!!" So there was nothing negative or embarrassing about "Mexican time" to Mexicans. While I had to remind them that we needed to pay musicians overtime pay, I actually liked their slower, more relaxed attitude better than our frenetic, "crazy-busy" pace. We are adapting very nicely here in WNC to the same much more relaxed pace.

For example, the excellent designer/contractor who's helping us remodel our house is a native North Carolinian (Robbinsville/Sylva). She speaks so much more slowly than I'm accustomed to that I catch myself thinking now and then, "Can you hurry it up a little?--I'm paying you by the hour!" But that's only a habit of mind! I can't help enjoying that hour, even if it costs a little more, because it's so darned pleasant sharing time with someone who's calm and relaxed enough to be creative, comforting, and hospitable. I want to be like her. I always hate to see her leave. (P.S. We have come to realize that her hour may not actually cost us more, since in her relaxed state of mind she is no doubt more creative and able to accomplish more than someone else who chases his tail and talks backwards!)

Lorrie, we, too, need landscaping, handywork, carpet, wood floors, new kitchen, furniture--lots of things--and were still surprised when the designer said it "might could" take up to a year to get everything done. Then I remembered that it took nine months to put a second story on our house in San Diego (no furniture or furnishings--just the bones), and the experience was a nightmare that ended up in desertion by the contractor and the pain of arbitration (we won, but no one paid our stress bill). So what's another three months of remodeling if it's entirely pleasant and successful, you develop a new friendship along the way, and you've learned a healthier, saner, more enjoyable way of life?

Make sense?

P.S. On her first visit to our old, ugly, disheveled kitchen, our sweet designer brought a dozen multi-colored roses from Fresh Market. We were touched. No designer or contractor in San Diego would ever think of doing that. Those roses all opened, one by one, and are still gracing our old kitchen 10 days later. We loved the idea, so we bought a dozen roses from Fresh Market today ($9.00--what a bargain!!) and gave them to a special friend in Black Mountain. Now she'll pass on the idea to a brother celebrating an anniversary today. And that's how Southern hospitality works. It's not about quantity and speed. It's about quality and value. And it's genuine. It has a soul.

So yes, cafetbird, we agree with you. And to the OP, there IS a better life to be found here if you know how to understand it, appreciate it, and adopt it. Best of luck to you!

Jan

Jan I understand what you are saying but we lived in CA also for 25 years and our landscaper was always on time and did the job we asked him to do without a problem. BTW he was mexican also. We also had a mexican housekeeper and she was always on time. All I want right know is tell me if you cannot do the job next week. Tell me it might be in a few weeks that I would be grateful for.

[the Parkies]

I think we're saying two different things, Lorrie. People of all cultures and mindsets ought to keep their word--certainly. If they say they'll do the job on Monday, they should do it. And they should be considerate of your need for their commitment if you express that clearly. If they say they will finish the job by next Friday, they should.

What I was saying is that not all people are as "driven" as Southern Californians (and others) to do the job now, today, this week, next week at the latest. So we're saying two different things, I think.

BTW, our Mexican help in San Diego was always on time, too, and did a great job. We had the same wonderful housekeeper and gardener for 13 years.

If you're not getting commitment or not getting the job done by those you're trying to hire, I'd start asking for more references from neighbors and friends. We don't hire anyone without getting leads from those we know and trust. Our realtor led us to our designer and housekeeper; our designer led us to our landscaper; our landscaper led us to the best garden center... and so on. Even then, we usually get three bids.

As you may know, another reliable source of references is often a related business. The garden center passes out a landscaper's business cards; the paint store passes out a painter's cards. Those service people want to protect their source of customers, so will treat each of them well. The best services are also the busiest, though. Again, it's about quality and value... and patience.... We've learned from experience (in CA) that we don't want the lowest bidder or the fastest to respond!!!

Jan

[lorriem]

Jan I think I did missunderstand you. When you said "he gave me a warmhearted chuckle and said, "Now remember, we're Mexican. We're on Mexican Time!!" I just assumed he meant whenever he got around to it and no time frame. That, like I said before just give me a time frame of when I can expect you to start the job. Don't say next week when you mean next month.
We have gotten references and our neighbors and friends are also having problems.I would think that when one is willing to pay for your service and pay well that would make a difference in a town that has lost alot of jobs. The money we pay them they in turn will spend in the town. Thats the way I see it.

[the Parkies]

Exactly. And your expectation is reasonable. We agree.

[lorriem]

Originally Posted by cafetbird

Yes, there is a major influx of folks from the north. Where I live, it is hard to find a native North Carolinian any longer - mostly folks from New York (and Florida "halfbacks"), Michigan, and Ohio, looking for a better quality of life. The only problem with this is that it is changing the long standing reputation of the South for warmth, friendliness, and hospitality. Many of the folks moving in grew up with different values, and simply find it difficult to live life at a slower, friendlier pace. This has resulted in something of a "culture clash" - it really isn't the civil war thing, is is more of a state of being. When you come down, be prepared to slow down, relax and enjoy! You'll be appreciated if you do.

I was not going to respond to this post because some of what you say is true but when you say "Many of the folks moving in grew up with different values, and simply find it difficult to live life at a slower, friendlier pace"I grew up to tell the truth, work hard and love your family.I see nothing wrong in the values my parents taught me and I grew up on LI. I do agree the pace was faster but once my husband and I moved away from Long Island to NH it slowed down and in CA and then in FL the pace of life stayed the same. I have not seen any culture class except in work ethics. I sold furniture for many years and on my day's off if one of my customers needed to see me I went to the store and saw them or went to their house. I was "am" reliable and my customers always came first. To me that is a good thing.

[cafetbird]

Originally Posted by lorriem

I grew up to tell the truth, work hard and love your family.I see nothing wrong in the values my parents taught me and I grew up on LI.

Lorrie - I didn't mean to offend you, sorry if I did. I wasn't implying that there was anything wrong with the values you grew up with - I am sure there isn't. Of course, the people here also believe in truth, hard work, and family - it would be insulting to suggest otherwise. The way they interact culturally is a little different than where you come from, however. Some folks have trust issues with the folks coming into the area from the outside, and much of that goes way back. Most of the places you mention as having lived have long consisted of large transplant populations (except for mybe NH, but they are used to new Yorkers ;-)). If you consider the culture of Appalicia, you'll see that this influx is a very recent phenomonon here. This area was cut off from the rest of the world for a long time, and people here are still adjusting to this change.

Another thing that I pick up on is that folks come here from other parts of the country with an attitude that the locals as they are just plain dumb, or seem to behave contemptuously towards them. I think it is to some extent simply the way transplants are accustomed to interacting culturally, and I often not meant as disrespectful. I am not suggesting that you treat anyone this way, but others do. That breeds a bit of mistrust and hesitiation in locals. Relationships, and who you are related to, are are important to folks here, and in bigger cities this is just not that much of a factor. The more you get to know these folks, the more trust you will develop with them.

You could write a whole book on this, and several folks have. It has taken Foxfire 12 volumes to explain the culture here, and they still are not done! You have esentially moved into a different country.

[lorriem]

Originally Posted by cafetbird

Lorrie - I didn't mean to offend you, sorry if I did. I wasn't implying that there was anything wrong with the values you grew up with - I am sure there isn't. Of course, the people here also believe in truth, hard work, and family - it would be insulting to suggest otherwise. The way they interact culturally is a little different than where you come from, however. Some folks have trust issues with the folks coming into the area from the outside, and much of that goes way back. Most of the places you mention as having lived have long consisted of large transplant populations (except for mybe NH, but they are used to new Yorkers ;-)). If you consider the culture of Appalicia, you'll see that this influx is a very recent phenomonon here. This area was cut off from the rest of the world for a long time, and people here are still adjusting to this change.

Another thing that I pick up on is that folks come here from other parts of the country with an attitude that the locals as they are just plain dumb, or seem to behave contemptuously towards them. I think it is to some extent simply the way transplants are accustomed to interacting culturally, and I often not meant as disrespectful. I am not suggesting that you treat anyone this way, but others do. That breeds a bit of mistrust and hesitiation in locals. Relationships, and who you are related to, are are important to folks here, and in bigger cities this is just not that much of a factor. The more you get to know these folks, the more trust you will develop with them.

You could write a whole book on this, and several folks have. It has taken Foxfire 12 volumes to explain the culture here, and they still are not done! You have esentially moved into a different country.

cafetbird You did not offend me and what you say about "new Yorkers ;-))." I had to laugh. Sorry to anyone from NY but when we lived in FL for 3 years we came across many people from NY accent and all. I couldn't take them for to me most would never smile, no hello, they would even rush to the front of the line at the supermarket.I would ask hubby many times were we ever like them? Like I said we grew up on the Island but lived there not as long as CA. Heck I even lost my accent. Like I also said was I love the people here.Always a smile on their face and hello even though you do not know them. My main gripe is time frame. When you say you will be here Monday I assume they meant this Monday not a Monday three weeks from now. A simple phone call would be great telling me they could not come. That is common courtesy wouldn't you say? I stay home waiting for someone to come and give me a quote or start the job and no one shows up. I am told by them when we hire them we really need the money but when it is time to work it is a no show. I do not understand.

You also say "I think it is to some extent simply the way transplants are accustomed to interacting culturally, and I often not meant as disrespectful. I am not suggesting that you treat anyone this way, but others do. That breeds a bit of mistrust and hesitiation in locals."

What you said also can work the other way. There is just so many times a person will put up with that and then we mistrust the local workers and look for transplants. I need to trust that a person will come and do the job I hired them to do. If they can't do that then my trust is gone in them and when some one asks who would you hire I would say who I would and who I wouldn't and the word would get around. To earn money you have to work and they say they need the money they will only be hurting themselves.
My husband is a cancer survivor. He was in the hospital for 10 days. He was back to work two weeks after he came home. During Chemo he missed maybe one day at work. No excuses.

[lorriem]

To be fair. We have had a great NC realtor(we love her to death) who is still helping us and she was raised in Lenoir also we had wonderful fence put in by a Local and a great screened in porch put in by a local.

[HMS]

I live in Franklin, NC and have a neighbor girl that is an RN now returning to school to become a nurse practitioner. The state will payoff 60% of her student loans if she stays in western NC. Now, she says that Dentists have a blank check from the state as far as student loans, office set up and staffing.
I would be checking this out pronto!

Howard

[chardent]

Originally Posted by HMS

I live in Franklin, NC and have a neighbor girl that is an RN now returning to school to become a nurse practitioner. The state will payoff 60% of her student loans if she stays in western NC. Now, she says that Dentists have a blank check from the state as far as student loans, office set up and staffing.
I would be checking this out pronto!

Howard

I'm a dentist. This is not true. One can qualify for partial FEDERAL (not state) loan forgiveness if they work a minimum of 2 years in a government clinic (health dept, prison, etc.). It amounts to a vastly cumbersome and restrictive situation. I know, I tried it.

I know of absolutely no program that will pay you to purchase an office and equip it. That in itself is an expensive proposition.