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I'm the type of person that takes responsibility and blames myself for my own successes and failures. I am brutal and realistic with myself, maybe too much so. So when I hear people blaming their work problems on bad bosses, my past reaction was to take it with a grain of salt.
I had always worked in a corporate environment where people knew each others work, at least to some degree. This time I am in a vacuum with only one person to report to. She made my life a living hell and is very temperamental person...one day in good mood, another day not.
The owner interacts only with her and every communication goes through her. I cannot even talk to the clients, that's how insulated/isolated I am. I know for a fact that she bad mouths me, and the owner believes everything. I have never felt so insecure in my life and have started my search. But, I am sad that most likely I cannot trust to get a future reference, and this job was huge waste of time.
If anyone can give me word of encouragement or a story to share, I would appreciate it.
Sorry, cannot share a story because this is my story....
I am also actively searching for another job. However, I need to come up with better questions and be able to read the body language of managers more effectively. Too many managers are saying one thing during the interview but are turning out to be someone/something else once hired.
Too many managers want the title and money, but lack people and management skills. My issue is not solely with the economy it is more so with the quality of managers.
You can't win in this situation. Your boss is controlling access to everything. The best environments are where there is more transparency with a more flat management structure. You may want to bide your time and look for another position.
Stay positive, stay in control and do not show emotion to your boss. If your boss raises their voice or gets emotional while you remain calm, professional, and unemotional, you will have the upper hand. And whatever you do, don't say anything negative about your current situation or your current company to any prospective employers. Your time to repay your boss for their transgressions would be when you leave the company, at your exit interview - again in a professional and unemotional manner (just state the facts without being inflamatory).
Well when you say "owner" I can only think of a smaller company where this person's ego drives a lot of decisions and it's very easy to imbalance an operation by having a favorite, as in this case, must be this person you report to. I was in a similar situation once and it only worked out when I left at the height of frustration for a better company. There was no talking to the person, no sense of fairness, since it's whatever they determine it to be. It's a lesson learned and as others say, keep a good attitude and start looking elsewhere. And don't blame things you can't control on yourself, especially if your work is good. It isn't you it's them in this situation and it's ok, the only thing you can do is plan to change.
Location: East of Seattle since 1992, 615' Elevation, Zone 8b - originally from SF Bay Area
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One of the most important questions in an interview is usually at the end, something like "is there anything you would like to ask me (us)?"
Not only does this provide an opportunity to demonstrate your knowledge of the company and interest in working for them with a good answer, it also opens the door for you to inquire as to the reason for the opening you are applying for.
If it's a newly created position, you can be confident that the co-workers will be welcoming you, as they have been overworked and needed help.
If they indicate something like "it was a confidential issue that we can't discuss" let it go, most likely someone was fired and you will have to do your very best to avoid the same fate if hired there.
If they say that the incumbent was promoted to supervisor, watch out. Most likely the person was promoted due to their great work but has no supervisory experience, so you and your new co-workers will end up
like you are now.
You could even ask about the background of the person who would be your boss (who is probably in the room interviewing you) which I personally would consider a great question, but some might take it personally and reject you for asking.
You don't need a reference since you're already working there. Just find another job and move on. Sorry it happened to you.
Agreed. If they ask for a reference from the current employer, tell them you don't want to have the current employer contacted because they don't know you're looking.
You can also be honest and state that you come from a large corporate environment and are currently with a very small business and you want to work for a larger company again.
And don't blame things you can't control on yourself, especially if your work is good. It isn't you it's them in this situation and it's ok, the only thing you can do is plan to change.
First of all, thank you all for your words of wisdom. The above quote is definitely something I keep telling myself even though each day is a struggle and filled with anxiety.
As far as references go, what I actually meant was that once I do leave this job, I cannot trust anyone to be my future reference (in case I need it at some point). It's especially sad when recruiters ask for references from most recent supervisors, and I will have to find some way to explain this one away.
Someone gave me some advice once...more times then not-people quit managers not the job.
Sorry but I'm sure a lot of us have those stories....
Mine-about 6 months ago I was pulled in the directors office and was told I would never be promoted at the company-no examples and no reason why-I have over 10 years experience and have been a supervisor before I moved from out of state.
Okay no problem....I have saved my money paid off most of my bills-and in the next 2-4 weeks I'm quitting, going back to school to get into healthcare.
Don't quit if some jackass makes your life hell-just move on to something better. For me, it was the wakeup call I needed..my industry is dead and I need to do something else.
Someone gave me some advice once...more times then not-people quit managers not the job.
Exactly!
I think almost everyone who has worked for a number of years, has run into a terrible boss or two.
That's when it's time to start looking -- and it's wise to see the writing on the wall and get out while there is still time.
A terrible boss can undermine someone's self-confidence and happiness, unfortunately heavy-handedness can be someones management style. The best thing is to move on and get somewhere more positive.
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