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What amazes me is when people think they have all the answers and make it their business what other people do with their lives.
People should make decisions that work best for them; it's not about what's PC or sanctioned by society.
If someone wants to be at home, so be it; if they want to leave the house and go to work, so be it; if they want to stay at home and work a paid job from 'inside' their house, so be it.
Do What's Best for You and Your Particular Situation - it's not a difficult formula to follow.
If the OP didn't want other opinions, she really shouldn't have posted this on the internet. She made it our business.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jasper03
Refer to post #214. That sums it up for me. Op keep enjoying life and don't worry about what folks think. As long as you aren't asking them for a handout who gives a crap about what they think. Are you and dh happy? That's what matters the most.
I think if she were happy she wouldn't need validation from complete strangers online.
seems antiquated for an able bodied adult not to have a career. Better to just have fewer kids and maintain your independence. What happens if you break up?
What amazes me is when people think they have all the answers and make it their business what other people do with their lives.
People should make decisions that work best for them; it's not about what's PC or sanctioned by society.
If someone wants to be at home, so be it; if they want to leave the house and go to work, so be it; if they want to stay at home and work a paid job from 'inside' their house, so be it.
Do What's Best for You and Your Particular Situation - it's not a difficult formula to follow.
While I agree with this, she did post this on a public forum......
However, there are many, many people that don't talk much about their lives and are intruded upon by those that think their way of life is what everyone should be doing. That is where the problem lies. And if you are not doing what they are doing, you get demeaned and called lazy. Like I said before if a person is truly happy they don't demean others.
Of course there are the households where both work yet the woman is still the only one taking care of all the house and kid stuff anyways, but those are another story. Bottom line is, if you can swing it, both are happy and you're not in risk of being put out on the street - do what makes you happy and ignore the judgemental idiots .
I was a housewife for a couple of years. My husband and I were both happy with that arrangement. And then life happened.
My husband developed a debilitating illness and was bedridden for a year. Although we were fine during that time on his disability, his illness really shook me up. It made me remember that he might not be around forever and that I needed to be able to support myself--just in case...
So I got a job in my field, but at a lower, less stressful and lower paying level to maintain my job skills and keep myself employable.
Even after hubby fully recovered and went back to work, I continued to work. His illness so scared me that I realized I needed to ensure that I wouldn't have too much difficulty finding a higher paying job if I ever needed it, by keeping myself in the job market and current in my field.
I think a person should do whatever they are comfortable with and whatever makes them happy. Eventhough this person posted her thoughts on a public forum, I still think it is rude for other people to demean her and call her lazy. What`s lazy? One person can work fulltime and think they are something special. Then along comes another person working 10 hr days and going to school parttime thinking the first person is lazy. Then along comes another person, working fulltime, going to school, and taking care of 3 kids. She thinks the other 2 are lazy.
I understand someone saying THEY couldn`t be a stay at home wife. Fine, work if you want to. But to call someone else lazy because they aren`t doing what you think they should be doing is wrong. Give your opinion on what`s right for YOU and why you feel it`s right for YOU. But don`t demean someone else because they feel differently.
Having said that, I`ve told my girls to always make sure you can support yourself. Because you never know when you will have to. Like the other poster said...life happens. You never know when life will throw you a curve and your plans will change. Always be prepared for the worst. If you can stay at home and have a backup plan, then good on you. Be happy, that`s what life is about. Whatever that entails for each us is different.
Be a lazy housewife if you want, but when you are out in the dating scene again looking for another living (I mean man) you think you are "owed", don't call men who refuse to support you losers and make up some story about natural selection. Gender roles for both sexes are sexism.
Now is that necessary? This post proves my point about the demeaning and name calling.
If the OP didn't want other opinions, she really shouldn't have posted this on the internet. She made it our business.
I think if she were happy she wouldn't need validation from complete strangers online.
That's why I'm wondering why get mad and worked up if you don't want to read what other people have to say. lol Doesn't make any sense to me. I never was the one to be PC about issues and I will not coddle anybody on an issue like this.
The OP and the other housewives on here seem to be seeking validation and get mad at anybody who doesn't agree with it.
I was a housewife for a couple of years. My husband and I were both happy with that arrangement. And then life happened.
My husband developed a debilitating illness and was bedridden for a year. Although we were fine during that time on his disability, his illness really shook me up. It made me remember that he might not be around forever and that I needed to be able to support myself--just in case...
So I got a job in my field, but at a lower, less stressful and lower paying level to maintain my job skills and keep myself employable.
Even after hubby fully recovered and went back to work, I continued to work. His illness so scared me that I realized I needed to ensure that I wouldn't have too much difficulty finding a higher paying job if I ever needed it, by keeping myself in the job market and current in my field.
I don't think most women think about the consequences of doing so. Anyway, I feel like why should the woman be the one to sacrifice having a life anyway. If you have kids, they need BOTH parents, not just the mother around. My mother was around all the time and it didn't make a difference on bit. At times I wish she had a life of her own, worked, and depended on herself more.
Most women I know who were housewives all their life and didn't have a life outside of the home ended up growing older and bitter about life they missed out on.
That's why I'm wondering why get mad and worked up if you don't want to read what other people have to say. lol Doesn't make any sense to me. I never was the one to be PC about issues and I will not coddle anybody on an issue like this.
The OP and the other housewives on here seem to be seeking validation and get mad at anybody who doesn't agree with it.
No, that's not it. You are talking out of your a$$ about something you know nothing about. some of the people who have an issue with you are not housewives, or even SAHM's.
I have kids. I have been a full time working mom. I have been a half time working mom. I have been a stay at home mom. I think I know a thing or 2 about the subject. I'm actually looking for a job right now, so don't tell me I'm looking for validation, when I actually WANT to go back to work.
I'm actually closer to being on the same page as you, than I am with the OP. But I wouldn't go calling other people lazy, and telling them they have no purpose in life because they see things differently than I do. That's just plain closed-minded bi***iness.
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