Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Having a big mouth gets you in trouble too. Most smart people in upper levels can sense butt kissers. Believe or not that's a turn off.
Ass kissing a turn off for upper level management? Ever heard of cronyism? I'm not for it but there are cases in almost every organization where unworthy unqualified employees get promoted because they kiss ass of the big dog executives. Big important people like to have their egos stroked and worshiped like Gods.
My plans for the weekend are none of your business.
Anything about the guy I'm dating is none of your business.
My previous employment is NONE of your business.
Where I went to school is none of your business.
My future goals are none of your business.
My pets are none of your business.
Where I live is none of your business.
What I drive is none of your business.
How much money I spend on x is none of your business.
Why I chose to dye my hair is none of your business.
The people who are RUDE are the ones who cannot accept and respect a person's boundaries. I am there to work. I do not owe YOU anything at all! WTH makes you think I owe you any kind of explanation about my life? Who the hell are you? A co-worker? It's NONE of your business.
If you want to ask me work related questions, we can chat all day but you can stay the F out of my private life. It does NOT pertain to you, it is NOT your concern, it is NONE of your business. This is NOT high school. This is a job. GROW. UP!
People naturally share some of those things when they become friends with people they work with. Not in the 1st month but overtime you will share that information if you become close to someone, it's called being human
You are being social, but you have to remember, people only care about themselves and what they want to hear. If it isn't about them, (and these types of people LOVE to talk about themselves...they will do it all day long if you let them), then it darn well better be about someone else and it better be trash.
Talk about yourself? Whatever for?! They don't want to hear about you! (General you, not personal you). Why aren't you allowing them to talk about...THEM!
Running joke line I used to have: "Ah well, enough about me, let's talk about me..." Some people were so dumb, they didn't get it.
OMG A thousand times THIS!!
I cant count the number of times that a simple question to me has mysteriously been a segue into them telling me all about their life woes. "but you just asked me if the report was ready, how does that lead to your deadbeat dad woes?"
Ass kissing a turn off for upper level management? Ever heard of cronyism? I'm not for it but there are cases in almost every organization where unworthy unqualified employees get promoted because they kiss ass of the big dog executives. Big important people like to have their egos stroked and worshiped like Gods.
They like a person that is impressive and who can get along, not be a butt kisser.
I believe there is a middle ground somewhere between spending the work day gabbing and being a completely silent loner. Many posts on this thread seem to be focused on the extremes.
I'm just the type of person where I'm all about my business, I don't like telling people too much of my personal life(especially in work situations), I'm not loud nor do I talk a lot, but that doesn't mean I'm quiet nor do I have an attitude.
Does anybody else go through this?
Oh my god, story of my life!
I happen to work in an office where people are extremely loud and social. I prefer to stay in my office, do my work, and go home. There are a couple people that I talk to periodically throughout the day, but that's it. You would think I have a second head or something.
Mostly, I just ignore it. I am very adept at tuning out people and things, but some people really just don't understand that.
Just keep doing what you're doing and don't let it bother you.
My opinion is different. I don't read the OP's post as being about not being a social butterfly - instead, I think this person is actually quite unfriendly and possibly even rude. I once shared a small office with a woman who said the same kinds of things - she was "private" and liked to keep her personal life away from work. It was BS. She was mean and unfriendly, and very untrusting. We shared that tiny office all day for three years and some of the things she refused to even discuss because they were "private" were things like, her plans for the weekend, anything at all about the man she was dating (like even his name or occupation), anything at all about any previous job she'd ever had, anything at all about any class or teacher she'd ever had, what school/s she attended for college/grad school, her future career plans, pretty much anything you can think of except "please pass me the stapler." There is "private," like, I don't want to gossip about my sex life or be in a clique at work, and then there is just plain paranoid and antisocial, like "i don't even like you or trust you enough to have even the simplest conversation with you."
^^I believe social employees tend climb the ladder faster because their social skills translate into bigger leadership roles. I'm not saying that being a chatty Kathy with get you promoted but people enjoy working with and for others who make them feel at ease, comfortable, and a pleasure to work with. Just doing your job and keeping to yourself will not get you fired but it will not get you ahead.
To the contrary, some bosses prefer that. I, personally, got handpicked for a promotion/pay hike because I stay to myself and do my work instead of floating around the office, socializing. And yes, I was told this, verbatim.
Believe it or not, a lot of employers do see primarily doing work at work means your priorities are in order.
It can make you seem stuck up or self-absorbed. Deep down though I think managers appreciate introverts because of the likelihood that they'll not be constantly interrupted at work with chitchat. I'm not saying extroverts don't also do their job, but it's possible that some people have to be reminded of what they're there to be doing; working.
So I just started somewhere part time(I'm still looking for something else, but working on the car situation so I can start applying to places out of state) and so far in my working life, I've gotten assumptions from people because I don't run my mouth nor get into deep conversations at work with people. I stumbled upon this post by somebody and it hit the nail on the head exactly how I feel in work situations:
Don't get me wrong, I always speak to people I work with and if somebody is speaking to me, I'll be friendly. Sometimes when I'm speaking to my coworkers, they act like they don't hear me so I eventually stop saying something to them altogether. Some think a simple "Good morning" back to you is hard to say back when I'm speaking to them.
I'm just the type of person where I'm all about my business, I don't like telling people too much of my personal life(especially in work situations), I'm not loud nor do I talk a lot, but that doesn't mean I'm quiet nor do I have an attitude.
Does anybody else go through this?
The way you had to say "run your mouth" gave me a negative additide towards you. I would watch it how you really feel.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
